


In the past, the present and the future as well

by JasonPeace



Category: Tokio Hotel
Genre: Comedy, Eventual Sex, First Love, First Time, M/M, Male Slash, Oral Sex, Teen Romance, Threesome, Time Travel, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-23
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-04-10 20:03:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 89,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4405610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JasonPeace/pseuds/JasonPeace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Through a bizarre accident, 16 year old Bill lands ten years in the future where he encounters his 26 year old self, living together with Tom in L.A. Not knowing where to go or how to go back home, Bill lives with Bill and Tom from the future, where he gradually begins to realize there is more between them than just brotherly love, and they are hell-bent on making him understand their twisted relationship. </p>
<p>How will Bill deal with his twin once he returns to the past, now fully knowing the secret his brother is keeping from him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Ich muss durch den Monsun, hinter die Welt, ans Ende der Zeit," Bill sang into the microphone to three thousand cheering fans.

It was the final song to their concert in Berlin, and the crowd was going crazy, however before Bill managed to continue with the rest of the lyrics, he heard a loud screeching and scraping sound. As he looked up, he saw part of the lighting from the stage coming down while the screaming from the fans turned from excited to panicked.

"Bill!"

He heard Tom's voice screaming somewhere behind him, but Bill wasn't fast enough to move out of the way and the lighting collapsed over him, burying him in a pile of electric wires and shards. He felt electric shocks going through his body and tried to scream at the agonizing pain, but no sound was coming from his lips. After what seemed like a painful eternity, he finally blacked out; the last sound in his ears was his brother screaming his name in fear.

With a soft groan Bill opened his eyes and looked into the semi darkness. He was confused and somewhat scared, trying to remember what had happened; the concert... the lighting coming down on him... Tom screaming. Slowly he realized that he was still lying on the stage, but everything, and everyone else was gone. Had they seriously just left him there?

Carefully he got up to test his body, but it seemed perfectly healthy, without any kind of impairment at all. How had he managed to get away from that without a single scratch? He'd been in so much pain a moment ago.

The concert hall was deserted, and the lights were all out; the only thing he could see was the small, green 'exit' sign on the side of the stage.

"Hello?" Bill yelled loudly, but no one answered him. Not knowing what else to do, he headed for the door that would lead him backstage.

"Hello?" he yelled again, wandering through the backstage of the empty concert hall.

"Hey, what are you doing in here?" a gruff man wearing overalls asked, sticking his head out of a door; "You're not allowed to be here!" he accused, walking towards Bill.

"I just had a concert here, but everyone left. What's going on?" Bill was completely confused.

"What concert?" the man snorted moodily; "Get outta here!" He grabbed Bill's arm and began dragging him towards the exit.

"Ow! Wait, where's my brother?" Bill tried to free himself, but the angry janitor just dragged him along.

"Don't you damn kids break in here again or I'll call the cops!" he snapped angrily and shoved Bill out the back entrance, shutting it behind him and locking it.

"But..." Bill muttered in confusion, rubbing his sore arm from the harsh treatment.

He looked around awkwardly, feeling a bit nervous; it had been a while since he'd been out on the street without bodyguards. He couldn't just walk around randomly, it would be a disaster; how could Tom just leave him there all alone?

Very slowly Bill sauntered off the concert hall grounds, trying to keep his head down so no one would recognize him, but it was difficult; he was wearing his trademark clothes, make-up and hairstyle; any person would recognize him with that outfit. Even if their success was rather recent and had only just begun last year, in Berlin there were hardly any people his age who didn't know who he was; after all Tokio Hotel had been on the front of Bravo almost every week in the past few months.

Nervously he walked down the street, but people didn't seem to be paying him much attention; a few younger ones gave him funny looks or laughed, but that was about it.

While he waited at the tram station a few passersby also eyed him curiously, but no one tried to talk to him.

Once the surprisingly modern tram arrived, Bill climbed it, filled with confusion; even on the tram back to their apartment people didn't look at him a lot; this was definitely different than last time he had tried to go somewhere; he had nearly been killed by screaming fangirls, and now no one seemed to even bother with him. Bill was almost offended.

He got out at the usual station, and headed into the building where he, Tom, Georg and Gustav lived, and now that he wasn't so nervous anymore, he began to get angry; how dare they just leave him there.

Not having a key, of course, Bill knocked angrily and rang the doorbell at least a dozen times; just to let them know he was pissed.

"What is it?!" an annoyed woman ripped the door open, staring angrily at him; Bill jumped back in surprise.

"Who are you?" he asked a bit baffled; had he seriously just knocked on the wrong door? No way... 3C, this was the right place.

"I'm Mrs. Wasner, who the hell are you?!" she asked, still full out angry.

"I...I'm Bill Kaulitz... I live here," he mumbled stupidly.

"Yeah right and I'm Oprah!" she rolled her eyes; "Stupid kids," she muttered, slamming the door in his face.

Bill stared, mouth slightly open; what had just happened?

Completely confused and more scared than before, Bill walked back down to the street and sat at the tram station; if he didn't live here, where did he live? And where was Tom? And Georg... Gustav?

After a few trams had come and gone, Bill decided to just go home to his parents; he had nowhere else to go after all. With that he began the two hour trip to Loitsche.

"Ticket," the ticket collector demanded passively; Bill didn't have one.

For the sake of appearing innocent, Bill began searching through all his pockets while the man eyed him suspiciously.

"I think I lost it," Bill eventually muttered.

The man sighed; "Right, and of course you have no money with you to buy one right now, am I right?" he asked drily; Bill shook his head.

"Where're you going, kid?" he asked gruffly.

"Home. I lost my wallet," he mumbled dejectedly, hoping the man wouldn't kick him out of the train.

"Alright, I'm gonna let you off this one time, but don't do it again," he warned, probably well knowing that his warning was useless.

Bill nodded quickly; "Thank you." The man just rolled his eyes and walked away.

After the long train ride, he finally slouched down the road to his house; thankfully the train station was only half a mile from his home.

By the time Bill finally got home, it was around 2pm, and he nearly walked past his own house; it looked completely different than last time he had seen it. Instead of the small fence they had, there was now a wall, with a security camera; what in the world...? Did he not live here anymore either?

Bill was about to panic, but then saw the name sign outside with the two cats on it; Kaulitz-Trümper. Wait... what? When had that gotten there? When had they decided to use Gordon's name as well? Not that Bill minded, he really liked Gordon, it was just weird.

He tried to open the gate, but it was locked, so he rang the doorbell.

"Yes?" answered his mother's familiar voice; Bill nearly cried with relief.

"It's me!" Bill spoke into the intercom.

"What? Who?" his mother asked a bit confused.

"It's me, Bill!" he tried desperately; what was wrong with everyone today?!

"Oh Bill! I'm sorry sweetheart, I didn't recognize you! Did you forget your key?" she laughed, buzzing the door open.

Bill scrambled inside, staring around at the carport that had magically gotten there in the past few weeks that he hadn't been home, and then ran up the small path to the house where his mother had already opened the door.

"Bill...?" she asked a bit confused, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Mom, I don't know what's going on. There was an awful accident at the concert, but when I woke up everyone was gone. I went to our apartment in Berlin, but there was some weird woman there and I can't find Tom anywhere," Bill blurted out desperately, but his mother just stared at him.

"Who are you?" she asked, lowering her eyes at him.

"What?" Bill stammered; what this some kind of awful joke?

"Very funny," she said, somewhat annoyed; "I don't know what you think you're doing by coming here and pretending to be Bill, but it's pretty annoying, please get out," she gesturing towards the door, giving him an impatient glare.

"W-what?! But mom-" he tried desperately but she cut him off.

"Alright that's enough! I don't know what you kids are trying to play here, but it's really not funny. Now please leave, or I'll call the police," she rose her voice in anger, pointing towards the gate.

Bill didn't know what to do, but when his mother worked up a temper she scared him, so he decided to just leave; dejectedly he stalked towards the gate, taking another look back at his mother, still hoping she would say this was all a cruel joke, but she didn't. She walked into the house, shutting the door behind her. What in the world was going on here?

Not wanting to leave, Bill decided to investigate, and tiptoed back to the house and around it to the kitchen window from which he could hear altered voices.

"Those stupid kids!" Simone was yelling around while Gordon tried to calm her; "Seriously, one of these days..." she cursed under her breath.

"It's alright, dear, it was just a prank," Gordon tried to soothe her.

"Yeah but for a moment I really thought it was him... seriously, he had a voice just like Bill when he had been around that age; he even looked exactly like him back then," she shook her head, annoyed; "And since the kids are coming over today, I actually thought it was him. What kind of a mother am I who doesn't recognize her own son?"

Bill's mind was reeling; back then? Back when? What was she talking about?

While Simone and Gordon talked in the kitchen, Bill snuck into his own home, tip toeing to his room. Quietly he went in and turned on the light, his jaw dropping in astonishment; this was not the way he had left it last time he'd been here a few weeks ago.

The room had completely different posters hanging around; clothes scattered that he had never seen before, and shoes which were a few sizes too big for him; this couldn't possibly be his room anymore. Who the hell lived there?!

Carefully, he shut the door to make sure his parents wouldn't hear him, and then went over to the desk which hosted a seriously cool looking computer; that was also completely different than the old laptop he had usually had there.

Thankfully the computer didn't request a password and allowed him to view the desktop right away: the background picture was of a pen. What the heck?

Bill shook his head and looked over everything else there; normal folders, music. But then his eyes travelled to the bottom right corner of the screen; 9:18pm. 16.08.2015. What in god's name?!

Surely the computer was set on the wrong date; at least year wise. Yesterday had been the 15.08.... 2005. Yes, of course, that must be it. Bill nodded at his millisecond irrational thought that might have been able to explain the day he had had.

The only thing that would answer all his questions was the internet; Bill opened the window and googled his own name.

It took Bill various seconds to adjust to the pictures google showed him; none of that could possibly be real. There were a million pictures of a man that looked just like him, except he knew it wasn't him. He couldn't be; none of that had ever happened; none of those clothes or hairstyles had been his, not to mention the man looked quite a bit older than him. Maybe not by a lot... but ten years seemed like a reasonable age difference. Was it really the year 2015?

For long hours Bill sat in front of the computer reading articles and looking at pictures of Tokio Hotel and everything they had done in the past ten years; he could hardly believe any of that was real. It was way too cool to be real. They were living in L.A.!

"I'm just gonna leave my stuff upstairs!"

Bill froze as he heard someone approaching; was that him? Him from the future? His twenty-five year old self?

A second later the door opened and in walked the blond man from the pictures Bill had been looking at for the past few hours; twenty-five year old Bill Kaulitz.

The man froze in his tracks, staring in amazement at Bill, his expression probably just as shocked as Bill's.

"Who are you...?!" the blond Bill asked a bit hesitantly, looking him up and down.

"I'm Bill Kaulitz," Bill muttered stupidly, hoping against hope that his older self would recognize him.

"Um..." future Bill stepped into the room, shutting the door and locking it; "You're... Bill Kaulitz..." he repeated slowly, trying to comprehend the situation.

"Yes. I had an accident on stage yesterday... well... ten years ago; the lighting system fell on me and I passed out. When I woke up, I was in the empty concert hall in Berlin," Bill rambled nervously.

"I remember that accident... I was in a coma for over five weeks. Everyone thought I was going to die," his older self remembered slowly; "So... you supposedly come from the past?" he continued incredulously, coming closer to Bill to check him out suspiciously.

"I don't know... I don't know what happened to me. I went to our old apartment but there was a woman living there... and my - our mother didn't believe that it was me... or you," the more Bill talked, the more confused he got with his own words.

"Uh-huh," blond Bill nodded slowly; "Can you prove that?"

"How?" Bill had no idea how he could possibly prove something like that.

"I can see that you look exactly like me, but... that could be for a number of reasons. Tell me something only I would know," he demanded.

"Like what?" Bill had no idea what would be something only he himself would ever know.

"What's the most disgusting memory I have? The one I swore I would never tell anyone about, not even Tom," older Bill wanted to know, raising a challenging eyebrow.

"Um..." Bill tried to think of gross things that he really didn't ever want anyone to know about him; eventually he came up with only one; "The fact that the wheels from my scooter tasted like cherry chewing gum?" he crinkled his nose in disgust, while blond Bill laughed out loud. A few years ago Bill had lost a bet against Tom and had to lick the wheels from his scooter; it was by far the most disgusting thing he had ever done.

"Oh my god! You really are me!" he exclaimed excitedly, rushing over to him and staring down into his eyes; older Bill was quite a bit taller, he noticed absently.

"How did this happen? This is impossible!" he continued, still thrilled at the bizarre situation.

"I don't know, but it's somehow really cool. I saw what... you guys all did, it's great! I can't believe you really got famous all over the world, it's so amazing!" he finally allowed his thrill at the situation to surface.

"I know, right," his older self laughed, shaking his head.

Bill rambled on about how amazing he thought they were, while his future self told him a million things that had happened in the past ten years. Or in the future ten years, either way. They continued excitedly, one cutting the other off and stumbling over each other's words and questions until there was a knock on the door, and they both shut up abruptly.

"Bill?" It was Tom; he tried the handle, but Bill had locked the door earlier; "What's going on? Who's in there with you?" their twin asked suspiciously.

"We have to tell Tom about this," older Bill giggled quietly while he walked over to unlock the door, but younger Bill quickly jumped in his way.

"No, wait. What if he doesn't believe me?" he asked in panic; proving himself to... himself was one thing, but proving it to Tom was a whole other story.

"Don't worry, it'll be fine," his older self assured him, unlocking the door while shoving Bill behind it so Tom wouldn't see him right away.

"Tom, we need to talk," Bill said firmly, though younger Bill noticed he was trying not to grin.

"Who's in there with you?" Tom asked again, trying to see past Bill, but he was blocking his way into the room.

"Do you remember that accident, exactly ten years ago in Berlin?" Bill continued, ignoring their brother's earlier question.

"You mean the one where you ended up in a coma and when you woke up we-"

"Exactly that one, yes," Bill cut him off.

"How could I possibly forget?" Tom chuckled softly; "What about it?"

"Well... apparently... there was some weird bizzaro accident, because... as it turns out... well... um... the thing is..." blond Bill rambled, clearly not finding the adequate words for something like this; "I'm here!" he finally stated happily, throwing his hands in the air.

"...Right..." Tom replied slowly, clearly thinking Bill had lost it.

"No, what I mean is that... I am here. Not just me right now, but also me from back then," Bill tried again.

"The hell are you talking about, Bill?" Tom asked slowly.

Bill opened the door and pulled Tom inside; "There," he said with a huge grin, gesturing at the young version of himself.

Tom gaped at the young Bill, his eyes slowly traveling from one Bill to the other; "What the hell...?!" he muttered slowly.

"It really is me, I swear!" older Bill laughed excitedly, joining Bill and standing next to him with an arm wrapped around his shoulders.

Tom slowly approached them, eyeing Bill from head to toe; "Bill..." he said slowly, and then grinned; "Wow. Welcome to the future," he grinned wickedly.

"Really? That's all the convincing you need?" Bill asked suspiciously while his older self just laughed happily, clapping his hands together; apparently he still did that. Somehow the older Bill wasn't half as mature as Bill had expected to become in ten years.

Tom shrugged; "It's obviously you."

"How can you just tell? I didn't recognize myself that easily," older Bill raised a suspicious eyebrow at his brother.

"Maybe I'm just more attentive than you," Tom smiled an unusual smile that younger Bill had never seen on him before; it was almost... tender? If that could even be said about Tom.

"Anyway," blond Bill began rambling again; "This is so awesome! What are we going to do now? We probably shouldn't tell anyone about this. It would probably be best if you came to L.A. with us and stayed there until we figure this whole mess out," he nodded slowly, obviously already planning their close future together.

"But I need to go back home at some point," Bill interrupted his older self's planning.

"You obviously will, otherwise Bill wouldn't be here right now," Tom concluded logically, but Bill doubted if logic had anything to do with any of this.

"Of course, it makes perfect sense," his older self agreed; "You will probably go back in five weeks... which is when I woke up from the coma," he rationalized; "And until then you'll just hang out with us, and I'll tell you aaaaaall the things I really don't want you to do in the next ten years," Bill laughed again, giving him a random hug; wow that was weird.

"First, we should probably go downstairs and have dinner with mom and Gordon, they're probably wondering where we are," Tom interrupted the Bills' happy Moment.

"I'm starving, I haven't eaten anything all day," Bill complained, fully knowing that he couldn't have dinner with himself and his Family.

"We'll smuggle you something from the kitchen," his older self promised, just as their mother yelled for them to come down to dinner.

"Feel free to snoop through my closet," Bill grinned at him; "I know you're just dying to do that."

Bill laughed awkwardly; of course his older self would know that. As blond Bill closed the door, Bill heard Tom sniggering quietly; there was something different about Tom, but Bill couldn't quite place it.

While his older self and his twin were at dinner, Bill busied himself with checking out all the clothes in his closet; they were a bit too big for him (well not really, but for his taste), but generally they were really awesome; Bill loved them. They looked quite a bit different than the stuff he was wearing nowadays as well. He almost laughed; apparently his taste in clothes hadn't toned down at all. He remembered people telling him that he would grow out of the insane style he had, but obviously they had been wrong; Bill loved it when People were wrong about him.

Soon enough, older Bill and Tom returned from dinner, with a plate of vegetables rice and salad.

"Whaaat?" Bill whined staring at the lame Food; "I want pizza or burgers or something," he moped while poking around the vegetables.

"You know that we're vegetarian now, right?" his older self grinned at him.

"Ugh, what?! No way, gross. I want meat!" Bill stated firmly.

"Forget it," future Bill just laughed at him.

"Why are you vegetarian? You love meat!" Bill accused himself, frustrated.

"Yeah, but I also really like animals, and I think it sets a good example to be vegetarian," Bill shrugged.

"Whatever," Bill rolled his eyes; "I am never going to become vegetarian," he huffed, beginning to eat the race, which actually tasted quite good.

"Of course you will," Tom laughed; "It's even going to be your idea pretty soon."

"Ugh!" Bill groaned indignantly while his older self and Tom laughed.

Another few hours went by while the three of them conversed about the past, the present and the future, before their mother knocked loudly, telling them to be quiet because she and Gordon were trying to sleep.

That night he slept in his bed together with his older self; thank god older Bill had a large bed, or that would have been seriously uncomfortable.

"When did we get this huge bed?" Bill whispered into the dark room once they were all tucked in.

"Er... I don't know, like... almost ten years ago. Shortly after the accident, actually," his older self remembered.

"How come you guys moved to L.A.? Do you still come home a lot? Did we ever finish high school? Did I actually end up cheating on that French final? Do I get caught? Did we ever meet Nena? When did you get all those tattoos? How many have you got? And since when does Tom like tattoos on himself? He always used to say that he would never ever get one. Is one of you married, or has a girlfriend? Or more like you, since we both know Tom isn't. Do you have a driver's license? Does one of you have kids? I bet Tom has like ten by now or something... Do we still have dogs?" Bill rambled into the darkness while his older self giggled quietly next to him.

"Umm... we still have dogs, yes. We don't have kids. Neither of us is married either, and I don't have a girlfriend," he laughed quietly; "We moved to L.A. because things in Germany were just crazy... insane fans, we didn't have any private life anymore and stuff, so we just decided to move... and we did meet Nena!" he whispered excitedly, causing Bill to nearly hyperventilate; "I don't know why Tom changed his mind about the tattooing thing, but one day he was just like... 'yeah, let's get matching hand tattoos!' and I was all like 'awesome!' and so we did," Bill filled him in on the hand tattoos Bill had noticed earlier; he loved them. He couldn't believe that had been Tom's idea.

While his older self talked, Bill found himself wandering back to the fact that he didn't have a girlfriend; why not? He really wanted one, so how come, even after ten years of being insanely famous, he still didn't have one? He didn't really dare ask himself that right now though, maybe at a later Point.

Their whispering carried on for another few hours, neither being able to get any rest until dim light began to shine in through the edges of the curtains.

"Maybe we should try to sleep a little..." blond Bill yawned heartedly, and Bill agreed with him, joining him in the yawning.


	2. Chapter 2

Both Bills woke up to an incisive knocking on their door; "Bill sweetheart! Time to get up, it's already lunch time!" Simone called, rattling on the locked door handle; Bill didn't really lock his door a lot, but now that there were two of him here, it was probably best like that.

Older Bill promised to bring him some breakfast while he hurried out of the door, and Bill decided to go right back to sleep; somehow it was pretty awesome that there were two Bills now; he didn't even have to get up when his mother called him.

All too soon his older version waltzed back into the room, holding a large cup of coffee and a plate full of bagels; "Breakfast in bed?" he grinned down at Bill who gave him a tired glare.

"Oh don't give me that look, it doesn't work on me," he laughed, shoving the plate in Bill's face. With a sigh, he tried to sit up without knocking the bagels over and took the coffee from blond Bill.

"We're still addicted to this crap, huh?" he muttered as he sipped his coffee.

"Oh yeah. Coffee, cigarettes... we're total addicts," he grinned.

"Seriously? You actually smoke now?" he asked, slightly annoyed at himself.

"Oh don't act all innocently, mister, I remember the first time you smoked," he smirked; "My life is stressful... I need cigarettes and coffee, and possibly lots of energy drinks, otherwise I can't get through the day."

"There are certain things about my future I don't think I want to know," Bill muttered dejectedly.

"Yeah... there really are... and I'm going to tell you all of them," he grinned, making Bill want to punch him.

"Why? Isn't it better for people not to know their future?" Bill had seen plenty of those messed up time traveling movies; none of those ever ended well when someone tried to change stuff.

"Rubbish!" his older self shook his head; "You do realize that even if you go back and change a few things, then that's just how the future will be; whether it's better or worse, no one other than you will ever know anyway, so it really doesn't matter. And it's not like it's going to be like in Back to the Future or anything where one little event is going to change the entire world; you just watched too many Hollywood movies," future Bill assured him, but Bill still wasn't fully convinced.

"How could you possibly know that? You don't know more about time travel than I do," Bill shook his head.

"I'm ten years older than you, so I know more than you about everything," his older self grinned, and Bill rolled his eyes.

He was about to object, but Tom interrupted him as he came in; "Alright Bills, I convinced mom that we needed to go back to L.A. immediately because of some emergency rehearsal thingy, so let's get moving!"

"What? But but but... I still need to pack!" older Bill stammered horrified.

"Well hurry up then, I'm sure Bill will help you," he grinned at younger Bill before shutting the door.

"Alright then... let's pack," his older self nodded, opening the still packed suitcases.

"What are you going to pack, you haven't even unpacked yet...?" Bill watched as his older self began tossing clothes and shoes around randomly.

"Yes, but I need some stuff from here that I haven't worn in forever..." he muttered as he began running back and forth, carrying random clothes; "Hold this," he said as he placed an entire pile of shoes in Bill's arms. 

Bill had noticed the shoes earlier; they were quite different than the ones he used to wear. His taste sure had changed a bit.

"Why do you wear such insane shoes?" he asked, wondering how he even managed to walk with those without killing himself.

"Seriously? You out of all the people in the world are asking me why I do the things that I do?" blond Bill raised an eyebrow.

Bill laughed quietly; he hated it when people questioned him about his motives; he just did whatever he wanted, and that was the end of it. Obviously his older self felt that way too; "Sorry, that was stupid of me," he chuckled sheepishly.

Future Bill grinned; "Put 'em all in here," he held his suitcase wide open for Bill to dump all the shoes in; yup... hadn't gotten any tidier either.

Once they were done stuffing everything into Bill's two suitcases, they hauled them to the door from where older Bill had to take them on his own; "I'll talk to mom and Gordon in the kitchen while you slip out; Tom's already outside waiting for you," he grinned and waved as he went down the stairs to distract their parents, which had apparently gotten married a while ago; Bill was really happy for them.

Just like he had said, Tom was waiting outside for him where he got into their car; oh yeah... it sure paid off being rich and famous, Bill thought with a grin as he sat in the back of the rental Bentley; he hadn't even known these cars could be rented.

Tom went inside to say goodbye to their parents, and soon enough returned with Bill and their suitcases which they put in the trunk before blond Bill and Tom joined him in the car.

"So Bill;" future Bill began, turning around to look at him; "First time in L.A.?"

Tom chuckled, looking at him through the rearview mirror.

"Yes! But I already know I'm going to love it. I plan to live there in a few years," he nodded determined.

Bill and Tom laughed; "Yes you will love it! It's so warm and the city is amazing," older Bill quipped happily and began telling him all the amazing things he loved about L.A.. Restaurants, bars, clubs, and let's not forget all the amazing fashion stores, of course. Bill was really looking forward to it.

 

It was over 15 hours later when they were finally driving down the streets of L.A. towards Tom and Bill's apartment. Bill was exhausted from the flight, and torn between wanting to go out to explore the city, and sleeping for ten hours.

"This is it!" future Bill finally announced as he unlocked the door to their apartment; "Our dogs aren't here right now, they are staying with Georg and Valerie. We'll pick them up first thing in the morning! Usually we take them with us, but Pumba wasn't feeling so well when we left, so we decided to leave them here this time," he continued while he ushered Bill into the apartment.

"This place is so amazing...!" Bill gaped around at the flat; it was just like he had always wanted to live.

"Wait until you see our little music room," his older self grabbed him by the arm to give him a tour of the place while Tom dumped their entire luggage in the living room.

"And this is our room!" Bill announced happily, showing him around the large bedroom with the giant panorama window that displayed L.A., and the grand king bed standing in the middle on a small platform.

Bill was over the moon; his life in the future was so amazing he could hardly believe it; he couldn't wait to finally be twenty-five. Hell he couldn't even wait to finally be eighteen.

After his future self and Tom had shown him their apartment, they all decided to head out to an early dinner; to a vegetarian restaurant.

"Oh come on! You gave got to be kidding me," Bill grumbled; "We're in L.A. and we're going to a vegetarian restaurant? Do you know how many amazing steakhouses there are in this city?"

"Forget it, Bill," blond Bill ruffled his hair.

"Ugh, Bill! You know how much I hate that," he glared angrily, but his older self just grinned, pulling him into a tight hug; "Ow, I can't breathe," Bill complained to Tom who just raised an eyebrow.

"Stop making such a scene guys... I know it's hard for one of you to remain remotely unnoticed, and for two of you practically impossible, but try to keep it down just a little bit? If some hardcore fans see us, they are going to find it seriously weird that there's a younger version of you hanging out with us," Tom chuckled while he went over the menu.

"This veggie stuff sounds so gross," Bill muttered while he followed his twin's example with the menu.

"God, Bill, stop whining! Seriously, was I really this annoying?" older Bill asked Tom with a sour face.

"...you still are that annoying, Bill," Tom chuckled, moving out of the way when older Bill tried to swat him.

Younger Bill cackled evilly; "Ha ha, you're still annoying."

"Laugh it up, you're going to be me in ten years!" future Bill huffed, crossing his arms with a pout.

The waiter cleared his throat loudly, catching their attention; "What may I get you to drink?"

The food was surprisingly good again, and Bill nearly thought that maybe being vegetarian wasn't so bad after all. At least until they passed a hot dog stand on their way home.

"But I want a hot dog!" Bill argued firmly.

"Sucks for you because you don't have any money!" Bill stuck out his tongue.

"That is completely not fair! Your money is also mine; I made part of that so buy me the hot dog!" Bill countered.

"The money you made is loooong gone, now all the money is mine!" Bill said triumphantly.

"That's crap! You used the money I earned, so now I'm allowed to use yours too!" Bill swatted his older self's arm.

"Nuh-uh, because I was there as well and I also earned that money, so it was totally mine anyway!" Bill swatted him back.

"Will you guys shut up?!" Tom interrupted before Bill could continue demanding his hot dog from himself; "Geez, you guys are annoying, just shut up and lets go home or there will be no ice cream before bed tonight!" he said sternly, pointing in the direction they were going in.

Both Bills whined but said nothing, following Tom in silence.

"This is all your fault," Bill whispered to his older version.

"My fault? How is this my fault? You're the one who wants a hot dog, which is so not going to happen, by the way. Like ever," he glared back.

"Why not? You are such a pest. I want a hot dog!" Bill shot back quietly.

"Bill, Bill, that's enough," Tom shot them a dark look, at which both Bills just stuck their tongue out at him, and Tom rolled his eyes.

By the time they got home again, all disputes about hot dogs were long forgotten while Bill and Bill conversed about Tokio Hotel's last Album, which Bill had of course already listened to. Occasionally Tom quipped in with a comment, but mostly it was just Bill discussing it with himself while Tom listened in amusement.

After the ice cream that Tom had not taken away from them, and after future Bill smoked out on the balcony with Tom while Bill complained about it, both Bills went to Bill's room to catch up on some much needed sleep; Bill was suffering from jetlag, while older Bill commented suffering from a double jetlag, whatever that was supposed to be, due to the fact that he had had to travel twice in such a short time.

The next morning they all slept nearly until lunch time, at which point they ordered pizza. Vegetarian one.

"Oh give me a break!" Bill huffed; "You couldn't order salami for me?" he glared at Tom, who just gave him an innocent shrug.

"It's got cheese on it," he pointed out.

"It's got cheese on it," Bill mimicked in a squeaky voice that didn't sound remotely close to Tom's, while he glared at his ten year older twin.

"What's your problem? You like vegetarian food," Tom chuckled.

"What's your problem? You like meat!" Bill pointed out.

"Yes, but I can live without it," Tom smiled warmly; what was up with him lately? He didn't seem at all like the sarcastic, cool-wannabe that Bill remembered him as; what was so different about him all of a sudden? Had he really grown up that much? Unlike himself who was still a childish nitwit?

No, that couldn't be it; there was no way in hell that Tom was more mature than him. No, they were both still total idiots, just like always; it was something else about him. Something Bill couldn't really figure out. It was the way he treated him; there was something different about it. Something... gentler? Was that even a word to describe Tom?

Bill shook it off as they were joined by his older self; "Cheese pizza!"

"Yeah, sadly no salami," Bill muttered darkly.

"You'll get used to it. I promise," blond Bill grinned, nudging him in the arm; Bill just sighed; there was no way he could get used to not eating meat; it was just too delicious.

"Anyway, I talked to Ria earlier. She said she'd pick up the dogs on her way here," Tom informed them before they could start with the old discussion again.

"Great," older Bill said through a mouthful of pizza.

"Who's Ria?" Bill was quite sure he had never heard of her before.

There was a moment of silence while Tom and future Bill shared a weird look before his older self answered; "She's Tom's girlfriend."

Bill nearly choked on his pizza; "Whahatata what?!" he nearly yelled.

Tom laughed awkwardly; "Yeah..."

"Since when?" Bill asked in disbelief, looking back and forth between himself and Tom, expecting them to say 'punk'd!' at any minute.

"About five years now," Tom nodded slowly.

Bill burst out laughing; "Yeah right," he shook his head; "Good one, Tom."

Tom just smiled, almost sadly, while future Bill spoke up; "It's true. She's really great, and an awesome friend," he informed Bill who refused to believe that.

"There is no way in hell that I'm going to believe that Tom, Tom, has a steady girlfriend and I don't. That's absolutely impossible. I refuse to believe this," he shook his head vehemently; of course the future offered a few surprised for him, but this was just... no. It couldn't be that his whore of a brother had found love and he hadn't. After such a long time of wanting it, he still hadn't been able to have a relationship, while Tom, who had never ever wanted one, was going steady with someone for five years already? No way. Impossible.

He was still looking back and forth between them, waiting for them to say that they had just been kidding, but neither made an attempt to.

"For real?" Bill asked carefully.

"Yeah," his older self smiled with a nod.

"Why?" Bill asked in disbelief; "What kind of a girl would want to date Tom?" he asked, sticking his tongue out at Tom; of course he was just kidding, he knew how crazy girls were about his brother, but still.

He was expecting the usual punch in the arm from his brother, but it never came.

"I guess I just found 'the one', right Bill?" Tom smiled at older Bill who just smiled into his pizza while younger Bill was trying to understand the look between them; was he missing something?

"But you're in an open relationship right?" Bill came to the only logical conclusion; there was no way Tom would ever give up sex with strangers; no girl in the world could be that amazing for Tom.

"No, no open relationship. Just the two of us," Tom smiled that weird, warm smile that freaked Bill out; who the hell was that guy and what had he done to Tom Kaulitz?!

"Are you trying to tell me that you've only had sex with one person in the past five years?" Bill couldn't believe that. Five days, maybe... but not five years. Tom just didn't have it in him. Or did he...? He seemed so different... But... No way. Not Tom; that was physically impossible. Right?

Older Bill sniggered somewhere in the background while Tom just smiled patiently; "Yes, that's what I'm trying to tell you."

Could it be that he really had changed? How can one person change so much over... only ten years? Bill was really intrigued with this girl now, whoever she was, she must be really amazing and he really wanted to meet her.

"So when is... Ria? Coming over?" he asked curiously, still not fully certain that this woman even existed.

"She should be here in a few minutes, actually," Tom shrugged.

"It might be best if she doesn't see you... you know that would be sort of weird..." future Bill mumbled awkwardly.

Bill just nodded, still trying to understand what this strange world was that he had fallen into; "Yeah, probably."

"You can hide in our room," his older self gave him an apologetic look and helped him carry the unfinished pizza to their bedroom.

"She's probably not going to stay for long, don't worry," the blond assured him with a smile before closing the door. Bill sighed sadly; he was really curious about her.

It didn't take long before someone rang the doorbell, and Bill heard a loud "Pumbaaaaa! Baby!" which probably came from his older lips. A dog could be heard barking somewhere as well.

Bill slowly finished his pizza and then turned on the TV, really quietly, hoping that Tom's girlfriend(omg wtf) didn't stay too long. He had actually really wanted to meet her, but oh well... his future self was probably right; it wasn't good if anyone saw him. Least of all if it was someone who knew them well enough as to actually recognize him. On the other hand... his own mother hadn't even recognized him. Maybe if he didn't wear any make up, wore some baggy clothes, in case anyone here had any like that, and let his hair go its natural way?

Both his older self and Tom had a very... unique style to them, so if he just looked like a very normal person, maybe no one would recognize him?

Bill rummaged through blond Bill's closet, trying to find some clothes that looked sort of normal. Eventually he settled for worn out jeans and a t-shirt that looked as if it hadn't been worn in a long time; or maybe that was meant to look like that...?

He brushed his hair down, and made sure he didn't have any traces of make-up on; he looked really different like this. Of course hardcore fans could still recognize him, but he hoped that Tom's girlfriend would just think that they looked a bit similar; after all she hadn't known them back then.

Confidently he strolled into the living room, causing both future Bill and Tom to stare at him in alarm. The first one to greet him was a small, fat bulldog that barked happily, wagging its miniscule tail at him.


	3. Chapter 3

"Pumbaaaa!" Bill crouched down to the little dog that immediately jumped up at him, trying to lick his face. He knew that that had to be Pumba; there was no better name for the fat dog. He was so cute - Bill wanted to bite him. The dog was surprisingly heavy for such a small animal, and Bill ended up falling on his butt as the dog pounced on him again.

"Wow, he's usually not that friendly with strangers," the girl laughed in amazement.

"Hi," he greeted happily with an armful of Pumba; "I'm Bill and Tom's cousin." Yeah, that was safe.

"Oh! Hi!" she got up from the couch and came over to shake his hand; "Wow, you look so much like them," she laughed; "Tom! You never told me you had a cousin."

"Oh uh... yeah," Tom muttered awkwardly.

"What's your name?" Ria smiled at Bill as he waddled over to the couch, carrying Pumba.

Name? Great; Bill hadn't thought that far ahead yet.

"Arthur! His name is Arthur," his older version patted him on the shoulder as he sat next to himself, Pumba now in between both Bills.

"Oh... nice to meet you, Arthur," Ria smiled cheerfully and Bill returned the greeting; who the hell was Arthur?

While they chatted, Ria snuggled up against Tom who wrapped his arms around her, and Bill had a hard time not staring at the bizarre sight while she told him about her modeling career; Bill thought it was awesome; he would love to do something with modeling someday.

He was a bit distracted from the conversation due to the cuddling going on between her and his twin; he had never seen Tom cuddling before, and the fact that he had found such an amazing girl, but he himself was still alone, upset him a little. His older self didn't appear bothered by this in the least as he chatted and laughed with Tom and Ria, which bothered Bill even more; what had happened to him in the future? He had been so determined to find love at some point, preferably soon, but now here he was, ten years later, still completely alone. Why hadn't his future self found a girl like Ria?

Ria stayed for another half hour or so, after which future Bill decided that Bill needed new clothes because blond Bill's clothes just weren't all that adequate, and they would go shopping together; Tom said he would stay and work on their music because he didn't want to squander away his entire day with useless rubbish. Future Bill whacked him over the head for that comment.

"So who's Arthur?" Bill asked his older version while they tried on clothes in a store.

"He's a guy whose voice I dubbed in a movie," blond Bill laughed from the stall next to his.

"Seriously?" Bill asked excitedly; he was going to dub someone?

"Yeah. In the movie Arthur und die Minimoys; I provided his German voice," he told Bill, just as excited; "And the best part was that the female lead was dubbed by, guess who?! Nena!" he quipped happily and Bill nearly screeched.

"No way! Aaahhh! When is this going to happen?" Bill was finally done wriggling into his tight pants and pulled the curtain open to show his older self.

"In two years, and you are supposed to buy clothes that make you look less like you," blond Bill placed his hands on his hips, giving him a disapproving look.

"Ugh. Fine," Bill muttered and closed the curtain to change again; "So is Nena as awesome as I think she is?"

"Oh yeah," his older self narrated excitedly about what it was going to be like working with her.

The afternoon flew by in a heartbeat as his future self dragged him from one expensive store to the next, and Bill could shop to his heart's desire; L.A. was just amazing like that.

For dinner, future Bill and Tom took him to a restaurant at the Santa Monica Boulevard.

"Really? Can't we go to a normal restaurant and you guys just order a salad or something?" Bill grumbled under his breath as they entered the vegetarian establishment.

"We've been over this, Bill, forget it," blond Bill shook his head.

"Yes, Bill, we have but I still don't see why I have to eat cow food all the time," Bill replied politely.

"I swear if you guys start this again I'm driving home and leaving you both here. I know how paranoid you are about being left alone somewhere, so let's not go there," Tom interrupted sternly.

The Bills huffed, but said nothing as they were escorted to their table and handed their menus.

"Oooh, I want the veggie burger with potato wedges and salad!" blond Bill pointed into the menu.

"Oooh, I want the fried chicken with potato wedges and salad! Oh wait, there's no such thing," Bill glared angrily at his older self.

"For the love of god!" Tom growled angrily, slapping his menu on the table; "Neither of you is getting any dessert today!"

"Whaaat?" both Bills whined in unison.

"That's not fair, he started it!" blond Bill pointed an accusing finger at his younger self.

"No, you started it by coming here!" Bill accused his older version.

"I don't know these people," Tom said to the waiter who was suddenly standing next to their table, looking a bit awkward.

 

"So anyway," Bill said while munching on his... whatever it is that he was eating right now, he wasn't quite sure; "How's Georg and Gustl doing?"

"Good. They moved during the production of the new album," future Bill informed him.

"Man that's so cool... How's that coming along? Are you guys going on tour again soon?" Bill wanted to know everything.

"We just finished with the last one a while ago but we're planning another one, maybe in Asia? We don't really know yet, you know how crappy David's managing is," Tom chuckled.

"Really, it is?" Bill asked a bit surprised.

"Oh, you don't know that yet... yeah, we have the worst management ever," future Bill laughed while Tom nodded, rolling his eyes; "But don't worry about it."

Great, Bill thought; the future was very revealing. He wondered what other things he would find out during his stay here.

In the next days, Tom and blond Bill showed Bill around L.A. They went sightseeing, shopping, ate at amazing (vegetarian) restaurants, and walked the dogs up Hollywood Hills. The future was more amazing than Bill had ever thought it would be.

He began feeling completely at home, and future Bill and Tom had become like his new, or old, brothers; it was like having two twins instead of one. Which would actually make them triplets... whatever.

His older self was almost exactly like himself, and Bill found that he quite enjoyed that; there was nothing better than having someone who shared absolutely every opinion with him; except when it came to meat, of course. Tom on the other hand was completely different than Bill knew him to be; his twin had become far more... emotionally mature. Usually Bill had always been the sensitive, understanding, tolerant, etc. one of them, but the better he got to know his future twin, the more he realized that Tom had grown up a lot in that aspect.   
Sure he was still a total immature goat when it came to his behavior, just like both Bills, but when it came down to slightly more meaningful things, he had changed a lot. In the past nearly two weeks since Bill had gotten to the future, he hadn't heard a single raunchy remark about girls from his usually so dirty-mouthed brother; no, Tom didn't even turn around to look at them anymore. 

That Ria sure had changed him; Bill found that he liked it; not that he had been that bothered by Tom's ways before, but he had considered it to be somewhat gross and disrespectful towards girls sometimes, not to mention completely immature. Of course he was still of the opinion that the thing between Tom and Ria wouldn't last forever because no matter how much he might love his brother, he was convinced that deep down Tom was a player and would cheat on the poor girl sooner or later. Sooner or later Tom's true self would come back to the surface and he would get bored of her. Sooner or later that girl would be heartbroken.

"You know... I'm really impressed with the way you turned out. I always thought you'd grow up at some point, but this is a really nice surprise," Bill smiled at his twin while they cleared the table from dinner; blond Bill had gone off to take a shower, giving Bill some time alone with his changed brother. 

Tom chuckled; "Yeah, things are quite different now." Again Bill noticed that strange, soft smile that he still wasn't used to, but saw on his brother whenever he talked about something related to his love life.

"Ria's really amazing. I'm so glad that you found her. Was she your first girlfriend?" Bill almost felt awkward asking; it was still weird talking about Tom's girlfriend. And a little bit weird talking to Tom alone without his older self there; he really wasn't used to the new Tom yet.

"Yeah. First person I was ever serious about," Tom smiled again.

"Aw. What about me...? Did I ever get a girlfriend like that...?" Bill asked as casual as possible; he'd been meaning to ask for so long, but had always felt awkward and somewhat scared of what his older self might tell him.

"You haven't asked yourself yet?" Tom raised a surprised eyebrow while he placed the dishes in the dishwasher and Bill helped him by handing him plates.

"No, I forgot," Bill lied.

"Oh," Tom smiled softly, obviously knowing that he was lying; damn Tom for knowing him so well; "No, you never got a girlfriend."

"Oh," Bill just shrugged, trying to appear casual; "Why not?" Tom knew that he had always really wanted a girlfriend, so it didn't really matter anyway.

"Hm... I guess you found happiness elsewhere," he smiled that strange smile again; somehow Bill found it comforting. Of course what Tom had just said made no sense to him at all, but before he could ask, his older version danced into the room, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist.

"Aaah, that was so good," older Bill stretched, and Bill admired his tattoos; he had seen them a few times already, but no matter how often he saw them, he still had the urge to stare in awe.

"Is that gonna hurt a lot?" Bill asked warily, pointing at his tattoos.

Blond Bill grabbed a soda from the fridge and nodded; "Like crazy, you're gonna wanna die," he grinned.

"Great... that's just... awesome," Bill nodded with a sour face while the other Bill just laughed and patted him on the shoulder.

"It's so going to be worth it though," he smirked, taking a sip from his drink.

Bill already had a tattoo; he well remembered how painful it had been but, apparently, still wanted more; it was addicting. Tattoos were like Pringles; you couldn't just have one.

 

Once they were lying in bed that evening, Bill whispered to his older self; "Hey Bill?"

"Hmm?" he answered lazily, already half asleep; they had been lying in bed for at least half an hour already, but Bill hadn't been able to fall asleep; his mind was still wrapped in the conversation with Tom.

"How come you don't have a girlfriend?" he finally asked the question that had been bugging him since the first day he got here.

"Oh," blond Bill seemed a bit more awake now; "Well... it's complicated."

"Try me, I'm pretty understanding when it comes to you," he chuckled quietly and his older self followed his example.

"I don't really want to tell you because I'm afraid it might freak you out," he admitted in a quiet whisper.

"...and you think telling me that, calms my nerves?!" Bill tried to keep his voice down, knowing that Tom was sleeping next door.

"Sorry," future Bill giggled a bit; "I am in a relationship, if that makes you feel better," he continued softly; "I know how much you want one, Bill... and don't worry, it'll happen. And it'll be a million times better than you ever thought it would be."

"What? I thought you said you weren't?" Bill was totally confused now.

"Actually... I just said I didn't have a girlfriend," he shrugged softly, only adding to Bill's confusion.

"That makes no sense. Not even to me. As in me, as in you yourself. If you don't even make sense to yourself, there's something seriously wrong with you," Bill poked himself in the side, knowing how ticklish he was; it didn't fail to make his older self squeak quietly.

"Stop it!" he giggled hysterically, trying to push Bill's fingers away.

"So what does that mean, you're in a relationship but you don't have a girlfriend?" Bill insisted, beginning to get slightly nauseous as the only plausible explanation began dawning in his head.

"Um..." older Bill mumbled once he calmed down from the laughing fit; "I have a boyfriend," he finally whispered into Bill's ear, causing the hairs on his neck to stand up.

"Oh god," Bill mumbled softly; seriously? How could he not know this? "But I'm straight. I know everyone thinks I'm gay, but I'm not. We're not," he tried to rationalize with himself.

"That's true, we're not gay, but we're also not straight," his older self explained calmly; Bill was about to have a stroke.

"I'm not into guys though!" he tried to defend himself; why was he trying to defend himself against himself?

"I know, but you will be into this one guy. It's just him. He's different," blond Bill tried again, but Bill was unwilling to accept that.

"Are you kidding? Why?! How can he be that different? I like girls!" Bill stated, raising his voice a bit.

"I know that, Bill, but-"

"No no no no, I am never going to like guys," Bill cut himself off, shaking his head vehemently.

"Not in general you won't, but you're going to like this one guy," his older self insisted firmly.

"What guy? What's so special about him?" Bill couldn't imagine any guy being that awesome as to actually turn him gay; it's not like Bill had a problem with gay people, not at all, but he wasn't one himself. He had never been even remotely close to attracted to another guy before.

"He's... I can't explain it. He's the love of my life - of our life," he shrugged simply.

"But..." Bill tried to understand himself but it was difficult; it was just impossible for him to imagine.

"Don't worry about it, you'll find out pretty soon," he nudged him gently.

"How soon? How long have you been with him?" Bill asked suspiciously; it couldn't be that soon because he was very far from ready to get together with a guy.

"Almost ten years..." he could hear the smile from his older self in his words.

"Ten years?! So that's like... soon then?" Bill asked in total panic.

"Yeah, we got together a few weeks after I turned sixteen," older Bill remembered fondly.

"What?! That's too soon! I'm turning sixteen in less than a week!" he exclaimed horrified.

Future Bill giggled excitedly; "I know. And when you wake up from the coma... things are going to be... different than they were before," he said mysteriously.

"...what?" Bill squeaked, completely freaked out; "What the hell does that mean?!"

"It means that you will discover the person that you will hopefully spend the rest of your life with," he said cheerfully.

"Great... what's his name? I want to meet him. Here, I mean," Bill said drily.

"I can't tell you, and you can't meet him right now," his older self shook his head.

"Why not?!" Bill whined loudly.

"Shhushrrr! You're going to wake Tom up!" he laughed quietly; "You can't meet him now because he would recognize you as me, and... you would recognize him as... him.... Which is why I can't tell you his name either; you already know him," he finished with another giggle.

"Oh god, what?! Who?" Bill couldn't believe this; any of it. Soon he was supposed to get together with some guy that he already knew, and he would spend at least ten or more years with him?!

His older self just kept giggling next to him; "I'm not telling you."

"Ugh! Bill! Seriously! Do us both a favor here!" Bill grumbled moodily.

"You're not ready to know this yet, Bill," his future self shook his head.

"And you seriously think I'll be ready in a few weeks?" he asked doubtfully.

"Apparently," future Bill shrugged again.

"Ungh...." Bill mumbled; there was no person he could think of that he considered to be anywhere close to boyfriend material. The only person he could really think of in any connection to boyfriends was Georg; not that Bill had ever thought of him like that, but... he was the most probable option. Oh geez.

"Is it Georg? Oh my god, it's Georg, isn't it? Bill! How can you date Georg? What is wrong with you?!" Bill slapped his older arm a few times under the blankets while his older self laughed uncontrollably.

"It's not Georg!" he brought out between fits of laughter; "Though he does have something..." he chuckled thoughtfully.

"I know right? I think it's the hair," Bill nodded.

"He cut it," his older self lamented.

"Oh right, I saw that... bloody Georg. How dare he," he giggled quietly with his older self.

"Yeah, besides Georg has a girlfriend, Valerie," blond Bill continued; Bill had heard the name already.

"Seriously? How long have they been dating?" Wow... everyone seemed so grown up. Everyone had driving licenses and apartments and girlfriends. Or boyfriends. Ugh.

"About six years already," his future self mused slowly.

"Gosh... that's so long..." Bill muttered quietly; "Though not as long as you and whatever-his-name-is." Despite the fact that Bill was shocked at finding out he was... not straight, the fact that he would have a ten year relationship was just great; "So um... this boyfriend..." he continued awkwardly; "Any tips?"

"Oh yeah: be open minded," his older self chuckled quietly.

"The hell does that mean?!" Bill asked outraged; that couldn't mean anything good.

"Nothing, just... don't judge him based on who he is and what he did in the past," future Bill shrugged, far too casually for such a creepy topic, in Bill's opinion.

"Why, is he a serial killer?" Bill asked drily, making his older self laugh again.

"No, he didn't do anything bad, he's just... not really the person you ever expected to be with, that's all," he tried to calm Bill down.

"Of course not, I expected to be with a girl," Bill mumbled feebly.

"Not gonna happen," his older self laughed again before turning slightly more serious; "Just don't judge him, alright? He's been in love with you — us... for a really long time already, since we were pretty young; please don't ever forget that," blond Bill finished softly; his quiet, serious tone was a bit unsettling for Bill; and who the heck was it if they had known each other for long and it wasn't Georg? Who else had he known for long that could be in love with him? Maybe Andreas...? Andreas had always been very... not straight; was he in love with Bill? But he really didn't fancy Andreas... or any other guy for that matter.

"Right... Ok... So... am I gonna have sex with him...?" the thought was even more unsettling; he didn't really want to have sex with a guy.

"Nooo, we've been together for ten years and haven't had sex yet," his older self snorted sarcastically and Bill punched him in the arm.

"Ow! Fine fine. Yes, of course you will have sex with him... kinda soon, actually," he giggled again at the memory.

"Great," Bill groaned; "Am I a top or a bottom?" he mumbled sheepishly, feeling himself blush; he was glad it was dark and his future self couldn't see him while he burst out laughing.

"You're versatile, and enjoy both a lot. And so does he, surprisingly enough..." he added thoughtfully.

"Why is that surprising?" Bill was really curious who this guy could be; how could the love of his life be in his life already and he had never noticed it before?

"I don't know... he just never really struck me as the bottoming type," he mused with a chuckle; so probably not Andreas then. Ok that was just stereotyping. 

"Uh-huh... and I do strike you as that because I'm pretty, or what?" Bill snorted indignantly; he hated it when people judged him based on his looks; even if the judgment came from himself.

"No, but..." obviously his older self didn't have a good reply for this either; "I don't know. I guess it's easier for me to imagine myself in that... position, than him. Or at least ten years ago that was easier to imagine; now I'm good both ways," he grinned.

Bill laughed even though he wasn't at all comfortable with the thought of bottoming for some random guy; the whole idea of sex with another man actually freaked him out a lot, and the fact that he was supposed to be the passive part was even worse. He didn't want to have sex with some guy; especially not so soon with someone that meant nothing to him yet.

"Don't be freaked out," his older self curled an arm around his shoulder, drawing him close into a cuddle; "It's going to be really good, I promise; the guy is amazing in bed," he added with a wicked chuckled, causing Bill to blush again.

"Wonderful. At least one of us is..." he muttered sheepishly, making his older self laugh again.

"Don't worry about it, you can trust him; he doesn't care that you're not good in bed... as a matter of fact... he's going to love it," he whispered, gently kissing the top of his head.

Bill groaned in embarrassment, trying to fight the blush away, and snuggled up against himself; this was so weird. At least he didn't have to feel awkward cuddling his older self since he knew that future Bill loved cuddling just as much as he did; he felt really comfortable with himself. Too bad he couldn't just lose his virginity to himself - that would be so much easier. Wait... what?!


	4. Chapter 4

"And I want this... and this... and this as well... also this one here," Bill said slowly as he handed one clothing article after the other to blond Bill who nodded enthusiastically.

They were shopping for birthday presents for themselves; only a few days left before the big day. Bill and Bill were super excited because they wouldn't only be celebrating two birthdays like usual, but it would be all three of them. Which of course meant there was going to be a huge party, to which younger Bill needed to be made unrecognizable so no one would suspect anything weird going on.

"Oh this is so hot, you need this as well!" Ria joined them with a few other articles draped over her arms. Just like the Bills, Ria was an avid shopped, and Bill couldn't wait until he finally met her in the past; she would be so awesome to hang out with.

They spent the entire day putting together the perfect party outfit for Bill's 16th birthday, and searching for new platform shoes for older Bill; not that he needed them, but whatever.

Of course Tom hadn't joined them, but they decided to bring him back a Cinnabon roll; Tom liked the classic, with extra frosting.

"Alright guys, I'm going to take this home to Tom before it goes all cold. You guys finish shopping and I'll see you later, ok?" older Bill stuffed all their bags into the car.

Bill and Ria still wanted to shop for a necklace for Bill because Bill wanted his own jewelry; he really missed his from the past and didn't want to borrow any from his older self.

"Ok, we'll see you later," Ria waved.

"Take care of my little cousin," blond Bill grinned at Ria as he got into the car, and Ria flung her arm around Tom's shoulders with a laugh.

"I will! I'll bring him back in about two hours or so," she gave future Bill a suspicious wink, making Bill wonder if there was something going on he didn't know about. Were Bill and Tom planning some kind of surprise for him, and so they wanted him out of the house for two hours?

Future Bill drove away, and Ria led Bill down another street filled with a thousand shops.

They weaved through the crowds of tourists and random people, navigating from one store to the next, even after Bill had already found all he wanted; Ria was determined to show him around everywhere, which made Bill a little suspicious — was she trying to keep him from going home or something?

However upon their arrival at home, Bill found his twin and older self lazing around the living room; Bill didn't know what he'd been expecting, but at least something.

"Got everything? Let me see it!" blond Bill jumped up from the couch where he'd been seated with his laptop and snatched the bags from Ria and Bill.

Bill showed himself the few things he hadn't seen yet, and his future self decided to try them all on.

"I like it," blond Bill nodded in agreement, checking himself out in the mirror.

"Well duh, I bought it," Bill shook his head with a grin.

"That doesn't mean anything, you have a terrible taste," his older version rolled his eyes.

"Say what?! I look way better than you! I am so not looking like that by the way. Like ever," Bill shook his head at his older self; he looked weird. So not like himself.

"Pfffh, of course you will!" his older self countered; "And you should seriously start working out soon; it's annoying that I'm still this scrawny. I really wish I would have started earlier. So do that," blond Bill poked him in the stomach.

"Ah!" Bill jumped away with a whine; "Stop it! And ugh, you work out? I'm so not doing that..."

"You're going to regret that later!" his older self accused with a raised finger.

"Whatever. You know how lazy I am. It's not gonna happen," Bill shook his head in determination; if his older self wanted to work out, whatever, but there was no way he was going to do that.

"And you should really learn to play the piano. I want to be able to do that," future Bill mused slowly.

"Then why don't you learn it?" Bill rolled his eyes; he was so lazy.

"Well I don't want to learn it now... I want to be able to play it by now," his older self tried to reason.

"I don't want to learn it now either, I also want to be able to play it already!" Bill shook his head; "You are so lazy, Bill!" he accused.

"At least I go to the gym!" his older self argued back.

"Yeah... we'll see about that. When I'm your age I am so not doing that," Bill shook his head again; not gonna happen.

"Of course you will. Sooner or later you're going to be tired of being so flimsy and then you'll finally start working out! And if you would start right now, it would be so much easier," he tried with a hopeful smile but Bill just rolled his eyes.

"Forget it."

"Oh come on! What's the use of time travel if you can't make my future better because of it? You're supposed to be willing to learn from my mistakes and be eager to better your life," his older self said solemnly.

"Uh-huh, right. Cuz you were always so willing to learn..." Bill muttered drily.

"Yes I was!" older Bill placed his hands on his hips.

"No you weren't," Bill shook his head.

"Was too!"

"Nuh-uh."

"If you guys don't shut up I'm going to scream," Tom interrupted calmly from his place at the desk, not bothering to look up from his computer.

Both Bills had already forgotten he'd been sitting there; they quickly whatevered him and then older Bill dragged his younger self into his room.

"Okok, seriously, we need to talk," he smiled excitedly.

"It better not be about me becoming a better person... this whole vegetarian, working out crap is really annoying. When did you become so... so... what's the word..." Bill wasn't sure what word he was looking for exactly.

"Mature?" his older self tried helpfully.

"Yeah, no, that's definitely not the word I was looking for," Bill shook his head; "More like... ok not healthy either since you smoke like a bloody chimney... seriously, stop it; you're going to ruin my future lungs!" Bill accused as his older self opened the window to smoke.

"I am not. And besides, why should I quit smoking if you're so lazy that you don't even work out?" his older self retorted expectantly.

"Actually it doesn't matter. I'm just plain and simply never going to start smoking; solves that problem," he smiled triumphantly; "Just like I will never become vegetarian either. And I'm not doing the working out thing either."

"Why not? Those two are good things! I'm all for the not smoking part though..." blond Bill agreed.

"Whatever. What other things should I consider?" maybe his older self had a point; maybe there really were a few mistakes he could avoid. After all, how often did you have the chance to talk to your future self?

"Um... well let's see..." he mused slowly while taking a drag from his cigarette; "The first time you're in Thailand-"

"I'm going to Thailand?! That is so awesome! When?" Bill interrupted himself excitedly.

"Pretty soon, actually. Anyway... you're all going to go to this small restaurant which is going to have super delicious food; don't eat it unless you want to be sick for almost a week," blond Bill warned him, and Bill made a sour face; he'd do well to remember that.

"Also... see this crappy tattoo here?" he pointed to his left forearm; "I was high when I got it a few years ago; don't get it," he sighed with a chuckle; Bill had been wondering about it... it looked like rubbish, and he made a mental note to remember that as well.

"Right... avoid food poisoning and bad tattoos... what else?" he grinned.

"In about six or seven years you're going to have a really bad fight with mom. She's going to be really worried about the direction our life is going in, shortly after we move to L.A. and you're going to be really mean to her... don't do that. She's just worried about us," his older self nodded thoughtfully, and again Bill made sure to remember.

Bill and Bill conversed about things that Bill would still do in his life all throughout dinner, and Tom also threw in a few things.

"Let's also not forget that vocal cord surgery," said Tom through a mouthful of spicy tacos. Yes, vegetarian ones; Bill didn't even know something like that existed.

"What? Surgery?" Bill asked in panic.

"Yeah, you're going to lose your voice on stage at some point..." his older self sighed; "That was awful..."

"Oh great... on stage? Like in the middle of a performance?" he asked horrified.

"Yeah... you're going to be sick for a while and then get surgery, but everything is going to be fine, so don't kill yourself over it. Make sure not to talk, but... don't be as depressed as I was, ok? Everything's going to be fine," his older self pulled him into a tight hug while Tom smiled quietly to himself.

Bill nodded warily; that event scared him. Perhaps knowing so much about the future wasn't good after all; it was making him paranoid.

"I think I've learned enough about the future," he mumbled awkwardly.

Bill really wanted to catch a moment alone with Tom, but it was difficult since his older self was around all the time; the only moments he really had were when his older self was in the shower. Bill and his older self had agreed that young Bill would shower in the mornings, while older Bill showered in the evenings; it was just more efficient than one always having to wait for the other.

"Hey Tom?" Bill carefully approached the subject while he managed to catch his twin alone that evening while blond Bill showered.

"Hm?" Tom smiled as they put away the dishes from dinner.

"Do you always do the dishes?" Bill stalled, not really knowing how to get to the point.

"Usually you help me," he grinned.

"Oh right... hey um... I talked to Bill last night..." he began slowly, feeling completely awkward while he helped his twin with the dishes; "He told me about the whole boyfriend thing..."

"Oh, he did?" Tom didn't seem surprised at all; had Bill told him about their conversation?

"Yeah... who is it?" Bill deadpanned, hoping Tom would be more informative than Bill had been.

Tom smiled that weird sad smile Bill had seen on him a few times; "I think it's best if you don't know that right now."

"Ugh! Why not? What's wrong with this guy? Why don't you guys want me to know about him?" Bill asked exasperatedly.

"Hard to explain... I just think it's better if you wait and find out on your own," he shrugged, avoiding Bill's gaze; what was wrong with Tom? He was acting weird.

"I don't want to wait. You guys are making me really nervous," he insisted, not only because he was impatient, but because he truly was nervous about it; why didn't they just tell him?

"Bill... that guy... he really loves you. I don't know what exactly is going to happen when you get home, but please don't forget that," Tom said hesitantly, only fueling Bill's anxiousness about this whole thing.

"Why don't you guys just give me a concrete answer on this?" Bill asked angrily.

"Because you aren't ready to hear it," his twin said softly, again with that sad look in his eyes; was something bad going to happen?

"Whatever," Bill snapped, turning away to leave, and nearly knocking his older self over who entered the kitchen just as Bill stormed out.

"Wait, Bill! What's going on? Tom?" older Bill questioned, but Bill just walked away, slamming the door to his and Bill's room; stupid brothers of his — how dare they just keep this from him; it was his life too, after all.

With a deep sigh, Bill dropped down on the bed and stared up at the ceiling; what was so wrong about the relationship that he had? Who could he possibly be with that was so terrible they were desperate to keep it a secret?

He tried to think of all the people he had known for long; there really weren't all that many. Georg was taken, so it wasn't him. Gustav... that was just weird. Andreas... maybe but... no. Who else was there? Who was important in Bill's life? Who was there who'd been in love with him all this time but had never let him know?

Giving a loud exasperated groan, Bill got up again; he wasn't just going to be treated like a child; he would demand to know who the hell this guy was, and they were going to give him an answer even if it took all night.

Determined, Bill stalked back down to the kitchen, but paused outside the door as he heard his older self whine in annoyance.

"Bill is such an idiot!" future Bill accused angrily; "Why doesn't he just listen to me?"

"You can't blame yourself for being curious... I mean come on, would you really let this go?" Tom tried to reason.

"I know but he should trust my judgment... it's his own bloody judgment, why the hell doesn't he just trust himself?" blond Bill sighed heavily.

"It'll be fine Bill, don't worry about it," Tom's voice was soft and low, and followed by a long silence.

Carefully Bill pushed the door open and peeked inside to see why they were suddenly so quiet. For a moment Bill thought he would pass out; his older self was leaning against the kitchen counter, lips upon Tom's.

Bill stepped back into the hall, letting the door swing shut in silence; what in god's name...? His mind was spinning out of control, causing him to nearly fall over from shock; what the hell was that supposed to mean? There was no way that that meant...? No, of course not. That couldn't be. They were... no. Surely he had seen wrong; they were definitely not kissing.

With a trembling hand, Bill pushed the door open just a few inches to see them again; they were still doing it. Blond Bill had his arms loosely laced behind Tom's neck while their lips were locked in a tight kiss.

His stomach was jumping up and down, and he quickly closed the door again before the sight made him scream in terror; what the hell?! He stumbled back to their room and into the bathroom, locking it behind himself. What in the world was happening? This couldn't be true. It was absolutely impossible; they were twins. That was absolutely wrong on every level.

After a few minutes of sick panic, Bill decided to crawl into bed, knowing that sooner or later his older self would show up, and he was in absolutely no condition to face himself right now. Shakily he climbed into bed and pulled the covers over his head; out of all the confusing thoughts and feelings, the one that bothered him the most was the fact that Bill had told him that the person had already loved him for a long time; that couldn't be Tom though. Tom didn't love him... not like that. Tom didn't love anyone like that. Except maybe Ria. What about Ria?!   
She was supposed to be Tom's girlfriend. Of course... there was no way that there was anything going on between himself and Tom. No... that kiss had just been... a random... casual kiss between... twins... that didn't mean anything... it wasn't romantic or anything at all, just... a meaningless kiss. Yes, Bill's mind insisted; that's all it was. Tom was definitely not the man Bill had been talking about. There was definitely nothing going on there. Tom was with Ria, and Bill was with some guy that Bill really didn't want to know anything about.

"Bill?" older Bill whispered after slipping into the bed; "Are you asleep already?"

Bill didn't answer, hoping his older self would buy that he was sleeping; he couldn't say anything right now. His stomach was twisted into painful knots, and he was completely confused, not to mention scared out of his mind.

His future self didn't seem too bothered as he switched off the lights and curled close to him, wrapping his arms around Bill. Bill gave a, hopefully, sleepy-sounding groan and shifted a bit; he tried to keep his breathing steady so his other self wouldn't notice his distress. Apparently it worked, because future Bill made no further attempt at talking to him and eventually fell asleep.

Unfortunately Bill had no such luck, and remained awake for many hours, convincing himself that that kiss had meant nothing, and that that was just something weird that he and Tom did as grownups.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning Bill crawled over himself, trying not to wake the other Bill as he climbed out of bed. He slept terrible, having been plagued by twisted dreams all night; this whole thing was so awfully messed up.

Gingerly he stepped into the shower after shedding his clothes, and let the water rush over his face. What was he going to do? Should he act as if he hadn't seen that last night? Talk to them and demand to know what was happening? Was he just being totally crazy and there was nothing going on at all? But if there was something going on, how could he approach the subject? What if he was wrong and then they both thought he was totally sick and crazy for thinking that?

With a quiet groan, Bill stepped out of the shower and dried himself off before tiptoeing to the kitchen where his older self and Tom were about to have breakfast.

He peeked into the room, half expecting to see something he didn't want to ever see again, but neither of them were doing anything suspicious - Tom was pouring coffee into mugs while Bill's head lay on the table, half asleep; apparently in ten years he would still not be a morning person.

"Morning Bill," Tom greeted him with a smile; "Coffee?"

"Morning. No thanks," Bill mumbled, sitting down next to himself, who cracked an eye open and smiled sleepily when Tom placed the mug in front of him.

"You look a bit tired, s'everything alright?" blond Bill asked once he managed to lift his head to take a sip from his coffee.

"Yeah fine," Bill mumbled again, feeling completely awkward.

"You sure? Cuz you look like you just came back from a six month tour," Tom chuckled a bit.

"That's not my fault, Bill was snoring all night," Bill defended himself, not wanting to tell the truth.

His future self gasped loudly; "I was not! I don't snore!"

"Like a walrus," Bill insisted even though it wasn't true; so far his older version had turned out to be a very quiet sleeper; he tossed around like a whale out of water, but he didn't snore.

"That is a lie! I refuse to believe this," blond Bill shook his head while Tom sniggered quietly; "Tom! Tell him that's so not true," he demanded.

"Of course it isn't. You're a very quiet sleeper," Tom tried to pacify him with a grin, and Bill wondered if Tom knew that because they slept in the same trailer while on tour, or for some other reason.

"Georg is the one who snores," blond Bill nodded firmly, and Bill remembered that; he had slept in the bunk right above the bassist while on tour and always needed earplugs.

Thankfully that had been enough for future Bill to drop the subject, and they moved on to today's activities; Tom and Bill had to do something band related that Bill wasn't allowed to accompany them with, so he would be spending his day in the apartment, babysitting Pumba.

Without his older version and Tom, Bill was rather bored and did nothing all day but laze around and watch movies that would come out way later than the year he came from. The ones he wanted to watch the most were the three Hobbit movies; he was about to be the first person ever to see those; technically seen. Bill had always been a movie enthusiast, and there were so many that were on his 'to watch before the past' list, he didn't even know where to begin. He had only seen one so far; Arthur and the Minimoys, together with his older self because both Bills were determined this would make the job easier for Bill once the time came. His older self also really wanted him to watch the Twilight movies that Bill had never heard of; apparently they didn't come out until 2008 or something, but his older self said that Bill would like them and they needed to watch them together at some point.

So Bill spent his entire day watching the three Hobbit movies and cuddling with Pumba, until his twin and his twin's twin finally came back home; Ria was with them - and so was pizza.

"Hey Arthur!" Ria greeted happily dropping down next to him on the couch; "Have you been lazy all day?"

"No. I have been watching the Hobbits and playing with Pumba - we were very busy," Bill grinned happily while Ria laughed.

"We got you some pizza," Tom joined them on the couch, placing the pizza on Bill's lap.

"Let me guess, it's veg-"

"Shut up and eat," Tom cut him off, rolling his eyes.

"I'm sooo tired," Bill heard his older self complaining somewhere in the background, but he wasn't really listening because he was busy watching Tom and Ria who had gotten back up; now that Bill really thought about it, they didn't seem as lovey-dovey as he would have expected lovers to be.

"I need to get going guys, I'll see ya'll soon!" she waved back at Bill who was already eating pizza and just nodded with a quick wave.

Fascinated, he watched as Ria kissed Tom on the lips; it was a quick chaste kiss that didn't come anywhere near what he had witnessed from his twin and older version the night before. Was Tom cheating on Ria...? With... Bill? No. That was just wrong. Bill shook his head, trying to straighten his thoughts again.

"Did you have fun with Bill, my little angel?" blond Bill cooed at Pumba once Ria was gone. The fat dog wagged his tiny tail, jumping up and down with happiness that all owners were back home now.

"I also had fun, thanks for asking," Bill scoffed through his pizza; "I was dead bored all day. Why do you guys have to work so much? I also want to do something," he complained.

"You can't do anything other than sit here and look pretty," his older version grinned as he came over to the couch with Pumba.

"Well at least I'm prettier than you because you look like crap," Bill said thoughtfully.

"Excuse me?!" his older version shrieked loudly; "I happen to look great!"

"No you don't, you look like rubbish. I'm so not looking like that. And you should shave, you look weird," Bill insisted, eyeing himself critically.

Future Bill smacked his head; "Shut up you dweeb. You are so going to look as amazing as I look right now, so shush it," he said with a firm nod.

"Uh-huh, yeah, no. Besides you could at least let me go to the studio with you guys. I really want to see how you're working now," he grumbled, ignoring the fact that he was supposed to look like his older version in ten years.

"Too risky. Everyone there has known us for ages. Imagine how Georg and Gustav would react if they saw you," Tom shook his head as he joined them on the couch again.

"But I don't want to sit here all day watching movies!" Bill whined; who knew how long he could still stay here, so he wanted to see as much as possible.

"Maybe we should take a few weeks off..." blond Bill mused slowly.

"Yes! Take some time off and let's hang out," Bill agreed immediately.

"Alright, I guess we can talk to David about it tomorrow... I'm going to go to bed right now, Bill was killing me all day with his constant 'but I want it like this, but I want it like that'," Tom commented, getting up again while blond Bill stuck his tongue out at him.

"I just want our songs to be good... and yeah, we can tell him we want it as a birthday present," he grinned enthusiastically; only two more days till their birthday.

"Awesome! So what are we doing when you guys have time?" Bill wanted to start making plans.

"I'm going to sleep," Tom stated firmly, heading towards his bedroom.

"You're such a bore," older Bill rolled his eyes, but Tom just smiled before closing the door to his bedroom with a quiet goodnight. Bill looked back at his older self, trying to understand the look between them; those looks were not ones that he and Tom from the past had ever shared - there was definitely something weird going on here.

Bill and his older version still discussed their plans while they sat on the couch for another ten minutes until Bill was done with his pizza, and then they also headed to their bedroom, together with Pumba.

 

Sadly the next day passed similarly for Bill, except now he watched Twilight.

"Aw, Bill!" his older self complained loudly once he and Tom arrived in the evening; "I wanted to watch them with you," he whined.

"Well you're never around," Bill defended himself.

"Still, how could you just watch that without me," the blond pouted.

"Oh come on, we can watch them again if you want," Bill clapped his hands enthusiastically; he had loved them and if his older self wanted to, they could watch it again.

Older Bill mimicked his clapping happily; "Alright! It's so fun right? I just love it. It's so romantic and-"

"You guys are so pathetic. That story is so bad," Tom grumbled while he began discarding the take-out boxes that they had brought home for Bill for dinner.

Blond Bill gasped in his dramatic fashion; "You did not just say that. Bill! I'll hold him while you tickle him!" his older version ordered, approaching Tom.

"Stay away from me," Tom said alarmed, backing away from both approaching Bills; "I'm serious. You've got that crazy look in your eyes. AH!" Tom bolted from the room just as blond Bill was about to pounce on him.

"Get back here you coward! I'll get you for that!" Bill heard his older self yelling and laughing while his twins disappeared somewhere into Tom's bedroom.

Under normal circumstances Bill would have laughed his head off at Tom's yelling, laughing and cursing, but right now the whole situation just made him somewhat uneasy. Should he follow them? And if he did, what would he find?

He could still hear their laughter from Tom's room while he slowly approached the ajar door and peeked inside nervously. On the bed lay Tom on his back, with Bill's older self triumphantly sitting on top of him, grinning down at him.

"Do you give up?" blond Bill demanded happily, his hands very close to Tom's sides, threatening to tickle him again.

Tom laughed, turning his head to spot Bill standing in the doorway; "Yes," he said softly, smiling at Bill in that weird way before turning his head back to Bill's older version; "I give up."

Bill looked back and forth between the two, who also looked back and forth between each other and Bill; this was probably one of the most awkward situations Bill had ever been in, even though he had no idea why.

With a soft laugh, future Bill quickly jumped off Tom, grinning at Bill; "We always win," he winked before exiting the room.

Bill gave a short laugh, even though it was more out of politeness than anything else; what the hell did that mean?

Slowly Tom rolled off the bed, fixing his clothes; "What?" he smiled faintly, raising an eyebrow at Bill's obvious staring.

"Nothing," Bill mumbled, not really knowing what to say.

Tom frowned slightly; "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, no, everything's good," Bill nodded quickly, turning to leave from the uncomfortable situation. 

"Goodnight then," Tom gave him another one of those tender smiles that caused Bill's stomach to twist, and he quickly shut the door with a nod so he wouldn't stare at it.

There was something seriously different about Tom, and it scared him. It scared him because he liked it; there was something captivating about Tom's behavior, and Bill wanted to get to know more of it.

 

The next evening, Bill clapped happily while his older self and Tom blew out the candles on their huge birthday cake. So far no one at the small party had noticed that Bill was... well, Bill, even though a lot of them commented on how similar he looked to the older twins.

"Why have I never heard of you guys having a cousin before?" Gustav asked for the tenth time that evening, obviously very suspicious.

"Give it a rest, Gusti, you don't know everything about us," blond Bill laughed, shoving a plate with cake at Gustav.

Bill also enjoyed some cake and watched people dancing, drinking and laughing; it reminded him a lot of the parties they had had back in 2005 - except with a lot more alcohol.

"Stop drinking so much," his older self grabbed the drink from his hand for the third time that evening.

"Ugh, Bill... I know what you were doing when you were my age, so stop being such a prude," Bill rolled his eyes at himself.

"You're only 15! I mean 16," he quickly corrected himself with a grin; "And in America you aren't allowed to drink for another five years," he whispered.

"Like that ever stopped you from drinking," Bill grumbled; "Stop babysitting me, damnit," he snapped at himself but his older version just crossed his arms.

"I'm responsible for you," he said firmly, obviously trying to be intimidating, but Bill just laughed.

"Oh give me a break. I obviously turned out perfectly fine, so cut it out," he snatched the drink from his older hand and ran away into the crowd with Bill cursing behind him.

Finally Bill found a safe spot where he could hide from his older self while he drank and enjoyed some more snacks; his solitude didn't last long because he was joined by Ria.

"Having fun?" she grinned, stealing a bit of cake frosting with her finger.

"Yeah, it's great," he replied with a large smile; "Where's Tom at?" Bill had seen him and Ria dancing earlier; unlike all the other times he remembered having seen Tom dancing however, he wasn't groping around on her or making out as if no one were watching - Tom was weird like that now. So... decent.

"He went out on the balcony to smoke," she shrugged, gesturing towards where the balcony might be.

"I think I could also use some air," Bill excused himself to go look for his twin; maybe with all these people around he could actually find a moment alone with Tom without his future self being around.

"What are you doing all alone out here?" Bill smiled as he stepped out onto the balcony where Tom was sitting on a chair, smoking.

"Just enjoying some quiet time. I'm actually pretty tired already..." he mumbled, looking at his watch. Bill did the same only to find that it was barely past 2am; since when did Tom get tired so early? From what Bill could remember, Tom partied till the sun came up.

"Oh. Are we going home soon then?" he asked while sitting down opposite his brother.

"Probably... you want some?" Tom asked, holding up the cigarette.

"Seriously? Bill just tried to take my drink away, and you're offering me smokes? You're a bad influence," Bill grinned, taking the offered cigarette.

Tom laughed; "Remember when we tried this the first time? How old were we, like... 11 or something?"

"Yeah... that was the same day we stole some beer from Gordon's car," Bill laughed, well remembering the day.

"Oh right... man, that tasted gross," Tom chuckled, reaching for his bottle of beer; obviously he didn't think so anymore.

Bill took a soft drag from the cigarette; he didn't even know why he was smoking right now, it just felt comfortable; "It really was... I still don't like it," he mumbled lamely, watching his twin drink.

"You will eventually," he chuckled once he removed the bottle from his lips.

Bill just made a disgusted face, handing him back the cigarette; "You know... I never really felt that young until I came here... I don't know, I always sort of felt pretty grown up already, but now... seeing myself ten years later..." Bill ranted slowly, not really knowing where he was going with this.

"I remember that... I always felt so smart and grown up when I was... what, 12?" Tom chuckled, shaking his head; "I slowly came to realize that I'm far from grown up even now, at 26," he smiled softly, taking a long drag from his cigarette.

"That's true. You and Bill are seriously immature... it's really pathetic," Bill stuck his tongue out, expecting a sarcastic reply and a punch in the arm, but instead Tom just smiled gently, nodding.

"I doubt that will ever change," he chuckled softly, handing him the cigarette again.

Bill watched him a moment, trying to read that smile; what did it mean? What was going on inside Tom's really strange head?

"You're so different," Bill mumbled absently, twirling the nearly finished cigarette in his fingers.

"I'm not. I was always like this, I just never showed it to you," Tom replied quietly; despite his smile, there was an unusual seriousness about him that Bill couldn't understand at all.

"Why not?" It wasn't like Bill didn't like the other Tom too, but there was something about this one that was just very enthralling.

"I didn't think you would be alright with it," he admitted softly, taking back the cigarette Bill held out to him.

"You thought I would prefer the shallow whore?" Bill raised an eyebrow and chuckled.

Tom joined him with a laugh; "Yes. I thought it would be easier that way," he shrugged, squishing the cigarette butt in the ashtray.

"What would be easier...?" Bill asked confused.

"What are you guys doing?" blond Bill interrupted whatever reply Tom was about to give him.

"Nothing. Tom was just smoking and I was totally just watching," Bill smirked at his older self.

"Of course," future Bill rolled his eyes with a smile; "If I smoke in the future, I blame you, Tom."

"You always blame for everything anyway," Tom chuckled, shaking his head; "I'm tired. Are you guys ready to go home yet?"

"I'm ready!" blond Bill said immediately, not looking tired at all.

"Yeah, I guess me too," Bill shrugged; he wasn't actually all that tired, but whatever - if they wanted to go home, he wasn't going to stay here all by himself.

And so, a good hour later, they finally arrived at home. It had taken them a while to get away from the party and say goodnight to all their friends, but now they had finally made it, and Bill was actually beginning to get tired.

"Woah, where you going Bill," his older self pulled him back into the kitchen when Bill had wanted to go to their bedroom; "We're not quite done yet," he grinned.

"What?" Bill asked confused.

Tom came back into the kitchen with a small chocolate cheese cake that he placed on the table in front of him; the cake had Bill Tom Bill written on it, with three small candles.

"Aw, you guys," Bill clapped happily, pulling both his brothers into a hug.

"We thought since no one at the party was allowed to know it was also your birthday, we'd just celebrate a little here - just the three of us," his future self beamed happily, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug.

There it was again; that weird look between his brothers as they stood there in a tiny circle hugging each other. The look only lasted for a second before they pulled apart again and sang happy birthday for each other.

"Alright, make a wish everyone!" blond Bill cheered once they were done.

After a second during which they all wished for something silly, they blew out the candles together and both Bills clapped in their typical fashion while Tom began to cut the cake.

 

They stayed awake for another good hour before they decided to call it a night at nearly 5am.

"Goodnight Bills," Tom smiled as they parted ways into their separate rooms.

"Goodnight Tom!" both Bills said in unison; it was something that they began doing on their first night together, and somehow they had kept it.

"I can't believe I'm finally 16! Not that I feel any different, but still," Bill said to his older self while they climbed into bed.

"I know. And it's so awesome that we had a triple birthday," his older version replied happily, lying down next to him.

"Yeah, that was just awesome," Bill agreed with a hearty yawn, snuggling close to himself the way they always did; he was definitely going to miss this. Bill really loved cuddling, and now he had finally found someone who loved it as much as him, but... it was himself, so once he returned to the past, all this would be... history.

Bill was already drifting off to sleep when his older version suddenly slipped out of bed so quietly he barely noticed it. Did Bill have to pee again? He had just gotten up about ten minutes ago for that.

A little surprised, he noticed that Bill didn't go into their bathroom but out into the hall instead; curiously, Bill got up and followed him. When his older version knocked quietly on Tom's door, Bill began getting a bit nervous - what in god's name was he doing here in the middle of the night? His future self slipped into the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

Bill stood in the silent, dark hall, not knowing what he should do or think; what were they doing in there? His already twisted mind began providing him with all sorts of twisted answers and images that he really didn't want to believe; it couldn't be that there was something weird going on, right? They were brothers after all.

After a few minutes, paranoia began to drive him crazy, and he tiptoed towards the door to listen, but all he could hear was quiet music; what the hell were they doing in there?!

He really wanted to go in, but what if they were doing something weird... like kissing or... no, they couldn't be, that was just wrong. But what if they were? He had to know. But if he walked in and found them... doing something like...

With a determined breath, Bill opened the door.


	6. Chapter 6

Bill pulled the door open, only to find his twin's lying in bed, half asleep.

"Bill," his older self murmured groggily, smiling up at him; "Hey, I thought you were already sleeping."

"Oh," Bill said stupidly; "No... I heard you getting up," he mumbled, feeling like an idiot; how could he have thought that his brothers would be like that? That was just sick.

"Aw, come cuddle with us!" blond Bill stretched his hand out and Tom chuckled quietly.

Bill laughed sheepishly and crawled into bed with them; all hail grand king sized beds.

As he nestled between his older self and Tom, he almost laughed at himself; how could he have thought something so ridiculous and stupid of himself? Of course there was nothing weird going on between his brothers, that was completely silly. Not in a million years would he be desperate enough to get involved with a whore like Tom. He was probably just messed up due to this whole time traveling thingy, Bill concluded sleepily. Right before falling asleep, he wondered what song it was that played quietly in the background; he had never heard it before, but recognized himself singing it. Ich will da nicht allein sein. Lass uns gemeinsam in die Nacht.

 

"You know Tom," Bill began the next morning while his older self was showering; "I like this new you. It's nice to know you'll still cuddle me every once in a while. I really miss that... remember when we were kids and you used to do that all the time? How come you stopped?" he asked, nibbling on a piece of Nutella toast. 

Tom chuckled quietly; "I guess I became too cool for hugs. It was the whole teenager phase... you know how that is," he grinned.

Bill laughed a little, not entirely certain what Tom meant; "And now you're over it? You're not too cool for hugs anymore?"

"No. Now I'm just way too cool to care about being cool," he smirked, reminding Bill a lot of the younger Tom.

Bill had to laugh again; this Tom truly was completely different. What had happened to make him like this? How can a person change so radically?

"Anyway, I spoke to David last night at the party, and he agreed that we could use a short break. Georg and Gustav are also all for it, so we're taking the next two or three weeks off to spend some time with your favorite little cousin," Tom announced with a cheerful smile, right before Bill walked in.

"Yes! Bill and I decided that we would be going through all our music and general life experiences, to make our career easier," blond Bill announced while taking a drink from the fridge, just like every morning; "And we're also going shopping. My poor 16 year old self needs some serious advice on clothes," he added firmly, giving Bill a disapproving look.

"I don't need advice from you," Bill snorted indignantly; "We already agreed that I'm way hotter anyway."

"We did not!" future Bill gasped loudly, placing his hands on his hips.

"Of course we did," Bill concluded.

"Nu-huh! You look like a 16 year old kid!" he complained grumpily.

"I am a 16 year old kid," Bill reminded him drily.

"Still. I'm hotter."

"You wish."

"I can't take this so early in the morning, please shut it," Tom grumbled, placing his hands over his ears.

"Tom!" both Bills yelled in unison; "I'm hotter, right?"

Tom looked back and forth between them with a slightly freaked out expression; "No comment," he said slowly, backing away from their expectant stare.

"Chicken!" blond Bill accused; "We all know the truth-!"

"That I'm hotter," Bill finished with a satisfied grin.

"Ugh. Pumba, help me," Tom mumbled at the dog who came into the kitchen at that moment.

 

The rest of the day passed with cooking pasta and going over all the concerts that Bill and Tom could remember from the past ten years. They showed him a million videos from behind the scenes, and told him of all the amazing awards they would win; Bill was quite certain he would never be able to manage everything they did — it was crazy. Not ever had he dreamt that things would turn out this huge — it was almost too much for him to grasp. There were a million articles about them, many of which were great, and many of which he didn't even want to read because they were so awful.

"Don't worry about all the nasty things people will say, you'll get used to it. Trust me, after a while you won't even see it anymore," older Bill assured him with a warm smile; "Just keep in mind, the more people love you, the more will hate you — things need to be balanced out somehow after all," he finished with a laugh.

"Uh..." Bill mumbled, not knowing what to say to that; he didn't want anyone to hate him, but... Bill was probably right... there probably wasn't much he could do about it.

While Tom and Bill prepared dinner, Bill was still sitting in the living room, checking out youtube videos of themselves; he had already watched for a few hours, but there were so many he couldn't even begin to see an end. Not just interviews and concerts, but also a million fan videos with random music and images and-

Bill nearly choked on his own breath as he stared at a video on the right column with recommended videos. Bill & Tom — Real Twincest...? What in god's name was that supposed to mean? Twincest? That word couldn't possibly mean what Bill thought it meant, right?

Hesitantly Bill clicked on the video, anxiously waiting the two seconds until it started playing. It only took him a few seconds to realize that none of the seriously disturbing images were real; it was all photoshopped by some insane, seriously sick fans.

Shakily he let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. The world was so messed up — what was wrong with those people?! He scowled at the sick images of him and his twin in very questionable poses, cursing his fame.

"Dinner's ready!" his older self called, sticking his head into the living room, causing Bill to slam the laptop shut so hard he was afraid he might have broken it.

Future Bill raised an eyebrow; "What are you watching?" he asked with a mischievous smirk.

"Nothing," Bill replied a little too quickly, pushing the laptop aside; "I'm starving, it smells great, I'm really hungry, it smells really good, what are we having? I'm really hungry," he ranted on his way into the kitchen.

"Right..." his older self said suspiciously; "Were you watching porn on my computer?" he asked with a grin.

"What?!" Bill shrieked, blushing furiously; "Of course not!"

Tom burst out laughing as they came into the kitchen; "What? Who's watching porn?"

"Bill is!" blond Bill chirped happily.

"I am not!" Bill insisted, not being able to stop blushing; this was just awful. Although it was probably better they thought it was porn, than if they knew what he'd really been watching.

Tom gave a fake gasp; "Bill, you naughty boy, I didn't even know you enjoyed porn," he grinned wickedly.

"You have a really good point there, Tom, I don't enjoy porn... Bill! What were you watching? I know it wasn't porn, so what was it?" blond Bill made a really shocked face with large eyes.

The doorbell interrupted their little dispute, and Bill thanked whatever deities may be present for their perfect timing.

"I'll get it!" he yelled, running out the kitchen.

"Hey babe! Woah, you got a sunburn?" Ria asked, lifting her sunglasses as she walked into the apartment.

"Uh, hi," Bill mumbled, turning his still blushing face away; "You're just in time for lunch!"

"I hoped so, because I'm starving," she grinned, taking her shoes off before following Bill into the kitchen.

"Hey baby," Tom grinned, kissing her in that same chaste way that Bill had observed the other day. No matter how often he saw Tom with Ria, he still couldn't get used to the fact that his twin had a girlfriend; it was unnatural.

 

After lunch, Ria invited Bill to a photo shooting she had that afternoon. Bill was mostly just going through all their clothes and shoes, barely paying attention to the actual photo shooting: he'd had plenty of his own already, and even though he considered it really fun, it was a lot more boring to watch than to participate, so he decided to rummage through the closet instead.

It was half through the shooting, while Bill was trying on different sunglasses, that he heard Ria came back in to change, accompanied by the photographer whose name Bill had forgotten already. Bill made his way through the many clothes racks, but paused dead in his tracks when he suddenly caught a glimpse of Ria through all the clothes standing around. She was making out with the photographer; Bill's eyeballs nearly fell out of his head at the shocking sight - she was cheating on Tom! With a girl! Which was actually sort of hot, but still so wrong since she was supposed to be with Tom.

Cautiously, Bill ducked behind a full rack, hoping they wouldn't see him, while he tried to make sense of the situation. So Ria was kissing a random girl... everyone knew Tom was really into the whole threesome thing — did he know about this? Was he around? Was Bill about to witness something he really didn't want to see? Were they in an open relationship and Tom didn't care? But Tom had said they were exclusive... But he'd also kissed Bill...

His head was spinning with the sudden overload of twisted information; what was wrong with the future?!

While Ria changed and made out with her... whatever that was, Bill crouched behind clothes racks, hoping they wouldn't see him. He needed to go home and tell Tom about this. Even if Tom was a total player, he deserved to know if his girlfriend was cheating on him.

Once Ria was finally done changing and the two women left the room, Bill sneaked out unnoticed and headed back to their apartment; luckily his older self had given him some money so he could take a cab.

"Tom?" Bill asked as he entered the apartment; he needed to approach this delicately because there was a chance that Tom didn't know about this, and might actually be hurt. Really? Would Tom really be hurt if he found out his girlfriend had a girlfriend...? Part of Bill was quite certain Tom would find this great and arrange a threesome right away, but another part hoped that this Tom would be more mature than that, and would actually resent her for it. Unless of course he already knew, in which case it really didn't matter.

The apartment was quiet, except for the music coming from Tom's bedroom. Perhaps he was lucky and his older self had gone out somewhere so he could talk to Tom in peace.

With a soft knock, he opened the door and nearly passed out at the sight.

In utter shock, Bill stared at the scene before him; it was plain obvious what was happening here. It left no doubt as to what this situation meant; both twins were half naked, passionately kissing on the bed - there was no way that was normal twin behavior.

"Bill!" his older self shrieked, pulling away from Tom and nearly falling off the bed; "What are you doing here?" he asked a bit in panic.

"What the hell are you guys doing?" Bill asked in disbelief; this couldn't be happening.

"It's not what it looks like," his older version assured him immediately.

"Actually, it sort of is," Tom mumbled drily.

"What's going on?" Bill nearly yelled, beginning to get hysterical; "What the hell are you doing? You're twins!"

"Calm down Bill, just let me explain," blond Bill got up from the bed; "I told you that this was going to be sort of hard for you to understand, but-"

"Hard to understand?! It's impossible to understand - you guys are twins! This is your boyfriend?" he gasped in total horror. 

"Bill calm down," his older self grabbed his arms, giving him a soft shake; "I'm sorry that you had to find out this way... Tom and I are... well..." obviously he couldn't really find the right words.

"No! That can't be... you can't... how could you?" Bill felt the last remains of his composure slipping away as he stared up into his older self's eyes; "How can you be with him? Him? Out of all the people in the world, why him?" not wanting to hear the answer, Bill dashed back into his bedroom and slammed the door.

He couldn't accept that this was true. Not Tom.

A second later his older self stormed in; "Just let me explain it!" he pleaded desperately. 

"Explain then!" Bill nearly screamed again; "Explain how you were so pathetic as to end up with him! You know how he is! You know him better than anyone. How can you degrade yourself like that? Were you so desperate that you let him have you?" his voice broke at the end of the sentence.

"What are you talking about? It's not like that," his older self stared in bewilderment, shaking his head; "Bill, it's not like that," he repeated firmly, grabbing Bill's shoulders.

"I am never going to do this! I am never going to be as pathetic as you!" Bill yelled, shoving his arms away and running from the room.

He didn't get very far because he ran into Tom in the hall, nearly knocking them both over; "You!" he accused angrily, shoving Tom away from him; "How could you use me like that? Isn't Ria enough for you?" he felt tears stinging his eyes at the awful thought of being one of Tom's fuckbuddies; how could his life have come to this?

"It's not like that Bill," Tom also insisted, holding his arms to keep him from running away. 

"Get off me!" Bill snarled furiously, trying to free himself, but his older self joined forces with Tom, ruining any chance of escape. 

"Will you just please calm down and let us explain?" future Bill asked urgently.

"I don't need your stupid explanation. I know what's going on - you're both totally sick. "You-" he glared angrily at his older self; "Are completely pathetic and lack any sort of self-respect. While you-" he snapped at Tom; "Are totally sick for abusing the fact that I can't find anyone better in my life!"

"That's not true," his older self denied vehemently, trying to keep Bill from struggling away; "We love each other, Bill," he tried desperately but Bill just shook his head.

"That is never going to happen! I am never going to be as pitiful as you. I am never going to let Tom do this to me," he stated angrily, trying to fight down the tears.

"You're not going to ruin my life," his older self glared angrily, shoving him against the wall.

"Bill," Tom tried to persuade his twin, but obviously he wasn't listening.

"This is what I want - Tom is what I want. Tom is what you want," future Bill snarled angrily, digging his nails into Bill's arms. 

"No he isn't!" Bill yelled, unsuccessfully trying to push his older self off of him.

"Yes he is and you will be together with him, no matter what I have to do to achieve it," he sneered dangerously, momentarily scaring Bill; he had never seen himself so angry before.

"I don't want to," Bill objected, still trying to squirm out of his death grip.

"You will," his older self growled quietly, pushing him against the wall again; "I'm not going to let you separate us. You will love Tom, whether you want to or not!" he glared at Bill angrily, causing a cold shiver to run up his spine; this was a part of himself he had never known before.

"Let go of me, you're hurting me!" Bill was still trying to wrestle himself free, but his older self appeared to have a whole lot more strength, and refused to loosen his grip even an inch.

"You're not going to take this away from me," older Bill threatened; "I've been through too much for you to destroy it all because you're too stupid to see that this is what you want. I don't care if I have to force you to understand."

"No! Get off me!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh noes, poor baby bill.... O.O


	7. Chapter 7

"Stop it Bill, you're scaring him," Tom interrupted softly, placing his hand on Bill's shoulder.

"I don't care. No one is ever going to separate us. He will understand and if it's the last thing he'll ever do," blond Bill snarled angrily.

"No!" Bill yelled more in fear than anything else; "I don't want to be with a whore like him! I don't want someone to play with me until they get bored and trade me for a new toy... I don't want someone to hurt me like that..." Bill finally finished with a choked sob, trying to keep himself from breaking down completely; how could he have gotten himself into this mess? How could he grow up to be so stupid?

"It's not like that," his older self said softly, anger completely gone; "Bill... Tom would never do that. He loves me... he loves you," he whispered quietly, pulling him into a tight hug.

"No he doesn't," Bill sobbed softly, shaking his head into his older self's shoulder; "He's going to cheat on you and he's going to leave me," he mumbled miserably; "How can you be so stupid?" Bill began getting angry again; "How could you let this happen?!" he shoved him away, freeing himself.

"Bill," his future self tried to reason with him, but Bill didn't want to hear it.

"You're both totally sick... and I'm not going to let this happen. When I go back home, I'm going to make sure that this will never ever be," he said harshly; "I'm the one who controls the future - and you two are never going to be together," he snapped coldly, going back into his bedroom and locking the door.

"Bill, open the door!" his older self knocked, trying to get in, but Bill ignored him, searching for his clothes.

Once he was fully dressed he grabbed his older self's wallet and unlocked the door; "I'm leaving," he stated firmly, pushing past his twins.

"The hell you are!" his older self snapped angrily, pulling his arm; "You're not just going to walk around alone, you'll get yourself killed."

"It's better than being here with you two freaks!" Bill snapped back, twisting his arm out of his future self's grasp.

"Stop being so stupid," blond Bill glared angrily, trying to keep him from walking out the front door.

Without a second thought, Bill punched his older version in the jaw, causing him to stumble back.

"Bill!" Tom yelled horrified, running over to his twin.

Bill took the opportunity to slip out of the door and run down the hallway to the staircase, ignoring his brothers calling his name.

Of course Bill had no idea where to go, but he just couldn't stay there with his brothers anymore. He couldn't believe he would become like this in a few years... no, not in a few years - in just a few weeks, supposedly. According to what Bill had told him, he was supposed to get together with... Tom right after he awoke from the coma. Of course that would never happen; Bill wouldn't make the same mistake that his older version had made - he wouldn't throw himself away like that. He wanted someone better than Tom - someone who felt the same way he did. Someone who could love the way he could - not some guy whose idea of love was a meaningless night of drunken sex.

Bill nearly broke down crying at the thought of himself with someone as careless as Tom; of course he loved Tom more than anyone, but as a brother, not a lover. Tom was a great brother, but the worst partner anyone could ever have, and Bill was determined never to let things get to that.

 

It was already dawning by the time Bill finally found a hotel where he checked in with his older self's credit card, and finally managed to get some much needed rest.

Of course falling asleep turned out to be harder than expected, no matter how tired he was. He couldn't shake the awful images of himself and his twin in bed; what was wrong with them? They needed therapy. How had it come to that? Why had Bill suddenly lowered himself to such a level as to have sex with a person like that? Completely putting aside the fact that they were twins of course. He wasn't even sure what was worse, the fact that they were twins, or the fact that it was Tom. Oddly enough the twin thing didn't seem to bother him as much as he had initially thought, but the fact that it was Tom that was just... wrong. Tom - the worst player he had ever known. The guy who had slept with practically every girl he met since he was thirteen. What had compelled him to get together with someone like that?

Eventually, however, Bill drifted off into sleep, forgetting his twisted future for a few blissful hours.

But just a few because soon he was woken up by someone knocking on his door. With a groan he crawled up from the bed, holding his throbbing head.

"What?" he growled darkly, opening the door. It was Tom.

"Good morning. Or evening, more like it," he smiled softly, pushing past Bill into the room.

"What do you want?" Bill snapped irritated, slamming the door.

"I want to talk," he said patiently, sitting down at the small table while gesturing for Bill to join him.

"Fine, talk," Bill grumbled tiredly, knowing he couldn't kick him out anyway.

"I'm sorry that you got so freaked out by this. We tried to keep you sheltered from it but... well... yeah," he shrugged with a small smile.

Bill didn't say anything; he didn't know what to say.

"I know what you think of me," he continued quietly, his eyes set on the room service menu on the table, avoiding Bill's gaze; "But I'm not like that. I'm not the way you always believed me to be."

Bill rolled his eyes; "Right. You suddenly changed so much. You're a different person. Give me a break, people don't change like that..." he snapped, even though he knew that Tom had changed.

"You're right - I didn't change. I was always like this, I just didn't want you to know," he sighed, giving him a sad smile.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Bill asked slowly, not sure if he believed him. Would Tom really lie to him like this? Sure Tom was a total whore, but he generally played with open cards; he never made people believe that he loved them - they always knew it was just for fun.

"I've been in love with you since we were ten," he replied slowly, nearly causing Bill to have a seizure; "But of course I knew I could never be with you, so instead I just slept around with everyone else because I was frustrated and trying to take my mind off things. I know that probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but... well... you know me, I'm dumb like that," he said with a small chuckle.

Bill's head was spinning; was Tom really telling the truth? No, that couldn't be - Tom was a natural born tramp. It couldn't be that all of that had just been because...

"I couldn't be with you, so I compensated it by being with everyone else instead," he continued slowly, his eyes still reflecting that unusual deep sadness that Bill had never seen in his younger version before. "I didn't think that being with you was ever an option, so I never cared what I did or with whom... if I had, even for just a moment, believed that being with you was possible, I would have never wanted to be with anyone else in my entire life."

These were words, or similar words, to the ones Bill had wanted to hear his entire life, even if they came from the last person he had ever expected to hear them from.

"I know that there's a part of you that wants to believe me... I know there's a part of you that wants to feel the same, but you can't allow yourself to know it because of how much you hate what I stand for," he said softly; "I know how much you've always hated it, even though you've never said it, but it's not true Bill," his voice had the same urgent tone that Bill had heard in his future self's back in their apartment, making it blatantly obvious that this was what they both truly wanted. But why?

"Why?" Bill asked in confusion; "You-we're twins... how did this happen? I thought you were with Ria?"

"Ria is just a friend who knows of our relationship and covers for us. By letting the world know that I'm in a relationship with her, it gives me an excuse not to sleep around anymore," he smiled fondly; "She's the only person other than Georg and Gustav who know about us."

"What?!" Bill shrieked horrified; "They know?!"

"Yes, of course. They help us keep it secret on tour and all that... we couldn't really do it without them," he chuckled slightly. "To go back to your earlier question of how that happened... I don't really know. When you woke up from that coma you suddenly knew. Maybe because you heard me talking to you all the time," he laughed sheepishly before continuing in a more serious tone; "I thought you would die and... sort of confessed all my feelings to you, believing you couldn't hear me anyway... but apparently you somehow did, even if you couldn't remember it in detail."

"I don't understand... I mean I..." suddenly he felt bad for the things he had said; at the time he had ignored the hurt look in Tom's eyes at the words he had said, but now he remembered them clearly. Was Tom really telling the truth? Did he really love him so unconditionally? "I don't get why I would do that... I don't want to be with you," he whispered, not being able to look at him. No matter how different Tom might be now, the Tom that was waiting for him in the past was a whole other story.

Tom was silent, so Bill carefully looked at him; he was staring at the menu again, just nodding slowly.

"You don't have to be," he finally said, lifting his head a little to give him a sad smile; "I understand."

"You do?" he mumbled warily; his older self hadn't been very understanding of this at all.

Tom sighed with a nod; "Yeah. We're twins after all and, like you said, I'm a total whore, so why would you ever want to be with me when you deserve someone so much better," he finished with a smile and got up; "Come on, let's go home. I promise Bill calmed down already," he added with a soft chuckle.

Reluctantly Bill went home with his twin, hoping he'd been right about his older self being calmer.

"Bill! Thank god you're alright," blond Bill hugged him tightly, kissing the top of his head.

Bill just sighed and nodded, still a bit scared of himself.

"Is everything ok?" his future self asked softly, looking back and forth between him and Tom.

"Yeah," Tom nodded; "I'm starving, can we have some dinner?"

Older Bill frowned slightly; "Wait. What does that mean?"

"Let it go Bill," Tom sighed, opening the fridge.

"The hell is that supposed to mean? Bill?" his older self gave him a sharp look; "You understand this now, right? Tom explained it to you, right?" he demanded, glaring at Tom.

"Bill, let it go," Tom said a bit more sternly; "It's Bill's decision."

"What?!" blond Bill raised his voice again, glaring at Bill.

"Bill," Tom said softly, coming up behind him and wrapping his arms around him; Bill began feeling really awkward and took a step back; "Please just let it go," he whispered softly, nuzzling into his twin's neck.

Bill took another step back, backing into the kitchen door; the sight was more than disturbing, especially because his older self looked completely devastated.

"But Tom-" older Bill started urgently.

"It's alright," Tom cut him off, pulling him around; "Bill why don't you go to your room? I'll bring you some dinner in a minute, ok?" he smiled, hugging Bill's older self.

Bill nodded, backing out into the hall through the swinging kitchen door.

"Why didn't you tell him?!" future Bill nearly yelled as soon as Bill had left the kitchen.

"I did, but he chose a different path than the one you took," Tom sighed quietly.

Bill crept back closer to the door to listen to their conversation about him; he wasn't sure he wanted to hear any of this, but his sneaky nature didn't leave him much choice.

"That's not possible... he's me, he has to make the same decisions I made," Bill insisted firmly.

"Maybe not. Maybe by coming here something in you changed... something that makes you not want to be with me in the future," Tom mused.

"No!" Bill's voice broke in his urged plea, causing Bill to nearly break down himself; "That can't be happening... we can't just let him go back to the past and ruin our future." Bill could hear his own strained voice that was close to tears; why did he want this so much? Why Tom?

"We can't let him separate us," Bill nearly sobbed in the kitchen.

"We can't force him to love me, Bill, things don't work that way," Tom sighed sadly; "If he doesn't want to be with me, there's nothing we can do about it."

"But he does want to be with you. I know he does... he just doesn't know it yet," Bill ranted in frustration; "If a person doesn't know that they want something, they still want it though, right?

"I don't know... but you certainly can't expect them to react the same way as if they would know that they wanted it. Just because someone may want something very deep down, doesn't mean they are willing to accept that they want it, least of all act on that desire," Tom said from deeper into the kitchen while he began cooking, judging by the background sound.

"But I know myself. I know what I wanted back then... I wanted exactly what you are... I just didn't know that that's who you were. I needed proof of what I mean to you... and I'm going to show myself that... I'm going to show myself what we have," Bill said firmly.

"Just don't force it. You're freaked out enough as it is, don't make it worse than you did yesterday," Tom said drily.

"I apologized for that," Bill mumbled.

"Yeah, to the wrong person though," Tom chuckled; "Why don't you bring this to yourself and you guys talk about it? I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Fine," Bill sighed, and it was silent for a while, making Bill wonder if they were kissing again. Some strange part of him wanted to peek through the door, but he didn't dare. Instead, he silently retreated into his room and sat on the bed, waiting for his older self who arrived a minute later with dinner.

"Hey," his older self smiled faintly, sitting down next to him; "We didn't really feel like cooking, so it's just scrambled eggs for dinner tonight," he shrugged apologetically.

"Thanks," Bill smiled awkwardly, taking the plate; he was actually starving and didn't really care what food he got.

They ate in silence for a bit before older Bill spoke again; "I'm sorry about yesterday... are you ok?" he asked softly, giving him a careful glance.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it," he smiled reassuringly; he was also really sorry about saying that he would make sure they never ended up together - that had been rather uncalled for, but he didn't want to apologize, fearing it might make him think that he had changed his mind about it.

His future self sighed, eating the last remains of his dinner before setting the plate on the desk together with Bill's.

"Why don't you believe Tom? Why don't you believe me?" he asked miserably, lying down on the bed.

"I do... it's just not what I want," Bill shook his head, heading to the bathroom; he didn't want to lie down next to himself so he decided to go brush his teeth instead.

"Yes it is Bill," his older self insisted, following him into the bathroom; "It's exactly what you want. I know what you want, and this is it."

"No it's not. Maybe it was what you wanted, but it's not what I-"

"Bill, I was you!" his future self groaned in exasperation; "I know everything about you because you and I are the same person. I know what you fantasize about... I know your deepest secrets and desires. I know that you want someone to love you exactly the way Tom does - for some weird reason you're just incapable of accepting that the love you want comes from him. Why?" he asked while Bill had begun brushing his teeth.

In order to talk semi-decently, he had to remove the toothbrush from his mouth; "I don't know. It's just not what I want, and I really don't understand why it is what you want. Why do you trust someone like him?"

"Someone like him?! Bill! You're talking about Tom! He's our twin. He cares more about us than any other person in the whole world... do you honestly think that he would ever break our heart?" he asked slightly outraged.

"Maybe not intentionally, but like you just said... we're talking about Tom," Bill said after removing the toothbrush again; this teeth brushing event wasn't very successful - maybe he should just stop for today.

"Not the Tom that you know... the Tom that he never wanted you to know. The one that's here... don't tell me you didn't notice how different he is," blond Bill demanded.

"Well maybe but still," Bill shook his head, spitting out and rinsing his mouth.

"But still what? Bill... we're talking about the rest of your life here... don't mess this up for us," he said urgently.

Bill sighed, stalking back into the room; "You're asking too much of me. I don't know how you dealt with this, but this is too much for me."

"I'm asking you to give him a chance to be everything that you've ever wanted. That's hardly a lot," older Bill huffed, crawling into bed next to him after switching off the light.

Running his hands over his face Bill sighed again, louder and more exasperated this time; "You don't know what I want Bill. Maybe when I first got here you and I were the same, but now... now I'm different than you were. I've lived through things that you haven't, and they obviously made me different than what you were back then," he tried to reason with himself.

"Really?" his older self whispered into the darkness of their bedroom; "So you don't want someone to love you the way that you love them? Someone who will be as passionate about love and life as you are? Someone to whom you will mean more than anything else in the world? Someone who would kill for you?" he demanded huskily, whispering into Bill's ear; "You don't want a twisted, unconditional love that no one else in the world can understand but you and that one person? Do you not want someone to love you for everything that you are, including all those dark, dirty secrets you have? You don't want someone to know you in and out, and still love you beyond reason?"

Bill swallowed drily; did his future version believe that Tom was all of those things?

Soft fingers brushed against his neck and chin, turning his head towards the origin of his future voice.

"Do you not want that anymore? Do you not want the same as me anymore?" the words were whispered so close that he could feel his hot breath against his lips; "Do you not?" he demanded fiercely.

"I-I do," Bill muttered, trying to inch back from the close proximity.

"Then why don't you believe me that I know what you want?" his future self whispered.

Bill opened his mouth to reply, but the words got stuck in his throat when something soft and moist brushed against his lips. Was that...?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg, dun dun duuuunnnnnnnnn xDDDDDDDDD oh by the way, if you feel like commenting or something, I'm always happy to read it :3 dont be shy


	8. Chapter 8

Bill blinked in confusion, trying to understand what was happening. Was he being kissed... by himself? 

It was by far the most unusual situation he had ever been in, obviously. For a short moment he considered freaking out, but the soft lips upon his own were tempting him to return the affection. The last time he had kissed someone had been a few years ago, and it had been one of those grandmother kisses - no tongue, just awkward lip touching; apparently he had learned a lot in the past ten years.

Older Bill propped himself up on his arm, leaning over him as he slowly deepened the kiss, pushing his tongue past Bill's hesitant lips. Though he was somewhat freaked out, this was a lot less awkward than he would have expected, and soon enough found himself returning the gentle kiss; actually this was great, he decided after a few more moments.   
Enthusiastically he pushed his older tongue back into its owner's mouth, immediately following it with his own to explore that familiar territory that felt so alien; even though it was his own mouth in ten years, it felt completely different as he ran his tongue across his older self's teeth, tongue and every other part he could reach. As the kiss deepened, he wrapped his arms around blond Bill's neck, drawing him even closer, not being able to get enough of the amazing sensation that was kissing; this was definitely better than he had thought it would be.

Slowly his older version pulled back, leaving him deprived of that warm mouth of his; "When did you begin doubting yourself? Why don't you trust me?" he whispered against his wet lips.

"I do," Bill mumbled, slightly dazed from the unexpected situation.

"And I trust Tom, so you should trust him as well," future Bill spoke against his lips before softly brushing against them with his own again.

Bill didn't know what to say, and didn't really feel like speaking right now; how had he lived 16 years without this? This was completely addicting.

Hungrily he drew his older self closer, deepening the kiss; some small part of his mind was screaming that there was something seriously wrong with this situation, but all other parts of him ignored it - ever since he had gotten here everything had been seriously weird, confusing, and all sorts of wrong anyway, so what did it really matter anymore.

Again his future version pulled away all too soon, nearly causing Bill to groan in frustration; why couldn't they just keep kissing?

"Bill," his older voice spoke softly into the darkness; "Why can't you love Tom as much as you love me? And as much as I love him..."

Bill took a deep breath, leaning back down into the pillows; "Because I know you... you're me and I trust you, but Tom is... not like me - not like us. He would never understand me, he never has," he insisted bitterly.

"That's not true," his older self murmured softly against his ear; "Tom knows and understands you better than anyone else in the world."

"Except for you," Bill pointed out; what did that mean...? Was he in the process of falling for himself...? No way. Was that even possible...? Well, given the circumstances...

"Of course me, but you will never find someone who understands you the way that you do - that's impossible," blond Bill chuckled quietly, placing soft kisses along his jawline.

Bill sighed heavily; "Yeah I know..."

"Goodnight Bill," his future self whispered, giving him one more, soft kiss.

"Goodnight Bill," he murmured back, trying to comprehend what he was feeling; what was happening to him? Part of him wanted to talk to himself about this, and the other just wanted to... think about it by himself, without his older self being involved.

Of course he hardly got any sleep at all, unlike his future version who snoozed peacefully next to him, oblivious to the giant dilemma dancing around in his head; why was his older self so comfortable with this?! Ten years in the future he would be seriously weird, he concluded tiredly.

 

"Morning," he greeted Tom and future Bill the next morning; well this was awkward.

"Hey," Tom smiled casually; did he know what had happened between them last night...? Had older Bill told him that he had... made out with himself last night? Was that considered cheating? Technically seen he was kissing himself, so did that even count? It had to since Bill and Bill were two different people, right?

"Want some toast?" his older self offered with a bright smile, holding up a freshly toasted slice.

Bill just nodded awkwardly, trying to determine whether he had cheated on Tom in ten years or not. But he would never cheat on anyone; cheating was the worst anyone could ever do... yet he had made out with himself. Seriously wtf...

Had he really caused himself to cheat on Tom? That was terrible; Tom was supposed to be the cheater, not him. The future was so wrong in so many different ways, it was hard to keep track.

"So what are we doing today?" his future self chirped happily, looking back and forth between Bill and Tom.

"I think we should stay here," Tom answered, munching on his granola.

"But I want to go somewhere," Bill protested immediately; he didn't want to stay locked in here with himself and his twin - that was bound to get ugly.

"You went out enough yesterday," blond Bill pointed out, obviously still not very happy about yesterday's events; Bill glared at himself - so much for being over it.

"We could chill out a bit. Watch some movies, play some video games, order lots of fast food," Tom smiled encouragingly; damn Tom, he knew how much Bill loved American fast food; "We bought you tropical Skittles," he added with a seductive grin.

Bill groaned in resignation; "Fiiine, let's stay in. But I'm picking the movies!" he announced with determination.

"I want to watch Twilight though," his older self pouted.

"But I saw that a few days ago," Bill whined.

"But you said we could watch it again," blond Bill protested immediately.

"Enough! We're not watching Twilight!" Tom finalized sternly, glaring at both of them; "We're watching Die Hard."

"Yeah right, keep dreaming," older Bill replied immediately while younger Bill rolled his eyes in agreement; "Yeah Tom, so not happening."

It took them nearly another hour before they finally settled on Avatar, because apparently it was the best movie of the century; both his twins agreed it was an absolute must-see.

"And it has like, the best special effects ever!" his older self whispered through mouth's full of popcorn; "About 60% of the movie is CGI. You should have seen it in the movies with us! The 3D was amazing."

Bill thought the movie was great, but definitely not the best movie ever; "You guys are so overrating this movie... it's not that good," he shrugged.

"I'm going to pretend I did not just hear that," Tom said passively.

"Are they having alien sex?" Bill asked in disbelief while he stared wide eyed at the screen; "That is so many kinds of wrong - isn't that guy actually a human or something?"

"Shush. That is the hottest movie sex scene ever," his older self sniggered raunchily.

Bill quietly observed his twins while they watched the love scene on the exotic alien planet; for him the love between them was far more alien than the one on the screen. For the millionth time today he had to think back to the kiss of last night; it had also been out of this world, and yet so right - is that what their love was like? So wrong and yet so right? Again he tried to make sense of how they might feel and of how he himself felt, because ever since last night he had trouble disagreeing with the current situation. Even though his logical, ethical, moral, etc. mind told him that it was totally wrong, he found it harder and harder to agree with it; maybe it wasn't as wrong as he had thought it was? Maybe Tom wasn't that bad; maybe he was as reliable and trustworthy a lover as Bill knew he was a brother.

"Earth to Bill! Are you still with us?" blond Bill poked him.

"Ah, what?" Bill jumped at the poke, slapping his older hand away.

"I asked if you wanted some more popcorn? I thought I'd make a little more since we're all out," Tom shook the empty microwave popcorn bag to indicate what he was talking about.

"Oh yeah, absolutely. Popcorn!" Bill nodded enthusiastically while Tom got up to make more snacks for them.

"Are you alright?" his older version asked once Tom had disappeared into the kitchen; "You seem a bit off."

"You would be too if you were in my place," Bill grumbled at himself.

"What is that supposed to mean?" his future self asked defensively.

"You know what that's supposed to mean!" he whispered back, not wanting Tom to hear them.

"Oh stop being so dramatic. I wasn't that uptight when I was your age," older Bill rolled his eyes.

"Yes you were!" Bill shot back quietly, slapping his older self's shoulder; "You were exactly like me when you were my age!"

"Last night you said I wasn't," he pointed out softly, raising an eyebrow.

"You know what I mean," Bill grumbled, feeling his cheeks heating a little at the mention of last night.

"Actually I don't think I do. You always twist things around in a way to benefit you," his older version crossed his arms, giving him a pointed look.

"Yeah? Well... so do you," Bill rolled his eyes, sniffing indignantly.

"I do not," he defended immediately.

"Do too!" Bill threw his hands up in exasperation; arguing with himself was so stupid.

"Do not!" blond Bill shot back; "Ok, ok, seriously, this is not productive. Let's just talk about it," he cut Bill off who was about to argue.

"Ugh. Why do you always want to talk about things?" he grumbled moodily.

"Don't give me that. I know that you also want to talk about it, and you're just too chicken to say so," blond Bill smiled sweetly while Bill rolled his eyes; damn himself for knowing himself so well.

"I don't have anything to say. This whole thing is just weird," he finally sighed, shaking his head.

"Why?" his older self asked quietly, edging a little closer to him.

Bill swallowed nervously; what was he doing...? Why was he so close again? And why was he uncomfortable being so close to himself? Oh right, because last night that had ended in a kiss...

"I just don't understand why you would want to be with Tom," he said even though it was only half true; by now he could actually understand it quite well, he was just unwilling to accept that he could understand it.

"Bill, don't do this again," future Bill whispered while wrapping his arms around him from the side, snuggling into his hair; older Bill was so clingy. Almost as clingy as Bill.

"I don't want to be with him..." he mumbled silently, unsure whether he was trying to convince himself in the future or the past.

"You will," his future self whispered into his ear, right before he nibbled on it.

"AH! Bill!" Bill squeaked, pulling his head away from the sensation that caused his entire skin to erupt into goose-bumps.

Future Bill laughed quietly and pulled him closer again, turning his head so they were now face to face; "I promise you will," he whispered with a smile before bringing their lips together; this time Bill didn't even try to pull away even though he had enough time during which he knew his older self's intention. His future Bill's tongue danced over his lips, causing that crazy, tickling feeling that immediately made him open his mouth to grant him entrance.   
His older self's tongue piercing clicked softly as it brushed past his teeth, and his tongue involuntarily set out to greet its future version, letting the beads from their piercings collide into each other while his tongue brushed against the soft, slippery surface of his future mouth that he still wasn't at all used to. God, this kissing thing was so awesome he completely forgot that there was a really good reason why they shouldn't be doing this right now... what reason was that again?

"Um..." Oh yeah, it was Tom; "Bills?"


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone ^^ I wont be posting over the weekend because I'm not here... a friends getting married o.o but I'll post as soon as I'm back ^^ probably monday or tuesday.  
> Enjoy!

Bill fell off the couch while trying to jump away from his older self in horror, staring in panic at Tom who was still standing in the doorway with a very surprised expression.

"What are you doing?" he asked, looking back and forth between both Bills; he didn't look angry, just a bit surprised and... amused?!

"Changing my mind," blond Bill replied softly, giving his twin an expectant smile.

"How's that going?" he smiled at Bill who was still sitting on the floor, blushing deeply; had Tom seriously just caught him making out with himself? Oh god, this whole thing was so messed up, why was no one freaking out about this?!

"I dont know. How is it going, Bill?" his older version asked, reaching him a hand to help him back onto the couch.

"Uh..." Bill mumbled awkwardly, crawling back on the couch where they were soon joined by Tom who casually dropped down next to the future Bill, apparently not upset that his lover had just made out with himself.

Older Bill sighed, reaching for the bag of popcorn that Tom was still holding; "You want some?" he offered, holding the bag out to Bill.

"No, I don't!" Bill exclaimed outraged; how could his older self be thinking of popcorn in a critical moment like this?! What was wrong with these people?

"Ok, ok," the blond threw the bag on the table with a soft chuckle; "Don't be upset," he smiled at Bill, creeping a little closer. What the heck?! Did he seriously plan on-? His older version pulled him back into another kiss - apparently he did plan on kissing again, yes.

Bill squawked in outrage, pushing his older self away while Tom just sat in silence, watching the scene unfold.

"Bill!" Bill said horrified.

"What?" he asked innocently, leaning in the other direction to rest his back against Tom's shoulder; for some weird reason Tom didn't seem upset about this at all - what the hell was wrong with these two?!

"You're not pissed at us, right?" future Bill looked over his shoulder to glance at his twin.

"Why would I be — it's you after all," Tom replied with a small smile; "Maybe you guys need some privacy," he smiled softly, getting up.

"No, wait," blond Bill pulled him back down on the couch and into a heated kiss; Tom's eyebrows rose in surprise, but he didn't object. Bill looked away awkwardly, feeling himself blush at his future actions; good gracious, had he always been this bold? Probably...

Before Bill could think much more of it, his older self was done kissing Tom and turned to him again, smiling slyly. Bill swallowed nervously as his older self approached him again, and gave Tom a paranoid glance but his older twin was just watching intently with no intention to stop his twin who had very clear intentions. Though Bill had half a mind of running away, the other half remained passive and watched as his future self slowly drew closer until their lips touched again and he lost the little resistance he had had for this bizarre situation. If Tom was alright with this then it didn't really matter, right? Sure it was a bit weird that his twin was watching, but then again... he was kissing himself, so weird didn't even begin to describe it.

Future Bill pushed his dominant tongue into his mouth again, making him sigh softly before he clumsily returned the kiss. He was beginning to get a bit more practice now that he'd already kissed himself a few times, but was still far from confident about this issue.

Absently he noticed that his future mouth suddenly tasted like orange juice - when did Bill have orange juice? Or was it Tom who had had orange juice in the kitchen earlier? Bill was reminded that the mouth he was kissing had been kissing his twin a second ago... that was so wrong.

However a second later he regretted thinking those words because his future self pulled away again and turned back to Tom in order to kiss him instead, though one of his hands remained around Bill's neck, still stroking him softly while kissing his twin.

In total fascination, Bill watched his future self passionately kissing their twin who had one arm wrapped around the blonde's shoulder while his other caressed his cheek.

Slowly Tom opened his eyes, looking directly at Bill who didn't manage to look away, entranced by the intent gaze that he had never seen in his twin before. Screw time travel - there was nothing more bizarre than looking his twin in the eye while he was kissing his future version in 10 years; this was by far the weirdest thing that had ever happened to him. And somehow it was more fascinating and captivating than anything he'd ever experienced before.

Very soon, blond Bill was done with Tom and turned back to Bill, licking his lips tentatively before bringing them back to Bill's, whose head was spinning from all the confusing thoughts and emotions coursings through him. This time future Bill kept one hand on Tom while they kissed, slowly pulling him closer to them before breaking the kiss with Bill after only a few brief moments, leaving Bill staring directly at Tom. Gently, his future self pulled him a little closer to Tom until they were only a few inches apart, and older Bill kissed him briefly again before pushing Tom towards him.

Though he knew what was about to happen, he didn't have the will to pull away from his twin who was about to kiss him. Every alarm in his head was ringing to remind him that this was Tom: worst whore he had ever met and breaker of all hearts, but somehow he just didn't care right now. He was about to make the same mistake every other person had made when they fell for his brother - he was about to become one of those people he had always considered to be so pathetic because they fell for his brother's charms. He knew that he would never view this as lightly as his brother, and would probably end up with a broken heart, but right now he just didn't care.

Tom's hand found its place on his cheek, replacing older Bill's earlier hand, gently stroking him and running his fingers through his hair while his eyes asked a question that Bill had no answer to - he just remained unmoving, paralyzed by paranoia.

His future version gently brought his and Tom's faces closer together, guiding them with a hand at the nape of their necks until their lips brushed against each other. Bill's heart was racing and he closed his eyes against the soft feeling of Tom's lips that were still wet from the earlier kiss with the 26 year old Bill.

The first difference he noticed immediately was the lack of one lip ring; Bill had had two, while Tom only had one — it was fascinating and Bill brushed his lips against the smooth metal, wanting to lick it but not daring to.

Tom was far less aggressive than Bill's older version had been, and he kept the kiss superficial and light, only letting their lips caress each other; was he waiting for Bill to decide how intimate things were about to get? Of course Bill was completely overwhelmed by that choice and had no idea what to do.

However very soon the soft nibbling and sucking let him forget his anxiety, and he involuntarily parted his lips, pressing them closer to Tom. Of course the fact that his older version kept encouraging their actions by pushing them closer together was also helping his wrecked state of mind; there was nothing more reassuring than having your older self motivating you.

Tentatively he pushed into Tom's mouth where his older twin's tongue greeted him; yeah... the orange juice was definitely from Tom. He tasted like orange juice and popcorn, and even though it was a weird mixture, Bill found that he liked it a lot - whether that was because it actually tasted good or because it was Tom, was unclear at that moment.

Kissing Tom was completely different than kissing himself had been; it was slow and gentle, while older Bill had been assertive and rough. Bill couldn't decide which one he liked better but since Tom was so tender, he decided to take on the dominant part and began to deepen the kiss, nibbling and tugging around on Tom's tongue and lips, just the way future Bill had done with him earlier.

Apparently Tom was alright with this because he pulled him closer, dragging him across his older self where Bill settled comfortably on future Bill's lap. Somewhere in the back of his mind he was finding this situation seriously weird, but the little moral he had left was buried somewhere deep beneath his twin's lips. Tom's tenderness and future Bill's encouraging were doing wonders to his awkwardness and he slowly began exploring the situation with his hands, letting one of them run up his future self's chest while the other wrapped around Tom's neck to hold him close.

The heated kissing carried on for a few more seconds during which the blond Bill snaked his arm around Bill's waist, pulling against his chest. Bill was now tightly trapped between his twins and running out of oxygen because the little bit of air he managed to get was not enough to satisfy his frantic body any longer.

With a soft gasp he broke away from Tom's lips, still not fully comprehending the crazy situation he suddenly found himself in; how in god's name had it come to this?!

While Bill was catching his breath and trying to calm his raging heart, his future version assaulted the lips that Bill had just left, claiming Tom for himself again. The three of them were so close together that he could feel their warm breath across his skin while they kissed, and even though he knew he should be freaking out and running away, he actually felt perfectly comfortable; he knew these two better than anyone else in the world and for some unknown reason this seemed completely natural. He knew what they wanted - what they felt and thought; they were everything he was and everything he wanted to be.

As soon as his twins broke their kiss, his future version turned to him, obviously not having kissed enough; Bill didn't hesitate this time and closed the small distance between them, allowing his older self to kiss him again.

Both his twins kissed so differently, but Bill found himself adjusting rather quickly, and let his older version dominate the situation again. With Tom it had been the other way around; apparently when it came to kissing he was the more aggressive one; he liked it. He had kissed very little so far, but found that he really liked dominating the kiss - except with himself because his older version was obviously not backing down from his position and kissed his tongue into submission.

Not long into the kiss he was startled by an unbelievable feeling that made him whimper and let goose bumps crawl all over his skin; it was Tom's tongue that began lapping at his neck. Bill moaned softly, unable to concentrate on the kiss with himself. Unwilling to break the kiss but wanting to feel more of the amazing, crazy thing Tom was doing, he tilted his head a bit more and wrapped his arms around his future neck to keep himself from sliding to the floor in an undefined puddle of goo.

Somewhere in the very far distance he heard his future self chuckling and felt his smile against his lips. Dizzily he pulled away to stare at himself with large, unfocused eyes, but before he could ask what was so funny, Tom turned him towards him and silenced him again. Bill was completely hazy from all the weird kissing and immediately forgot why he had even stopped kissing himself in the first place; this kissing thing was so amazing he should do it for the rest of eternity. Who cared about food and sleep and all that unnecessary stuff — that was a total waste of time anyway.

As it turned out, in ten years he would be as good as Tom was with that whole neck-licking thing, and soon enough Bill was moaning involuntarily from the insane things his body was suddenly making him feel. How had he gone 16 years without this stuff?

He couldn't wait to be 26.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello dear readers :3 Thanks for being patient over the weekend ^^ heres the new chapter. Enjoy!

"Alright, stop," Bill mumbled dizzily, pulling away from Tom's inviting mouth and detaching his neck from the blonde's lips.

"What?" asked his future self with an innocent smile that didn't fool Bill at all; that was his innocent smile, and he knew it had nothing to do with innocence.

"This... I... No. Seriously," Bill shook his head, crawling a little farther away from his twins; "This is moving way too fast and don't you dare think that I agree with all this just because of all this crazy kissing thing," he mumbled stupidly, feeling himself blush again.

"Oh come on," his future self laughed softly, giving him a tentative smile.

"No, no, no," Bill shook his head; "Don't think that I suddenly agree with this just cuz Tom is a good kisser," he sniffed, avoiding Tom's eyes. "We should continue watching the movie," he said quickly, before either of the twins could say something about it; he didn't want to talk about this right now — he wanted to think. He needed to think. This whole thing was a total mess and he was dead scared of making the worst mistake of his life.

But what would be that mistake? Falling in love with Tom, or turning him down...?

So they carried on watching the movie that Bill was paying zero attention to, which was a real shame because it was actually a really cool movie. Well whatever, he would be able to watch it in a few years when it came out in the movies anyway.

"What are we going to do now that you guys have some time off?" Bill questioned once the movie was over and he was helping his twins pick up all the popcorn that they had dropped in the past few hours. It was great that they had some time to spend together, but what were they going to be doing? What did people do when they had a lot of time?

'We could make out... No! Bad Bill! Stop thinking crap like that!'

"I was thinking we should get you better acquainted with our music. And we should hang out with Ria — she knows some awesome places around L.A. that we could visit," future Bill said enthusiastically.

"Yeah about Ria... what's up with that? I saw her making out with some chick..." Bill remembered.

"Yeah, that's Maggie — a photographer. They often 'work together'," Tom chuckled; "Maggie is rather unhappily married, but doesn't want to get divorced, so of course they keep it a secret and for them it's the perfect cover, just like for us," he explained.

"Oh...wow... that's twisted," Bill nodded slowly.

"Yeah... very practical though," his future version sniggered.

"What happens if Maggie does divorce her husband and then she and Ria officially hook up...?" Bill asked.

"Then I guess I shall be so heartbroken over it that I won't be able to find love for a really long time... until I find another pretend girlfriend," Tom grinned.

Bill shook his head with a small smile.

"Anyway..." older Bill said slowly as they began heading towards their bedrooms at nearly midnight; "Since you already know about us and totally interrupted the awesome sex we were about to have the other day — I'm sleeping in Tom's room tonight," he finished with a wicked grin directed at Bill's horrified face.

"Uh....ok..." Bill mumbled while his future self dragged Tom away into his bedroom. Before Tom shut the door, he gave Bill that warm smile that Bill was really getting used to; it almost made him jealous that his twins were in there without him... But only almost.

Despondently, Bill stalked into his older version's bedroom that suddenly seemed really lonely and sad, and began getting ready for bed.

Were his twins seriously having sex in the room next door...? Bill stared at himself in the bathroom mirror, toothbrush in his mouth, and listened to any suspicious sounds from the other room, but he could hear nothing at all. Had they gone to sleep...? Or were they just super quiet...?

With a blush, he looked away from his reflection and spit the toothpaste out; he had always thought he would be rather loud in bed, since he was generally always loud, but maybe sex was an exception? Or maybe he was usually loud but trying to be quiet for his sake?

"Ugh..." Bill grumbled into the towel that he was using to dry his face off; this was so wrong. He didn't want to think of himself in bed with his twin... and yet that was all he could think of for the rest of the restless night.

"Good morning Bill!" future Bill chirped happily as soon as Bill entered the kitchen; why the heck was he so chipper? 'He totally had sex last night, oh my gosh,' Bill thought horrified, staring at his happy future self making fruit shakes.

Bill grumbled darkly, feeling left out. Why was he feeling bad about this? It's not like he wanted to have sex with his twins, right? But they still did stuff without him and that was... sad. Bill mentally slapped himself for being so stupid.

"Hey," his future self greeted Tom who walked into the kitchen with a towel wrapped around his head; "Strawberry shake?" he asked with a suggestive smile, dancing around the kitchen with a glass full of pink shake.

Tom laughed, taking the glass from his twin before he spilled it all; "Thanks," he smiled, taking a sip from it; "It's good," he nodded, licking his lips.

"Hm, let me try some," blond Bill smiled, pulling his twin closer and shoving his tongue into his mouth. Bill nearly shrieked, looking away quickly; what the heck was wrong with him in ten years?! Tom and Bill from the future giggled and murmured something into each other's mouths, but Bill was too embarrassed to look, and instead focused on the blender that was sitting abandoned on the counter where blond Bill had left it, half filled with strawberry shake.

Did they really have to be so... open with their relationship all of a sudden?

Apparently they did, because as soon as Tom had grabbed himself some toast and sat down, older Bill curled up on his lap, loudly munching on a piece of toast. Bill wanted to kick him.

"So Bill, what are we doing today?" his future self asked cheerfully.

"No idea what the hell you two are doing, but whatever it is, I'm sure as hell not joining you," Bill grumbled darkly. He was upset that his brothers were being all lovey-dovey in front of him; he didn't want to know how happy he would be with Tom... would he really be that happy with Tom...? In ten years he certainly looked very happy...

"Aw. Don't be like that Bill," his future version cooed, pulling him over so quickly that Bill nearly fell of his chair.

"Ah Bill! Get off me!" he protested loudly, trying to squirm out of the awkward hug, but his older self just tightened his grip, squeezing the air from his lungs.

"Don't always be so grumpy. It's such a nice day — we should go outside with the dogs or something," blond Bill said cheerfully, getting off Tom's lap, all the while pulling Bill along with an arm around his neck.

"You're going to rip my head off!" Bill complained loudly.

"I will not," his older self smiled brightly, twisting his head up and giving him a sloppy kiss.

"Ugh! Bill!" Bill complained again, still trying to twist himself out of his future's grasp.

"I am going to get ready — I need to look fabulous to walk Pumba — and you guys finish the shake or it'll be all gross today later," he waved as he danced out of the kitchen together with Pumba.

"Shake?" Tom offered with a smile, holding up the remains of the pink stuff.

"Sure," Bill mumbled awkwardly, holding up a glass for Tom to pour it in before they sat down again and resumed their breakfast. "So how was the sex?" Bill asked dully, staring down at his plate while Tom gave a surprised laugh.

"Great," he chuckled and Bill lifted his gaze a bit.

"Better than with other people?" he demanded quietly.

His brother raised an eyebrow with a soft smile; "Yes, better than with other people," he confirmed.

"Really? Why?" Bill asked dubiously; Tom had bragged about some pretty awesome one night stands in the past.

"Because everyone else in my life was nothing more than a cheap thrill to distract me from what I really wanted. How good sex is usually depends on what it is that compels us to have sex with someone, rather than how much experience they might have," he shrugged, drinking what was left of his shake.

"Lousy sex with me is better than good sex with other people then?" Bill summarized, still very doubtful.

"I don't think we've ever had lousy sex... Sure, some times are better than others, but I don't think I could ever call any of them lousy," he chuckled; "I was just trying to say that the awesomeness-level of sex doesn't necessarily depend on someone's experience or knowledge on the matter."

"Oh..." Bill nodded, picking his toast apart with his hands; "Was I really bad the first time we did it?" he mumbled quietly, hanging his head low so Tom wouldn't see his blush.

His brother gave a throaty laugh; "No, not at all. Sometimes things just need to click, and with us they did... I always enjoyed the sex with you, even back when you weren't so certain of things yet... It was different, but still really great in its own way. Besides... I was horrified to do something wrong because I had wanted to be with you for so long, and was certain that I would mess things up," he laughed softly, shaking his head; "I think I might have been more nervous than you, actually."

Bill gave him a dubious look; "You were nervous to have sex? Are you kidding me?"

"Yes, I was," his twin laughed; "With other people I didn't care if I did something wrong, but with you... things were actually important. Of course there was also the fact that I had never slept with a guy before, so really — I was terrified," he finished with a small smile.

Bill also had to smile; that was definitely not what he had expected; "You're weird," he said quietly, receiving another smile from his brother.

"Yeah, maybe..." he agreed; "But in my defence — the first time we had sex, it was your idea," Tom grinned.

"What?! Seriously?" Bill asked in disbelief.

"Yup," his twin nodded while he began to put the dishes in the sink.

"Why? How did that happen?" Bill couldn't believe he would initiate sex, and with Tom no less.

"Because you wanted to, I guess," Tom chuckled; "It was a few weeks after you awoke from the coma... We had... well I'm not really sure what to call it — gotten together? only recently, so I was actually very surprised that that was what you wanted... Since you had always been waiting for... well you know... someone else," he smiled that sad smile again.

Bill knew what Tom was talking about and felt terrible; had he given Tom the impression that he wasn't what he had wanted? Even back then?

"I'm sorry," Bill murmured quietly.

"About what?" his brother asked, a bit surprised.

"I don't know... the stuff I said... I just don't know whether-"

"I'm ready to leave!" blond Bill waltzed into the kitchen with Pumba, strutting around to show off his clothes.

Bill wanted to kick his older version for always interrupting him and Tom when things were about to get serious.

"Great, let's go," Tom laughed, smiling at Bill as they followed the blond and the fat dog.


	11. Chapter 11

They drove a bit out of the city to where they usually walked the dogs, and parked on their usual spot next to the woods where they were soon joined by Ria.

"Hey guys," she waved as she got out of her car; "How's things?" she asked warily, looking back and forth between them, her gaze resting longer on Bill.

"Good," older Bill nodded; "We explained everything to Arthur, don't worry," he grinned, linking arms with her and pulling her along in front of Bill and Tom who soon fell behind a little.

"That with Ria was pretty lucky," Bill commented as he watched his older self and Ria chattering a bit farther up the dirt road.

"Yeah, she's great. She got really worried when you went missing and felt terribly guilty that you found out about us like that," Tom chuckled.

"Oh...yeah..." Bill mumbled, remembering that awful evening.

"You wanted to tell me something earlier in the kitchen before Bill walked in," his twin reminded him of earlier.

"Oh, right... um... I don't know..." he mumbled awkwardly, not entirely certain of what it was that he had wanted to say; "You were right — I did want something else... but maybe Bill was also right? Maybe... I don't know... I mean you guys are happy together, right?" he asked carefully.

"Yes, we are," Tom smiled warmly, looking up the road at Bill and Ria who were fussing over the two dogs.

"And you're not bored of him yet?" he asked, almost more careful than the first time.

Tom gave him a weird look; "No, Bill, I'm not. Nor will I be any time in the future... You know that we've always gotten along great and I have never been bored of you in any way — why should that suddenly change just because we're sleeping together?"

"I don't know... You're the one who always used to say that even though steak was your favourite food, you'd get tired of it if you had to eat it every day," Bill pointed out drily, never having been very happy with his brother's way of viewing love. Or sex.

"Well... now I'm vegetarian and couldn't care less about steak," Tom grinned.

"You know what I mean," Bill rolled his eyes, biting his lips to keep them from smiling.

"Love isn't food... Love is..." Tom was obviously trying to find the right words. 'Well this should be interesting...' Bill had never liked any explanation that Tom had given about love.

"Look, Bill, there are many butts in the world and I love to look at many of them, but your butt is my favourite because it's mine, and the only one I ever want to have," he finished with a shrug, and Bill burst out laughing.

"That is your eloquent explanation of what love is?!" he asked in between fits of laughter.

"Yes," Tom said with a firm nod; "It's the truth... We've been together for nearly ten years, and occasionally I check out someone else's ass, but that doesn't mean I would ever cheat on you — it doesn't even mean I would want to be with them — it just means that I look at them. And before you bite my head off — you do it too. Everyone does once in a while, it's normal. But the important thing is that we trust each other enough to know that. You know that no matter whom I meet, you are far more important than any hot piece of ass out there... and vice versa," he finished in a rather serious tone, given the choice of words.

Bill laughed another bit; it was such a Tom-way of saying things, but yet so different than anything he had ever heard from him. On some unusual level the whole ass-talk was almost romantic... 'Ok that's just weird'.

"What if I don't want that...?" he asked quietly, going fully serious; by now he had no idea what he wanted.

They paused and Tom gave him an odd look; "Then it's your choice. But I don't believe that's true... I know you, and I know that this is what you want... Even in ten years it will still be what you want. Why are you so strongly against this? Does Bill look so unhappy to you?"

"No," Bill shook his head, feeling somewhat awkward as they stood in the middle of the dusty road; thank god there were no other people around. "He doesn't... I just don't know if me and that Bill are the same," he tried to explain even though he knew what he was saying was rubbish: of course they were the same... But still.

"Do you honestly believe that the events of the past few weeks changed everything you want in your life? I know it's been pretty weird, but was it that bad? Not even a little bit good?" Tom asked softly, giving him a tentative smile.

"No, it wasn't all bad... I just..." Bill had no idea what he even wanted to say; part of him was really beginning to want this, while the other was scared senseless that Tom would do something really bad. "I just don't want to end up heartbroken..." he finally mumbled, staring down at his feet.

"Do you look that heartbroken in the future?" his twin asked gently, stepping a little closer to him.

"Not yet," Bill answered dejectedly.

"If we made it for ten years, do you not believe at all that we can make it?" he questioned while taking another step closer, now standing right in front of Bill who began to get a bit nervous.

"I-I guess..." Bill stuttered, staring wide eyed up at his twin who stood nearly a foot taller than him.

"Every relationship is a risk. And in this case, both our hearts are on the line, not just yours," he said softly; "I love you more than anyone ever will, and if you leave me I will be just as heartbroken as your future self if I were to leave him."

Bill swallowed loudly, trying to process all this. The fact that Tom was standing so impossibly close was making it very difficult for him to think rationally, and his words weren't helping any coherent thoughts either. Was Tom really telling the truth? Would he truly be heartbroken if they broke up...?

"I would never leave you," Bill mumbled stupidly, not even knowing what he was trying to say exactly. Did he mean leave as a brother or...?

"As I would never leave you," Tom smiled that horribly soft smile again that made Bill's knees turn into jelly; what was up with this weird version of his twin?! Bill felt as if he were stuck in a parallel universe where everything was the wrong way around; where Tom — ultimate man-whore — was suddenly a really mature, sweet, caring guy while he — super sensitive, ultimate believer in everlasting, pure love — had made out with another guy. Ok, so the other guy had been himself, and Tom had been there as well... kissing him... and his older self... At the same time. Just thinking about it made Bill blush.

And of course knowing that Tom was very aware of his blush, only made him blush more. Damn Tom and the random effects he suddenly had on him. 'What is wrong with me?!' Bill whined silently, begging his face to return to a normal temperature.

However, no matter how flustered he was, he couldn't will himself to step away from his twin because some really sick, twisted part of his pathetic heart was hoping that Tom would lean in just a little bit and kiss him, but obviously his brother had no such intention because he just stood there, smiling that messed up, adorable smile of his.

"Now what?" Bill squeaked nervously, quickly clearing his throat.

"Whatever you want," Tom smiled softly, his eyes never leaving Bill's.

Of course Bill had absolutely no idea what he wanted and really wished Tom would make this decision for him; that, and he was way too flustered to... well, kiss Tom or something.

Sadly, Tom remained unmoving, placing the reins in Bill's hands again while Bill was trying to decipher his own heart.

By now he was quite certain that he was falling for his twin at a rather alarming rate, but he also knew that this was not the same Tom who was waiting for him in the past... 'But he doesn't know that...' a little voice reminded him; the Tom from the past knew nothing of this and as soon as Bill returned, all this would be history. No matter what he did here, once he went back to the past it would all be gone. So even if he did... something here, no one but him would ever know. If it really turned out that he didn't want to be with Tom, Tom would never have to know... Once Bill returned to the past, he could decide again whether he wanted to be with his twin or not, and should he really decide against it... Well... Tom would never know what an amazing man he would grow up to be one day.

Yes, he didn't actually have to make a final choice right now; he had the chance to test the waters to see if he liked it or not, and he could make up his mind once he returned to the past.

With that very calming thought in mind, he hesitantly stood on his toes to approach his twin awkwardly, hoping he hadn't read the signals wrong and Tom wouldn't suddenly leave.

Apparently Tom had no intention to leave because he leaned down a bit, meeting Bill halfway. The soft sensation of Tom's lips was so good it almost made Bill gasp; he didn't even know how much he had wanted this, but now that he got it, it was the most incredible feeling of relief; like a deep breath on a cool summer morning.

Unable to stop himself, Bill moaned softly against his brother's delicious lips when their tongues met and slowly danced from one mouth to the other. Eagerly, he wrapped his arms around Tom's neck, pulling him closer and accidentally bumping their teeth together.

"Ow, sorry," Bill mumbled awkwardly and pulled away a bit, unsure whether he had hurt Tom or not.

His brother chuckled quietly; "Yeah that happens," he mumbled as he pulled him closer, softly bumping their teeth together again in another kiss. Bill giggled into his brother's mouth, glad that this wasn't as awkward as he had always feared the whole teeth issue would be.

It didn't take long for their kiss to turn wild and passionate again, and Bill forgot all about awkwardness while he let his hands roam freely over Tom's shoulder's, down to his surprisingly toned chest; 'When did that happen...?' Bill thought intrigued, determined to explore more of that unusual territory.

But of course it never got to that.

"Tom! Arthur!" older Bill could be heard calling, and Bill wanted to kill him. "Where are you guys?"

"Urgh," Bill groaned as he pulled away from his brother and gave him an annoyed look; "I hate myself."

Tom laughed; "Don't be so hard on yourself... You don't know what you're doing," he grinned while they began heading in the direction of Bill and Ria's calling.

"Where have you guys been?" Ria laughed once they caught up with them; "You alright Arthur? You look a bit woozy," she said with worry, holding a hand to his forehead; "Are you coming down with something?"

"Um," Bill mumbled, feeling himself blush again when he looked at Tom who was trying not to laugh.

"You're right, he does look a bit woozy," blond Bill agreed, giving his brother a surprised face.

"I'm fine!" Bill pushed Ria's hand away and straightened out his hair that Tom had messed up.

Behind Ria, Tom nodded at the older Bill who seemed to get the message because he smiled brightly and clapped his hands together; "I'm starving! We should go. Unless you're not... up for it, Arthur?" he gave Bill an innocent grin while Tom gave a snort of laughter in the background. Ria just looked confused.

Bill wanted to slap his older self while the blond wrapped an arm around his shoulder, pulling him back in the direction of the parking lot. Well at least he wasn't mad that Bill had made out with his boyfriend... at least judging by future Bill's happyface.

Just like every time when they had dinner, they went to a freakin vegetarian restaurant, but today Bill really didn't care. He was completely over the moon from the kiss earlier, and couldn't wait to do it again. Sure, they had already kissed before, but now it was different... now he knew how much he meant to Tom; at least the future Tom.

But what did that even mean...? If the Tom from the future loved him like this, did that mean he could get the Tom from the past to... become the Tom from the future? Oh this was so confusing.

Bill couldn't wait to get home, and wished that the others would hurry the hell up with their cow food so they could... do other stuff. Preferably one that involved kissing.

But of course once they actually got home, Bill was far too awkward to initiate any sort of kissing, plus it was weird because his older self was there too, so he just sat on the couch snuggling Pumba while his twins checked their emails and whatever other stuff it was that they did every evening on the computer; this was not the evening Bill had had in mind.


	12. Chapter 12

"I know that I've always been such an idiot. I wanted to tell you so often but knew I never could... There have been so many things I wanted to tell you but knew you would never understand... It's been so long I'm almost used to being miserable. So many years have gone by in which I wanted nothing more than be with you - only you - not any of those other people that I share my bed with. None of them have ever meant anything to me, though I know you probably won't believe that, and I know you deserve so much better than me... but I will always love you more than anyone else ever will," Tom whispered softly, lacing his fingers with his twins.

"Please believe me," he mumbled against Bill's ear; "I know you're waiting for the love of your life — why can't you see it's me? It's always been me, Bill... I've always been right here by your side. Come back to me," he finished in a desperate plea, caressing his brother's pale cheek while he leaned down to brush their lips together. Bill's lips were dry and chapped, and felt devoid of any life; by now he was almost used to the desolate feeling he got when kissing his brother's unconscious lips.

There was, of course, no reaction from his twin whatsoever, and so Tom rested his head on the pillow next to his brother, pulling him as close as possible.

For the past three weeks or so he had barely left his brother's side, refusing to go anywhere at all in case Bill suddenly woke up. The chances of that happening weren't very high according to the doctors, because whenever Bill should wake, he would probably drift in and out of consciousness for a while before even realizing Tom's presence, but Tom refused to give up and had practically moved into the hospital room with his brother.

By now most of Bill's bruising had gone, leaving behind only fractures and that dreadful head injury that the doctors weren't sure he would ever fully recover from. It was impossible to say how much damage had been done, and they had to wait until Bill woke up, however according to his brain waves that were being monitored regularly, Bill's brain was almost fully functional which caused great confusion as to why he wasn't waking.

Apparently sometimes even patients who were only in a light coma failed to ever wake, and eventually turned over into a vegetative state or simply died after a while. The doctors had said that most comas didn't last longer than five weeks, and if they did, the chances of the patient waking up became rather slim; of course it could still happen, but the chances became fewer after that.

It had been over three weeks since the accident now, and every day that Bill remained comatose, Tom's fear of losing him increased.

A quiet knock alerted him that someone was coming and he quickly scooted a bit away from his brother, not wanting anyone to think it was weird.

"Sweetheart?" his mother asked quietly, approaching the bed. Tom was lying with his back towards the door and was glad she couldn't see his face; he didn't want to talk to her, or see her right now.

"You need to come home some time," Simone said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I want to stay here," he said firmly.

"You haven't left this room in over a week. I really think you should come home for a night," she insisted, turning him over a bit to face her.

"I don't want to go home," Tom growled angrily, getting off the bed; "I'm staying here."

"Tom... he's not going to wake up right now," Simone tried gently, but Tom shook his head angrily.

"I'm not going to leave!" he snapped angrily, feeling bad for bitching at his mother.

"Please, sweetheart... there's nothing you can do for him here," Simone reasoned.

"There's nothing I can do for him anywhere," he said bitterly.

"You need to get some rest," she insisted.

"I can rest here," Tom gestured at the bed next to Bill's where he'd been sleeping for the past few weeks.

"I think it would be good for you to be away from here for a little bit," his mother kept on insisting and driving him crazy.

"No!" Tom said angrily; "I am never going to leave him!"

"Tom, sweetheart!" his mother placed her hands on his shoulders in alarm; "I didn't mean you should abandon him, I just meant you should come home for a bit... I'm sure Bill doesn't want you to feel this bad," she finished gently, rubbing his arms.

"I feel a lot better while I'm here," he shrugged his mother's arms off and stood behind his twin's bed, refusing to leave; he didn't care how boring it was here, or how disgusting the food was; he wanted to be here every second just in case Bill should wake up.

Eventually Simone sighed heavily and nodded, obviously understanding that she couldn't change his mind anyway. "Well if there is anything you need, let me know. I'm going to go home now and I'll be back tomorrow, ok?"

Tom nodded, watching her leave. He didn't care how long Bill remained comatose — he would stay here until Bill either woke up or died. The thought of his twin's death made him want to vomit, and he quickly crawled back on the bed with his brother who was attached to all sorts of wires and bottles that ensured he carried on living properly.

No matter how much time he spent here, he couldn't get used to seeing his cheerful, lively brother so weak and silent; he wanted to hear his endless ranting and laughing, and see his radiant smile again.

"Wake up and I promise I will be different... Don't leave me like this. Don't leave me before I can tell you what you mean to me," he whispered in his brother's ear, not entirely certain he was telling the truth; would he truly confess his feelings to his brother when he woke up? ...If he woke up?

Part of him wanted to more than ever, but deep down he knew he would never bring up the courage; not just because he was too scared of being rejected, but also because he was too scared of what it would do to Bill; a secret like that would destroy their life.

~*~

"Alright, I'm off to bed," Tom finally said, closing his laptop and getting up with a yawn.

Both Bills had been going through Bill's Instagram where older Bill was showing him completely random pictures that meant nothing to Bill but were very entertaining nonetheless.

"Wait for me," blond Bill called, placing the laptop aside and getting up as well; "You weren't thinking of sleeping without me, now were you?" the future Bill giggled as he reached his twin, wrapping his arms around his neck and giving him a lazy kiss.

Tom grinned in return, sliding his hands up blond Bill's shirt; "I wouldn't dream of it," he chuckled into the kiss.

Bill awkwardly looked back at the laptop; they were so doing that on purpose, he was sure of it. "Didn't you do that yesterday?" he asked in annoyance.

His older self laughed; "What, you think we only have sex once a week?"

Tom shook his head with a laugh, pulling blond Bill out of the living room; "Goodnight Bill!" they giggled their way into Tom's bedroom, leaving Bill abandoned in the living room.

"Night," Bill mumbled dejectedly, knowing they couldn't hear him anymore anyway. He knew what their plan was — he knew they were just trying to make him jealous — make him want what they had... The problem was that despite knowing that, he was falling for it; he was actually utterly jealous that they were there, all happy and cuddly and... doing whatever it is that they were doing without him, while he sat on the couch... with a snoring Pumba as company.

With a sad sigh, Bill closed the laptop to go to the Bills' room and get ready for bed. As he passed Tom's door, he stopped to listen for a second but all he could hear was quiet music somewhere. 'They're totally having sex again' Bill groaned mentally, slouching into his room.

He knew he should actually be happy for his older self; a relationship like that was exactly what he had always wanted — Tom was exactly what he had always wanted — but he found himself being jealous and miserable instead. Of course there was also the fact that he was now crushing on Tom quite heavily, and the fact that Tom was having sex with... well... himself, but in ten years, was pretty awful.

Then there was still the problem that he had no idea how he felt about... himself. It wasn't at all like it had been with Tom; kissing his twin filled his stomach with butterflies while kissing himself was just... really awesome. He was quite certain that whatever was going on between himself and himself was definitely not an 'in love' thing, but that with Tom... that was definitely approaching that very quickly.

The Tom from the future had turned out to be so considerate and affectionate, and everything that Bill had ever wanted in a partner. Why hadn't the young Tom ever been so gentle and mature...? And if he had been, would Bill really have fallen for him...? Or was he only in love with Tom because he now knew how much Tom loved him? 

No, that couldn't be it either... Tom was just amazing all of a sudden. Somehow he wished Tom would have always been like that; maybe then things would have been different... Maybe they would already be together in the past... Or not. Who knew?

With a frustrated groan he finally dropped into bed after having brushed his teeth and changed into the oversized old shirt he wore to sleep; this was the new use Tom's old, huge shirts had found in the future.

As he lay there, he listened intently for sounds again, but there was nothing to be heard at all. He wished his older version would be here to cuddle with him so he wouldn't feel so forgotten, but no... his older self was in the room next door having sex with Bill's crush. 'Stupid Bill' Bill thought darkly, cursing himself in ten years.

After another 2 or 3 minutes — which seemed like 2 or 3 hours — had passed, Bill crawled out of bed and sauntered back into the living room to get Pumba; if he couldn't cuddle with himself at least he wanted a fat dog to keep him company. However as he passed Tom's door, he stopped again to listen to whatever was happening in there; just like before there was no sound other than from the music.

Though he actually intended to go to the living room to get Pumba, he hesitated and stared at the door; behind there he was having sex with his brother... while he stood out here all alone and sad. That wasn't fair; how dare he have sex with his brother in ten years and just leave him all alone out here.

He had the horrible desire to walk in to see what they were doing, but wasn't sure if he was brave enough; besides they might have locked the door... This situation was just like the one where his older version had snuck out of bed at night and Bill had initially thought they were doing something weird but found them only cuddling; back then he had actually believed there was nothing weird going on between them... but only for a short while because soon after that he had caught them, in that very room, making out on the bed. The same bed they were having sex on right now... just like yesterday... Bill was going crazy jealousy.

With a quiet groan he took another step closer to the door, listening again, but still nothing. Should he go in...? What if it was locked because they didn't want him in there? What if it wasn't locked and he walked in on them having sex?! 'What the hell are you doing here?! Just go back to bed!' Bill yelled at himself, but instead of listening to reason, he slowly reached for the handle, carefully testing to see if it was locked. It wasn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuunnnnnnnn!!! It's getting serious.....


	13. Chapter 13

Soundless and breathless, Bill pushed open the door to venture into Tom's dimly lit room. He had been prepared to find all sorts of insane, twisted things but instead he found absolutely nothing. His twins weren't in bed; or in the room for that matter.

"Hello?" Bill whispered nervously, stepping a little farther into the room. Were they in the bathroom?

A soft tapping alerted him and he saw his older version through the glass that led out onto the balcony; future Bill was waving at him to come over.

With a deep breath, Bill chased away the nervousness while he walked over to his twins; why was he feeling oddly disappointed...?

Both twins were sitting on the bench, snuggled together with a thin blanket while smoking.

"Ew, what are you guys doing?" Bill asked in disapproval, referring to the smoking that he still didn't agree on.

"Sit with us!" his future self invited, scooting a bit away from his twin and patting the bench between them.

"...you guys aren't naked under that, right?" Bill asked cautiously, not sure if he wanted to crawl under a blanket with his naked twins; had they just finished having sex? He knew all about the 'smoking after sex part'.

Both his twins burst out laughing; "No! Now sit here!" his older self pulled the covers away to make space for him between them. It was actually true: they were both still dressed in the same clothes they had been wearing earlier for dinner. Had they not had sex sat all yet...? What were they waiting for...?

Awkwardly, Bill crawled under the blanket and squished himself between his twins; blond Bill immediately wrapped his arms around him, giving him the hug that he had been missing earlier.

"You smell gross," Bill complained, sniffing at the cigarette and his future version. It wasn't actually all that true; unlike most people, Bill actually liked the smell of cigarettes, but since everyone always said it was gross, he went along with that as well.

His older self gasped loudly while Tom laughed; "Shut it Tom, you don't smell any better than me, so hah!" he pouted, slapping Tom's arm somewhere behind Bill's back.

Tom just chuckled while taking the last drag of his cigarette before extinguishing it in the ashtray that stood on the windowsill behind them. "Maybe not," he grinned wickedly, reaching over to the older Bill to take away his finished cigarette and extinguishing it; "But I don't care if you smell gross," he smiled slyly, reaching back again, this time to pull him closer in a kiss that ended right over Bill's head while he ducked away a bit to give them space.

From his unusual position underneath their kiss, Bill shamelessly watched their lips and tongues touching; their piercings flashed occasionally when the light from inside hit them right, making Bill somewhat hypnotized. He began getting that weird, warm feeling again and felt his heartrate increasing for unknown reasons; somehow there was something very alluring about watching himself kissing Tom. Of course there was also the fact that the last time they had been in a situation like this, he had ended up kissing both of them; something he wouldn't mind at all doing again now.

Apparently his twins had read his mind, because soon enough they broke their kiss and leaned towards him, the older Bill being the first to claim Bill's lips again; somehow Bill had always imagined Tom to be the more dominant one, but oddly enough he found himself rather intrigued with the twist. He loved being in control of things - apparently in every aspect of life.

Blond Bill's studded tongue immediately lapped at his lips, demanding entrance that Bill gladly granted. His future mouth tasted like cigarettes and those weird vegan cheddar puffs that his older self had eaten earlier; it was an unusually good combination, in Bill's opinion. Even if it was vegan cheese... wth is up with that anyway?!

This time it only took him a second to get comfortable with the kiss, and soon enough he returned his own kisses wholeheartedly.

He didn't miss the funny feeling about being glad his twin's hadn't had sex tonight; for some odd reason, even if it was silly, he had the feeling they hadn't because they didn't want to exclude him. Of course that was probably ridiculous and had nothing to do with it, but Bill really liked that thought. He had barely wanted to admit to himself how hurt he was at the fact that his twins were together and left him out.

As much as Bill loved kissing himself, he also felt Tom's body right next to his, reminding him that he also wanted to kiss Tom; it was just impossible to stick to only one in a situation like this.

Breathlessly, he broke the kiss with his older self, staring wide eyed into his own, nearly make-up-less eyes; his future self smiled encouragingly, giving him another soft kiss before releasing him to go look for Tom who's head was resting on his arm while he watched them intently.

The situation was a little unsettling for Bill because Tom, again, made no attempt to do anything at all, and just smiled at him; why did stupid Tom always have to leave things up to him?! Couldn't he be like Bill and just take whatever he wanted? It was so much easier not having to decide things for himself; Bill growled internally.

The future Bill gave him a gentle nudge with his nose against Bill's neck while he gave him a hug from behind now that Bill was facing Tom. Still a bit nervous, Bill moved the few inches towards Tom who tilted his head slightly so they had a perfect kissing position; 'That mean's 'green light', right?' Bill thought nervously right before bringing their lips together. Given the fact that Tom parted his lips and closed his eyes, it probably did mean that, and Bill immediately regained his confidence, shoving his tongue past his brother's welcoming lips.

Just like his twin, Tom tasted like cigarettes and cheddar puffs, and though they had been the identical items, he tasted a little bit different than Bill; he tasted like Tom.

A few seconds into the heated kiss, Tom pulled him closer and Bill crawled onto his lap, now sitting astride with his naked legs dangling by Tom's sides while their tongues finally returned to the kiss that the older Bill had interrupted earlier today.

Tom's arms wrapped around him, caging him in a warm embrace that protected him from the chilly night air which indicated that the blanket had nearly fallen to the floor. The other source of heat was future Bill's mouth which had begun playing around with Bill's ear again, causing that crazy stampede of goosebumps that ran across his whole body.

With an involuntary whimper, Bill broke the kiss to catch his breath and/or kiss his older self's teasing mouth again. Future Bill immediately complied, digging his jeweled fingers into Bill's hair and gently twisted his head to the side so they had a better kissing angle.

The rough kiss with himself only lasted mere seconds because future Bill suddenly got up and headed to the door, giving them a flirtatious wink before disappearing inside with a giggle.

Bill looked at Tom, not really sure what his older self was trying to imply with that. Whatever message the blond had sent, Tom seemed to have gotten it because he got up just as sudden as his twin earlier, lifting Bill up in the process.

Bill squawked a bit in alarm, holding on to Tom's neck and wrapping his legs around his waist while Tom laughed, his hands resting on Bill's ass while he carried him inside. Bill was a little bit too aware of Tom's hands against his butt, and began getting slightly self-conscious; it was actually the first time someone just... randomly put their hands there; it was odd. Especially because he was only wearing underwear and a huge shirt which hung over Tom's hands and didn't do anything at all to protect him from... whatever.

As they entered the room, Bill twisted his head around to see where his older self might be and spotted him sprawled out lazily on the bed, arm behind his head and watching them with an eager expression. It was an expression that Bill had never seen on himself, and didn't know how interpret; what was that look? It was intense, longing and playful at the same time.

Only now did Bill realize the situation he was currently in. He was in bed with his twins who intended on having sex tonight; with him though?!

Tom sat him down on the bed where he was immediately greeted by his older self who wrapped his arms around him from behind, pulling him completely up on the bed while twisting his head so they could kiss again.

As nervous as Bill had been earlier on the balcony, it didn't come close to what he felt right now; what was he getting himself into?! Was he ready for this?

Of course he wasn't. Who's ready to have sex with his twin and himself from 10 years in the future?! Well actually that really wasn't the problem - the problem was that Bill didn't think he was ready for sex. Or was he...?

Even though he had thought about sex so often lately, the people on his mind had always been his twins — he had never been involved in the act himself. He didn't want to have sex with his twins. Well... maybe he did but... No, way too awkward. They knew each other so well and... they knew what they were doing, while Bill was completely confused and scared and... No way in hell could he just have sex with them. Especially not both at the same time! That was just wrong.

Bill's horrified panic was interrupted by Tom's hands that began caressing his legs, beginning at his left ankle. He watched mesmerized as his older twin, who was now also seated on the bed, gently lifted his foot to rest on his shoulder, and began kissing along Bill's calf, gently nipping his way up.

The older Bill began nibbling around on his ear again, and Bill slumped against his future self, still trying to determine what it was that he actually wanted while Tom kissed further and further up until his breath tickled Bill's inner tight and he laughed involuntarily, immediately biting his tongue in horror; was it allowed to laugh during sex...?

He gave his older self a horrified look, but the blond Bill just laughed heartedly, retreating from behind him so Bill now lay flat on his back on the bed. "Yeah I know," his older self giggles against Bill's lips; "I'm still totally ticklish there."

Bill just managed to nod a bit because his future tongue was too deep inside his mouth for him to be able to say something.

Again, older Bill's kiss didn't take long and he broke away again, turning to Tom who was now lying next to Bill; their kiss didn't last too long either, and soon Bill was able to kiss Tom again who leaned over him, caressing his cheek while Bill wrapped his arms around his neck and shoulders to draw him closer.

Tom was still fully dressed and Bill really began getting annoyed with all the clothes his older twin was wearing; he wanted to be able to touch his skin, but wasn't sure if he was allowed to or not. Why was he feeling so awkward around them...? They were his twin and himself! But still... would Tom mind...?

Tentatively he trailed his hands a little lower, cracking an eye open to see if Tom did anything, but he didn't seem fazed at all so Bill cautiously slipped his hands inside Tom's shirt to touch his warm skin.

Apparently he wasn't the only one with that idea, because his hand suddenly bumped into someone else's which began shoving the annoying clothes out of the way. Bill opened his eyes to look at his older self's playful smiled while he broke the kiss with Tom so the older Bill could pull Tom's shirt over his head. Tom sat back on his heels with a laugh, pulling Bill into a sitting position as well, and proceeded to kiss him again; Bill immediately snuggled into the warmth of his twin's bare chest, again noticing how much Tom's body had matured over the past ten years. 'Yeah, I can so get used to this.'

That only served to remind him that he was only 16 and they were... well... exactly ten years older than him, and he slowly broke the kiss with Tom again.

With a soft groan and a deep breath, he rested his head against his older self who was sitting behind him, while he stared up at Tom, still trying to figure out where this was headed and if it was a mistake or not. Was this really what he wanted?

"Bill?" his future self gently mumbled into his ear, his arms still wrapped safely around his shoulders to hold him tightly against himself. "You know you can tell me what you want," he offered gently; "We would never do something you feel you're not ready for. You just need to tell us." Tom agreed with his twin with a nod, smiling gently down at Bill who weird moved his head from one side to the other, looking back and forth between the blond behind him and his twin in front of him.

As always lately, Bill had absolutely no idea what he wanted. Of course Tom would never know once he returned to the past, but he himself would always know. He only had one first time - did he really want it to be with... well... these two? Did he really want it to be with Tom?


	14. Chapter 14

"I don't know what I want," Bill finally admitted; might as well be honest.

The older twins exchanged a smile before the blond spoke; "Why don't we just see where it takes us, and as soon as you don't want to anymore, you'll-"

"You'll continue and I'll watch," Bill finished with an unusual playful feeling rising in his chest; he didn't actually want his twins to have sex without him, but he also wasn't sure if he was ready for it right now...

The twins both laughed in surprise and Bill was immediately assaulted with a fiery kiss from himself; "You're such a lil perv," his older self giggled into his mouth, making him blush even more than before. Tom was also laughing, his hands still laced with Bill's.

His future version soon pulled Tom close for a kiss that ended in another hot round of exchanges between the three of them before the older Bill slowly slid to the side, gently guiding Bill closer to the headboard of the bed while Tom and Bill carried on kissing; soon Bill was comfortably lying on the pillows with Tom half on top of him, and the blond nuzzling around Bill's nick, his hand slowly trailing up his leg, past his knee and towards his thighs.

His future's hand made him a bit nervous, but then he remembered that this was, in fact, his own hand; no one knew his body better than himself, so there really wasn't a reason to be anxious; the older Bill knew exactly what he would find on his journey, after all.

Bill eagerly explored Tom's chest, shoulders, arms and every other part he could reach from his position with one hand, while the other absently played with his future's hair that felt so different than his own, longer one.

It was hard to concentrate on what his hands were doing because of the passionate kiss with Tom and the insane tingling from his future tongue and mouth that refused to detach from his neck, shoulder or ear. 'He's totally giving me a hicky, I just know it,' Bill thought dizzily.

Against Bill's expectations, his future's hand didn't actually touch him...there but moved further up, gently rasping his manicured nails along Bill's sides; now that was something Bill found utterly amazing. The rough scratching left his body tingling with an unusual sensation he had never felt before and he shivered a bit, a low mewl escaping his throat.

Obviously his older self knew exactly what he enjoyed because he carried on, slowly and teasingly scraping his way along Bill's sensitive body which was so torn between the many origins of pleasure that he became disoriented and confused.

Swaying in his delirious pleasure, the only thing that was really beginning to bother Bill was the fact that his future self was still fully dressed, protecting him from Bill's aimless groping; weakly he tugged on his future self's irritating clothes, hoping he would get the message without Bill having to detach himself from his twin's lips.

The older Bill laughed quietly, apparently having understood very well and sat up slowly, causing Tom to look over with a raised eyebrow, breaking the kiss with Bill anyway. Oh well.

The blond smirked at his twins while he began to remove his long sleeved shirt, and Bill had the strange desire to help him. Should he...? He had taken his own clothes off a million times - it wouldn't really matter, right?

Tentatively he sat up, pushing his future's clothes up and over his head, curiously eyeing all those awesome tattoos again that he was dying to touch. His self smiled encouragingly, and Bill carefully placed his hand over the heart tattoo; it was morbid and creepy, and Bill loved it. He felt the very faint outlines of the scars underneath the ink that barely stood out against the skin which felt so much softer than his own. Of course that made no sense because it was his own skin just ten years older, but still. He really wished his skin would be all silky and smooth, like the one from people in books and movies – or his future self's – but to him it just felt like ordinary, lame skin with a lot of imperfections that he didn't manage to spot in his older self.

Blond Bill smiled encouragingly, letting him explore around to his heart's desire while Tom leaned against the headboard, watching in amusement.

Bill was fascinated; he hadn't really known many people with tattoos before, and had of course never been able to randomly touch them, so he used the opportunity to discover the body he would have in ten years. It was quite nice, he had to admit; maybe his future self had had a point, and he really should start working out at some point... It seemed to pay off. 'But I'm so lazy... no way. Ok maybe someday... I don't know,' Bill debated with himself while he admired the body he would once come to have.

Soon enough, future Bill crawled up towards Tom, dragging Bill along with him, and began to kiss his twin again while Bill watched, still fascinated.

It didn't take long before Bill was invited by his future's hand roughly pulling him towards them and causing him to fall square on top of Tom who laughed in surprise, obviously not having noticed what his twin was up to.

"Bill!" Bill grumbled, glaring at his older self who just laughed, collapsing next to Tom and leaving Bill on top of things, but not for long because soon Tom pulled him closer – for the first time initiating a kiss between them.

While Bill was busy kissing his twin, the other Bill was rummaging around with Tom as well, though Bill didn't notice what he was doing until his legs brushed against his twin's, now fully naked ones; obviously his future self intended to move things along a bit... Bill got nervous again, though his excitement won the emotional battle, tempting him to explore this new, exposed territory.

Leaving Tom's lips in his future's care, Bill slowly trailed down Tom's body, burning the image of his chest and stomach into his mind; he knew that his days here were numbered and he wanted to soak up as much as possible.

His twin's fingers were curled in his hair, adapting to his movements while he slowly moved lower until he reached the only part of his brother that was still dressed.

Of course by now Bill was also quite turned on by this twisted situation, but he was still wearing a really long shirt that hid said fact - unlike Tom who didn't seem to care at all about how exposed he was in his state, and just carried on making out with Bill's future self.

While Bill was still busy staring shamelessly, Tom suddenly began to laugh, which caused Bill to quickly come back up, blushing furiously; obviously Tom had noticed what Bill had paused to look at.

"What?" the blond murmured lazily against Tom's grinning lips.

Tom pulled Bill gently by his hair until they were face to face and gave him a wicked grin that caused Bill's insides to flip upside down before his lips were crushed against his twin's in a heated kiss.

Without any warning, Bill's supporting hand was suddenly pulled out from underneath him and he fell flat on top of Tom again, pressing their aroused bodies tightly together. Bill gave a surprised yelp, receiving a sinister giggle from his older self who was obviously the culprit of this position he was now in - however before he managed the put a bit of space between himself and Tom, his twin's hands wound around his body and held him firmly in place.

Though he had been quite close to his twin before, pressing against him when he was so turned on caused Bill's body to heat up a few more degrees, and soon he didn't want to move anymore; the unusual pressure on his erection that was trapped between their bodies was actually very alluring, and nearly made him grind against his twin.

His future self twisted his head around again for another kiss while Tom's hands began to casually caress down his back, slowly pulling his huge shirt up until they were able to slip inside to touch his skin.

Bill couldn't focus on the kiss with himself anymore because his twin's hands began to caress his ass, gently groping him through the thin fabric of his underwear. It was alarmingly pleasant.

With a quiet giggle, his future self broke the kiss to give Bill a bit more air; this whole situation had caused his breathing to become somewhat erratic.

Of course the blond didn't stay unoccupied for long because his hands soon found their way up Bill's shirt, pushing it further up until Bill heatedly complied and lifted himself a bit off of Tom so his future self could dispose of the garment, leaving him as little dressed as Tom was.

Even though he wasn't cold at all, he suddenly shivered at the contact of his bare chest against Tom's; it was actually the first time he had ever been so close to someone while wearing so little. Again he found that it was quite pleasant; it was a lot better than he thought something so simple could be.

While he snuggled into Tom's warm chest, his future self began kissing along his back, leisurely massaging his shoulders and neck, or caressing around randomly; the touch was very comforting for Bill who was still quite nervous due to Tom's hands that were playing around with the waistband of his underwear, occasionally slipping inside to caress him teasingly.

Eventually his future's hands began pulling his shoulders to the side, rolling him next to Tom to give him another kiss. Bill sighed into the kiss with himself while Tom laughed quietly.

"You know what you wanted ten years ago, hm?" Tom grinned at the older Bill who was pushing him down with a hand on his shoulder and a wicked grin.

"Of course I do," the blond sniggered naughtily.

It took Bill a few seconds to understand what his twins were talking about, but by the time Tom began licking down his stomach and caressing his thighs, he slowly began to realize what his intention was and began to blush while his older self laughed heartedly in between their kiss.

Of course that was a kiss Bill couldn't focus on at all because his future self suddenly slid his hand down his stomach, to his underwear and inside it to stroke him. Bill gave a surprised squeak into his self's mouth; even though that was his own hand, it was absolutely and completely different from touching himself. It was thrilling and scary, and made his stomach twist into bubbly knots of excitement.

While Bill whimpered disoriented into the curve of the blonde's neck, this one teasingly began pushing his boxers down with the aid of Tom's hand which discarded the item somewhere a moment later.

Bill felt completely exposed and embarrassed, and hid his face in his future's hair to avoid looking at them; thankfully neither of them felt like making it awkward for him, and curled up close on each side of him, leaving him safely trapped in a tangle of their limbs.

Desire soon took over his anxiety when his twins' hands began caressing him all over the place, willing him to enjoy the twisted intimacy, and he carefully lifted his head a bit to find his future lips again for a reassuring kiss while (presumably) Tom's hand found its way between his legs again to carry on with the blonde's earlier task.

Wantonly he moaned into his self's mouth, losing himself in the gentle touch that teased his hard-on mercilessly. For a few seconds he thought it was the best thing he had ever felt, until something wet suddenly whisked over him, making him jump from the unexpected feeling; it was Tom's malicious tongue that began licking him playfully, making him groan deliriously.

Since Bill was unable to keep making out with himself, his future version lazily kissed down to his chest where he nibbled around until Bill's body was covered in goosebumps.

Incoherently, Bill dug his fingers into his future's hair, trying to focus on something other than the mind shattering pleasure that was bringing him to the edge way too fast for his own taste; he wanted this to last forever, but at this rate it would be over far too soon, particularly thanks to his brother's skillful tongue that twirled around the tip of his cock a few times before suddenly taking him into his mouth.

A shaky moan tore from his throat at his brother's sudden warm embrace that sent a new heat wave through his stomach. Why did his brothers have to be so bloody good at this?

Even though he didn't want it to end so soon, he felt himself approaching his release and groaned partly in pleasure and partly in frustration.


	15. Chapter 15

However, Tom seemed to have no intention to end things so quickly because he released him just as he was about to climax.

Bill whined indignantly, not agreeing with Tom's actions at all but his older twin just laughed softly, kissing his way up Bill's body, pausing somewhere along the way to make out with Bill's older self. While his twins kissed somewhere above his chest, Bill took the opportunity to catch his breath and calm his raging pulse a little bit; no matter how often he saw himself kissing his brother, it always intrigued him. There was something utterly erotic about the situation, and Bill lazily combed his fingers through his twins' hair, holding them together in their kiss.

Fascinated as always, he watched their tongues sliding against each other, his future tongue always running over that piercing on Tom's lip; obviously he would still really enjoy that part even in ten years. There was something really comforting in seeing himself so turned on in the future. Maybe this really was what he wanted...

It wasn't long before Tom kissed his way up to Bill's eager mouth while the blond kissed his way in the other direction, coming dangerously close to Bill's erection and making him shiver in anticipation just as his and Tom's lips met again in a passionate kiss that ended in a whimpered moan from Bill when his older self suddenly began licking him.

Getting sucked off by yourself was definitely something out of the ordinary, Bill decided when his future self began playing around with him; this was also different than when Tom was doing it. Just like with the kissing, his future self was far more aggressive and playful, licking and nibbling around until Bill wanted to scream at himself.

His future's hard tongue-stud rubbed against his erection in rhythm with the sucking sensation that his older self was making, causing Bill's erratic moaning to become worse, and he interrupted the kiss with Tom who was chuckling softly.

"Hm, yeah," Tom moaned against his lips; "I love it when you do that. You give the best head ever."

Bill felt himself blushing and was astounded that his blood was capable of finding its way to his cheeks right now. His own laughter vibrated around his hard-on when his older self laughed at Tom's dirty remark, making him twitch from the unusual, delicious sensation.

"Shut up, Tom," Bill moaned distractedly, earning himself another snigger from his twin before he moved further down, licking and biting around on Bill's nipple that only made his state worse.

Not caring what his brothers might think of him, Bill mewled and moaned loudly, coming so close to his climax but being denied it by his older self various times over; what the hell was he doing to himself?!

"Bill..." Bill whimpered desperately, hoping his brothers would finally have mercy on him.

"What?" his older self murmured softly once he released Bill's sensitive cock.

"Stop it," Bill groaned, grasping a handful of his future's hair and dragging him towards his lips.

The blond grinned; "As you wish," he chuckled before shoving his tongue into Bill's mouth; Bill just kissed back weakly, trying to regain some composure. Of course he wasn't very successful because now Tom took over the blonde's earlier task, suddenly taking Bill entirely into his mouth in one smooth motion that made Bill cry out in surprised pleasure.

His future self giggled quietly and began to move down as well, kissing along his sensitive sides and trailing his fingertips across Bill's skin, leaving tingling marks all over the place.

Older Bill lay down next to him on his stomach, his lips capturing Tom's which had left Bill's erection for a moment to greet his twin whose hand began lazily playing with Bill's weeping cock.

"My turn," the blond sniggered into Tom's mouth right before pulling away; Tom chuckled softly and spread Bill's legs a bit further apart, pushing his right leg up with a hand under his knee.

Bill felt extremely exposed and self-conscious with both his brothers down there doing... whatever it was that they were doing - he wasn't sure he wanted to know. However his brother's weight on one leg and his hand holding the other made it impossible for Bill to move, so he just remained there, feeling completely awkward and uncomfortable. Though not for too long because his future mouth soon made him forget all about it.

It was another round of sweet torture that had Bill moaning uncontrollably and rocking his hips against the blonde's mouth that was deliberately teasing him, bringing him close to completion once more.

Just as Bill thought his older self would finally let him cum, Tom's tongue made him scream as it began rimming him. This was far from what Bill was used to or prepared for, and he immediately tried to move away from the crazy, unknown sensation but his future's hand against his stomach forced him back down onto the mattress, impended him from going anywhere.

Bill moaned hysterically, fisting the covers and arching his back just to let himself fall limply against the bed again, surrendering to the incredible feelings his twins were giving him.

As if his future's teasing tongue around his cock hadn't been enough, Tom's wicked one lapping at his entrance was enough to make him scream.

Even though the sensation was so foreign, it made him feel incredible and he began getting the insane desire to feel someone inside him. What the hell were they doing to him?

They sure as hell had a very good argument in the whole 'future with or without Tom' issue, and if this is what his future looked like... Bill wasn't sure he ever wanted to live another minute without it. Of course that was also due to his lust filled mind that was unable to think reasonably at the moment and really just wanted to feel more of that sick, twisted pleasure that was so wrong and yet righter than anything else he had ever done.

At that moment he was certain that this was everything he had ever wanted and would get together with his twin as soon as he returned to the past; of course that was just right now though - things were always weird while one was in a situation such as this.

Not that this situation was one that people were usually in but... the whole sex thingy. Not the time traveling, having sex with yourself thing. Or your twin. That was really weird too.

By now Bill was uncertain who was doing what to him because he had lost track of what his twins were doing - not that it really mattered to him right now - and after a few more minutes of life changing pleasure, Bill finally let is orgasm overtake him.

Deliriously, he moaned loudly while his entire body trembled from the long-overdue release that his brothers finally coaxed out of him in the most delicious way ever, leaving him shivering and gasping.

Once the last wave of pleasure had rolled off his body, he let his head fall limply to the side, trying to focus his vision on the room but it was somewhat cloudy and his head was spinning; quickly he closed his eyes just as he felt his brothers lying down on either side of him, cuddling up with their warm bodies against his which suddenly felt so cold despite having been sweating so much a minute ago.

Someone pulled a blanket over them, and Bill snuggled into the warm bodies surrounding him, trying to warm his freezing fingers and feet while his heartbeat slowly began to decrease.

"Aren't you guys gonna have sex now?" Bill slurred lazily when someone suddenly turned off the light. 

His twins laughed quietly next to him; "Hm, I don't know. Tom, what do you think, should we have sex right now?" his future self asked amused.

"I don't know... I'm kinda lazy," his other twin replied with a small shrug, making Bill's self laugh again.

"Me too... We should postpone it until tomorrow," the blond nodded, snuggling his face into Bill's neck.

"Mhm. Yeah. Tomorrow," Tom mumbled, wrapping his arm around Bill's waist to draw him a little closer.

 

Even though Bill was physically exhausted, he was unable to fall asleep because his mind kept turning around the earlier events; as much as he had enjoyed it, he still wasn't sure if he had made the right decision. The more he got involved with his twins, the more he fell for Tom but wasn't sure if that was actually what he wanted; of course he wanted Tom right now, but he just wasn't sure if wanting Tom was what he really wanted. It seemed so... dangerous. Completely putting aside the whole illegal aspect of it, Bill couldn't shake the dreadful feeling that Tom would cheat on him or leave him or whatever.

Generally Bill was always very brave, optimistic and had faith in love, but he wasn't sure if that faith applied to Tom... Which was odd because he trusted his twin more than anyone else in the world and they had always said that they would always be together... Though this was not the way in which Bill had meant it.

Was it the way Tom had always meant it? Already so many years ago? Were they really meant to be...?

Bill really wanted to believe so but wasn't sure he could.

Unable to find any rest anyway, Bill quietly snuck up and climbed over his brothers trying not to wake them, and headed for the kitchen once he had found his shirt in the dark room; Pumba was still lying on the couch, snoring.

Still a bit shaky, he took a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water that he drank down in one single gulp - he felt completely dehydrated.

"Hey," his future self suddenly showed up in the kitchen; "I'm thirsty too," he grinned, taking the glass from him and filling it again.

"Oh," Bill laughed awkwardly, feeling a bit embarrassed about earlier.

"Everything ok?" the blond asked once he drank half a glass.

"Yeah, fine," Bill nodded quickly and gave himself his best smile.

Obviously he knew himself too well for that though; "What's wrong?" he asked himself concerned.

"Nothing... I just can't sleep," Bill sighed while leaning against the kitchen counter.

The older Bill frowned; "...Are you upset because of what happened earlier? I was pretty certain I hadn't read my own signs wrong," he said thoughtfully, giving him a scrutinizing look.

Bill laughed again, feeling himself blush; "Nono, you read all signs right. That wasn't it," he assured himself quickly.

"Then what's the problem?" he urged.

"I don't know... I'm just wondering how I'm going to deal with this when I get back home... It's only like... two weeks or something... And then I have to talk to Tom... who's already in love with me, right?" Bill asked awkwardly; he wasn't sure he could have that conversation with his twin who had always been so... brotherly; "It's just weird because... I mean... well with you guys it's different because... you're so different," Bill mumbled stupidly, not sure he was making any sense; "But Tom- the one from the past, is really different - from you guys, I mean. We've never been anything but brotherly to each other... How am I supposed to suddenly... whatever? I don't know," he finished dully.

"Tom loves you. Already back then. Whatever you do, he'll be fine with it," future Bill smiled encouragingly but Bill wasn't convinced.

"But how do I bring that up? What am I supposed to say to him? 'Oh by the way, I know you're in love with me because you told me ten years from now. Oh and we also had sex,' or what?" Bill groaned in frustration.

Apparently his future self didn't find his problem all that serious because he just laughed; "Well maybe not like that, and besides... we didn't actually have sex. Yet," he added mischievously, earning himself a horrified look from Bill.

"Bill!" he grumbled, slapping his older arm weakly.

"What? I'm just saying... I don't know if you should tell him that you were here or not... But whatever you do chose to do or say to him, you can be sure that he won't turn you down. And that's what people are usually afraid of, right? That's the reason they are stupid and never confess their love for others... They're afraid to be rejected," he sighed dramatically; "It's the reason Tom never told you, but you have the advantage of already knowing that you won't be rejected. So what are you afraid of?" the blond smiled brightly.

"Ugh... I don't know," Bill mumbled tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

"Come on... It'll be fine, I promise," his future self pulled him into a hug which was somewhat awkward for Bill because he was semi naked, and his future self was completely so; when had he gotten so shameless anyway?

"Let's just go back to bed before Tom wakes up, ok?" he encouraged with another smile.

Bill just nodded with another sigh and followed himself back into Tom's bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that the sex part took so long o.o I tried to hurry up, but you know how slow i am with story development.... I hope it didnt get boring. (sorry if it did)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed ^^


	16. Chapter 16

Bill rubbed his eyes and blinked sleepily into the bright light that shone in through the curtains; he was feeling great. Not just normal great but like, insanely great. 

For no reason at all, he smiled randomly as he stumbled up from the bed he had shared with his brothers last night, being well rested despite last night's... exertions. 

"Morning Billy!" his future self greeted cheerfully. 

"Ew, don't call me that," Bill snorted with a laugh while he sat down at the messy table where his brothers were still busy eating. 

"Aw, you don't like it when I call you Billy?" the blond grinned through his cereals. 

"No, Billy, I don't," he answered drily, earning himself a laugh from Tom who rolled his eyes. 

"You know, that doesn't bother me as much as it used when I was your age," the older Bill said thoughtfully. 

"Uh-huh," Bill said doubtfully; "You're generally weird."

"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that," his older self smiled brightly, drinking the remaining milk from his bowl before getting up; "I'ma get dressed so we can leave!" he said excitedly while he dashed into his room. 

"Where are we going...?" Bill asked suspiciously; Tom didn't seem to be in any sort of hurry and calmly munched away on his cheese toast. 

"To the pet store. They just got their new collection of dog items and-"

"Oh my god! We need to buy new stuff for Pumba!" Bill jumped up from his chair in excitement. 

"Um, yeah, we-"

"He needs a new collar and leash, and we need a new doggy bed because his old one is really gross and ugly and full of hair, and he needs a little winter jacket-"

"We're in L.A...." Tom reminded but Bill ignored him; those jackets were so cute. 

"And I want one of those cool things that you put on them that say something? I want one that says Fatso! And we also need-"

"I don't think they have one with Fatso on it," Tom laughed quietly. 

"Really? They should make one," Bill nodded firmly, continuing to ramble while he made himself and Tom another grilled cheese sandwich. 

 

A good hour later, they were all packed up in Tom's car on their way to the pet store; Pumba was there too, of course. 

"We are not getting my little angel anything that says 'Fatso'!" the blond exclaimed outraged. 

"Why not? It would be really funny," Bill protested. 

"Forget it! When you get a dog you can call him Fatso," the older Bill grumbled. 

"Pumba is my dog, too. Everything that you own is also mine," Bill reasoned with a wicked a grin. 

"Absolutely not!" his future self shook his head. 

"Stop arguing Billys, we're almost there," Tom interrupted. 

"You did not just call us that," the older Bill gasped. 

"He totally did, I heard him," Bill nodded with a glare at their twin. 

This was not at all the day Bill had had in mind; he was actually still somewhat torn up about the whole thing from last night, and actually wanted to talk about it, but obviously things didn't go according to his plan; maybe he'd be able to talk to himself about it later. Or maybe to Tom... 

As they browsed through the dog section of the store, where both Bills were excited over dog fashion, Tom just strolled along with them, pushing the cart and keeping Pumba from snacking out of the dog food racks. 

Absently Bill found himself looking back at his twin one too many times, occasionally catching his eyes and exchanging a smile with him - which didn't seem to be awkward for Tom at all, while Bill on the other hand felt like an idiot, ogling at his own brother like a lovesick puppy. 

"I don't know... either this one or this one. What do you think?" the blond asked, holding up a rope with a tennis ball attached to it, and a squeaky raccoon toy. 

"I want the raccoon!" Bill gave the toy a squeeze, making it emit a loud squeaky sound. 

"I want the rope though," his older self said thoughtfully. 

"Why don't you just get both then?" Tom reasoned, and so they got both. Plus a lot of food, shampoo and other dog articles, most of which were not even part of the new collection, but whatever.

 

 

"We should still walk the dogs before heading home so we can try out Pumba's new harness," older Bill suggested once everything was stuffed into the trunk together with the dogs, and they began their journey home. 

They had ended up buying a harness that said 'Warrior' instead of 'Fatso'. Bill thought that Warrior didn't fit Pumba at all... He was a lazy, fat, adorable dog that was in no way related to anything Warrior-style, but whatever. They hadn't had one with Fatso anyway. 

They parked at their usual spot where they walked the dogs, and both Bills worked together to put Pumba into his new harness vest that fit him despite him being so short and fat. 

Once the dogs were ready to be walked, Bill took Pumba while his older version took Tom's dog who had such a complicated name that Bill resorted to calling him 'Tom's dog'. His name was something like Leonard Claudius Renoir Saint Francis III. Maybe they should just call him Leon. 

"Hey, is everything ok?" his future self asked quietly as they headed up the road with the dogs while Tom was still drinking something and locking the car. 

"Yeah, fine, why?" Bill asked a bit nervously. 

"I don't know, you've been acting weird since last night," his future self pointed out concerned. 

"No. Fine. Im just... ugh. You know," Bill shrugged.

"What?" the blond raised an eyebrow; "You're just what?"

"Confused. I don't know what to do, or even what I'm feeling right now... You guys are really confusing me," he accused tiredly. 

"'We guys' or mostly just 'Tom'?" his future self grinned wickedly; why couldn't he take his own problems a little more serious?!

"I don't know!" Bill grumbled moodily; he had woken up in such a great mood but by now he was just confused and exasperated. 

"Oh come on, don't think I missed those little looks you've been giving him," the blond teased lightly while Bill growled at him. 

"Shut up, Billy," he scoffed, only making himself laugh. 

"Aw, don't be so pissy. It's not that big a deal," his older self encouraged him with a bright smile and an arm around his shoulder. 

"Yes it is," Bill sighed heavily; "This is all so messed up and I'm confused and I don't know what to do... here or in the past... or the future, for that matter."

"Stop worrying so much! It'll be fine. Look at how the future can be, why are you so worried?" his older self reasoned, and though Bill knew he was right, he was still very conflicted. 

"Why don't you talk to Tom about it? I'm sure he knows best how he wants to be treated in the past. I'll take Pumba," the blond offered cheerfully, taking the dog from Bill and running ahead with a playful wink. 

Bill sighed again, this time just to show the world how frustrated he was while he waited for Tom to catch up with him. 

"Hey, where'd Bill go?" his twin questioned once they were almost side by side.

"He ran off with Pumba and what's-his-face," Bill shrugged, unsure whether he even wanted to talk to Tom about this. 

"Ok...?" Tom raised an eyebrow; "Everything alright between you guys?

"Oh yeah, fine. We were just talking..." Bill trailed off, kicking up dust with his sneakers. 

"About what? Last night?" Tom asked quietly; he wasn't as light and chipper as Bill's self had been about the topic.

"Yeah, about that... I'm just scared of what will happen once I go back home," Bill mumbled.

"I think that whatever your future will be, it'll be different than the one now since you know things that Bill didn't. Like you said - you're different now so you will make different choices. When you wake up in the hospital, the future as we know it will change according to whatever choices you make," his twin finished with a sad smile; obviously he liked this version of the future. 

"What exactly happened last time? I mean... the only time that has happened yet... or whatever you call it?" Bill asked confusion.

"Well... not much. You drifted in and out of the coma for a few days before finally being fully back, and about a week later you told me that you had heard all the things I told you, and after that things progressed rather quickly... Of course I didn't want to be with anyone else so from the moment you told me, we were together and have stayed it ever since," Tom narrated while they slowly followed the future Bill and the dogs up the dirt road; "I know things will be different this time, but they don't have to be entirely different - we can still be together just like we are now. Even in the past, you and I are still the same people..."

"But you were so different back then," Bill argued again, not even sure what he meant with that anymore.

"No I wasn't, Bill, you just think that I was. If it worked without you even knowing all this last time, don't you think it would work again? Now that you know what our future together looks like?" Tom insisted softly, giving him an urgent look. 

Of course this was a future that Bill really wanted, even if he was scared of it; why was he doubting it? Tom was everything he wanted... Everything he had ever wanted without knowing that it was so close this entire time. 

"So what do I do when I get back? Do I tell you about all this?" 

"Hm, I don't know... I'll probably think you're crazy at first, but... I think I would believe you, especially in time given you know everything that we will do and what will happen to us, so sooner or later I will realize you're telling the truth. But it's entirely up to you whether you even want me to know all this or not," Tom chuckled before adding with a wicked smirk; "Though if you do tell me, don't leave out last night - my past me is dying to hear about it."

Bill gave a laugh and blushed, knowing he would probably never mention that seriously awkward part to his twin in the past because it was waaay too embarrassing. 

"I'm sure you are," Bill poked his arm with another embarrassed laugh. 

"You bet," Tom grinned, suddenly pulling him close and tilting his head up for a surprise kiss; alright so maybe Tom could also be quite assertive if the occasion called for it. 

Bill gave a startled sound into the surprisingly possessive kiss before winding his arms around his twin to be as close as possible to him, pulling their bodies flush against each other while letting his tongue roam freely over Tom's delicious lip piercing before letting it travel into his mouth where he was immediately greeted by his brother. 

This time the kiss was not soft like the ones he had usually shared with his twin, but rough and dominating similarly to kissing himself; it caused Bill's blood pressure and temperature to rise dangerously quickly, together with his breathing that became more frantic together with his brother's. 

Hungrily, Tom's tongue invaded his mouth again while his hands began to grope under Bill's shirt, pushing it a bit up in the process; this might not be the best place for something like that. But of course Bill's mind was entirely elsewhere already - lost somewhere in the pleasures of last night. 

Their heated kisses continued for another few moments before Tom gently pushed him away to catch his breath; "Wait a minute, Bill," he murmured softly. 

"Ngh, what?" Bill growled moodily, not liking it at all when Tom just stopped with these things so randomly. 

"We actually wanted to talk about something," Tom chuckled and Bill rolled his eyes.

"Do we have to do that right now?" he whined childishly. 

"Yes, kinda because I don't want you to return to the past while you still doubt us," he twin smiled warmly, caressing his cheek. 

"Who's us? You and I, or you and Bill?" Bill suddenly huffed, surprising himself. 

Apparently Tom was also surprised at this; "Me and Bill...? Bill you are...Bill," he said stupidly. 

"I know that," he sighed.

"Are you jealous of yourself?" Tom was obviously trying to fight down a smile. 

"Ugh! I don't know! No... I don't know," Bill ranted exasperatedly and threw his hands up. 

"Seriously...? You're jealous that you will be happy with me in ten years?" his twin chuckled, causing Bill to punch him in the arm. 

"Shut up. I don't know... I just don't want you to be with anyone... other than me... Me right now, not me later...AH! I don't know, ok?" Bill groaned loudly. 

"So what do you want me to do, dump the future you for your younger version?" Tom laughed. 

"No, of course not... I don't want you to do anything - it's fine that you're with me... in the future. I just don't want you to be with anyone else," Bill pouted. 

Tom smiled softly, giving him a gentle kiss; "I don't want to be with anyone but you - in the past, the present and the future as well."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, so cute. Poor Bill is totally jealous of himself xD


	17. Chapter 17

"Well good, because if I ever find out that you're cheating on me with anyone other than myself, I'm going to kill you," Bill said drily, earning another laugh from his older twin.

"Why would I ever want someone else when I can be with you, the person I've wanted my entire life?" Tom asked intently, pulling him closer again; "I know it might still take a while until you get used to this, but please don't doubt my feelings for you," he murmured against his lips before capturing them in another passionate kiss.

Bill stood on his toes to match up to his brother's height and for a few blissful moments he got lost in his twin's embrace where he forgot all about the jealousy he felt towards himself. Sadly it didn't last very long.

"Seriously? You guys are making out in public?" the blond Bill suddenly showed up with Leon and Pumba; "You do know that there are a couple of people just up the road, right?" he laughed.

Bill sighed as he pulled away from his brother, trying to fix his messed up hair.

"Yeah, we were just talking about you and how jealous you are of yourself," Tom chuckled, giving Bill another quick kiss before stepping away to take Leon from his twin.

"Tom!" Bill complained humiliated while his older self laughed.

"Aw, yeah I know... I'm sorry Bill," the blond smiled while wrapping an arm around his shoulder to pull him back down the road towards the car; "I'm not trying to steal your boyfriend, don't worry. He's all... well... ours, in theory, but if you want, you can have him while you're here," he offered with a bright smile.

Bill gave himself a very disturbed look; "Great, you're lending him to me?" he asked drily.

"Yup! But only to you, you're not allowed to give him away to anyone else," the blond grinned.

"That is so wrong I don't even know what to say to it," Bill said slowly, giving himself another freaked out look.

"Oh come on, I'm you, I lend you everything. Why should Tom be an exception to that?" he reasoned cheerfully.

"That's still so wrong."

"No it's not!" the blond said happily, catching up with their twin; "Tom, wait for us!"

Tom chuckled while they caught up with him, walking on either side of him; "I heard that, you know," he gave the blond Bill a wicked grin.

"Don't tell me you mind me lending you to my younger self?" older Bill grinned before adding, "I knew that sooner or later you'd set your eyes on someone younger!" he sighed tragically.

"Uh-huh," Tom chuckled; "And what about you? I always knew you were into guys way too old for you. I mean seriously Bill, 10 years? That's really gross," he shook his head in disapproval while the blond giggled and Bill groaned.

"You guys are so wrong! Just shut up!" he grumbled as they arrived at the car.

"Aw, don't be grumpy. We're trying to cheer you up," his older self pointed out as he opened the car that Tom had just unlocked, to let the dogs back in.

"I know that you're not trying to cheer me up! You're trying to kill me! I can't believe I'm related to you two," Bill sighed while he helped himself load Pumba into the back.

"Technically seen you're not related to me... Or at least I don't think that related is the right word," his older self mused slowly.

"No, it's worse: I am you," Bill mumbled in defeat.

"Yeah, though I don't remember being like you at that age at all... Seriously, when I was your a-"

"Don't even start like that!" Bill interrupted himself; "You sound like my grandmother. When you were my age, you weren't taken ten years into the future. Cuz if you were, you would have reacted the exact same way as me," he concluded firmly.

His future self was about to object, but Tom interrupted them; "Bills, can you possibly carry on with this discussion in the car? I want to leave," he pointed to the car that he was climbing into.

"This isn't over," the future Bill murmured in his 'deep and dangerous' voice that sounded ridiculous to Bill; did he really sound like that?

"Whatever. Aaanyway," Bill brushed himself off, "I'm hungry. What are we eating?"

"Me too," Tom agreed immediately, and the older Bill nodded enthusiastically, apparently having forgotten all about his earlier threat.

"I was thinking we could go back to that one place where I ate that weird corn cream soup with tortilla? That was soo good," Bill remembered, really wanting to eat that soup again.

"Oh my god!" the older Bill shrieked, startling poor Pumba who was peeking out from behind their seat; "You want to eat vegetarian!" he chanted happily; "I knew you would come around sooner or later!"

Bill rolled his eyes while Tom laughed and his future self clapped enthusiastically, bouncing up and down in his seat.

"Alright. I admit it, there are a few vegetarian things that are good. But most are not!" Bill said firmly.

"Like what?" his older self demanded, placing his hands on his hips; "Name one thing we ate that wasn't good."

"There were a lot of them," Bill shook his head.

"Name one!" the blond exclaimed.

"Ok, so maybe the things we've eaten were pretty good, but-"

"AHA!" his older self interrupted triumphantly.

"BUT! Not all vegetarian things are good! Just the ones we tried so far!" Bill yelled over his own interruption.

"Not all none-vegetarian things are good either though," Tom pointed out from the front of the car, giving him an amused smile through the rearview mirror.

"Mmhmm," his older self purred into his ear while Bill tried to come up with a smart reply.

Bill immediately pulled away a bit and gave himself a disturbed look, but the blond just smirked knowingly.

A good half hour later, Bill was ordering the same corn cream soup he had eaten last time, while his twins discussed a photoshoot they had coming up. Apparently Tom didn't want to go, and wanted Bill to do it all on his own. Apparently the future Tom wasn't any fonder of photoshoots than the past Tom was.

Bill was really looking forward to the life they had here. Of course it was somewhat similar to what he knew already, but Berlin just couldn't be compared to L.A.  
Nothing could be compared to L.A.   
It was absolutely everything Bill had ever dreamed of; the photoshoots, the city, the money, the fame, and above all, the music. Even though he'd been here a while already, every time his twins talked about their Tokio Hotel life, it made him want to return to the past so he could finally arrive in the future the way all other people did.   
His twins had warned him that it wasn't going to be an easy road, and there would be many difficult moments in their life ahead, but knowing things would one day turn out to be like this, made the terrifying future less scary. Especially because Tom was in his life. Unless of course things would turn out completely different.

"You know, even though you're really weird and I'm totally freaked out to be here, I'm still really glad it happened this way," Bill whispered to himself that evening once they had crawled into bed and switched off the light.

His future self laughed in the darkness; "I'm not any weirder than you are," he pointed out.

"Yeah let's not go there, I'm trying to have a serious conversation here," Bill sighed dramatically, though he had to grin.

"Ok, serious conversate away," his older self nodded next to his head.

"I don't think that's an actual word..." Bill mumbled, momentarily forgetting what he had wanted to talk about.

"Really? You're going to lecture me on grammar right now? I thought you wanted to conversate seriously," the blond sighed.

"It's called converse!" Bill said loudly.

"Ssshhhh! You're going to wake Tom up," his self laughed; "I think I know what the difference between you and me is."

"What? That I'm smarter than you? I swear you drink and smoke too much, it's affecting your brain. Or maybe all the loud music killed your brain cells," Bill grumbled.

"Music does not kill brain cells, though it has given me this awful tinnitus that I get occasionally... Do you ever get that?" the future Bill mused slowly; "I can't remember when that started..."

"Oh that, yeah, I get that sometimes... Great, so we still have that? Ugh, I hate it," Bill complained miserably before remembering what he had been talking about; "Stop changing the subject!"

"Ok, ok," his older self chuckled quietly; "What is it that you wanted to talk about?"

"I can't remember..." Bill sighed sadly.

"I bet it was about Tom though, right?" the blond giggled.

Bill poked himself in the stomach; "Shut up. And yes it was..."

The other Bill just laughed even more; "Alright, what did you want to say about him?"

"I don't know... something about what we were talking about earlier," Bill tried to put his thoughts back in order.

"When we were walking the dogs? About you being so much more prude than me?" the older Bill asked thoughtfully.

"What?! Who the hell said that?" Bill asked outraged.

"No one said it, I just thought it," he chuckled, shrugging; "I remember how I was back then... I always took everything so serious... Well maybe not everything, but now I can just laugh about it."

"...Right. That's great. I'm very happy for you, but it's also not your life that's a total mess right now! If you were in my place-"

"If I were in your place, I wouldn't be sleeping here in my own bed, but over there, in Tom's. Or possibly not sleeping at all yet..." he added with another giggle.

"Ugh, Bill! Can't you for once take me serious? I have a real problem here," Bill complained tiredly.

"What problem?" his older self asked lazily.

"What if my future isn't going to be what it is now? What if, due to me coming here, the entire course of history will change and things become completely different than they are now?" Bill asked in total paranoia; it was something that he'd been thinking about a lot lately.

"Oh.... Well... I don't know," the blond mumbled, suddenly completely serious; "I suppose the future isn't really set, and it will turn into whatever you make of it. Which is why I really don't want you- or us, to screw this up... I really want this future here," the future Bill said thoughtfully.

"What if I can't make it like that? What if I screw up?" Bill asked horrified; "What if this really amazing future... like you said, isn't set? What if I do something wrong and then something bad happens and... I don't know... Tom and me don't end up together or something?"

"Ok, ok, let's just calm down for a moment. There is no reason why Tom and you shouldn't be together. Tom loves you, he wants to be with you, so why shouldn't things happen like this?" his future self reasoned.

"I don't know... I'm just scared that something will go wrong," Bill sighed.

"Now imagine how scared I was of that all the time! I didn't even have a good future that was within the range of possible to look forward to. All I could do was go along and hope for the best. Same thing everyone does... Except for you – you know how amazing it could be. You just need to give it a chance," his older self encouraged him firmly, pulling him into a tight embrace.

Bill sighed, exhausted; the more he thought about this whole thing, the more paranoid and confused he got. No wonder time travel wasn't possible – it was crap. Putting aside the whole Tom thing, because that was really great, but everything else was crap. Knowing things was just rubbish. It made him scared to make mistakes, though he didn't know which ones, and it freaked him out beyond reason.   
The closer he got to the end of the five weeks, the more paranoid he got; what would happen once he got back home? How would he face his twin, now fully knowing what Tom felt for him? How could he approach such a subject?

"How did you do it?" Bill whispered at his older self; "How did you just... you know... talk about it?"

"About what, exactly?" his older self asked in confusion.

"You know... the thing between you guys. How does one approach something like that? I asked Tom, but he didn't really tell me much, and I still don't know what to do," Bill lamented.

"Oh that... I don't know. It was a few days after I got out of the hospital... I asked him what he'd been doing all the time while I was out, and he just laughed it off and said he'd been out screwing a bunch of groupies. Of course I knew that wasn't true because I had heard him sitting at my bed 24/7, and so I told him that I knew he was lying because I had heard everything he had said... Of course he was totally horrified, but then I told him that it was ok and that I felt that way about him, too. That was it..." the blond Bill shrugged softly, and Bill could hear the smile in his words.

"What about me? What do I do? I haven't heard anything being said to me because... well... I'm here and stuff..." Bill said dully.

"Yeah, I don't know. You might not want to tell him this right away... or maybe do, I don't know... You could just tell him that you know he wasn't out screwing around, if the conversation comes up, and if not... think of something else to bring it up. Come on Bill, we're smart! You'll think of something," he encouraged, giving him another tight squeeze.

"Yeah... I guess so," Bill sighed heavily, snuggling against himself.

"It'll be fine, don't worry about it," his older self assured him, kissing the top of his head.


	18. Chapter 18

"Ok, I'm ready! How do I look?" the future Bill pranced into the living room, followed by Pumba.

"You look fine, now get out. You're about to be late," Bill sighed loudly, not even looking up from the laptop he was sharing with Tom. It was shortly after lunch and Bill was supposed to go to that photoshoot that Tom had weaseled his way out of, but he was taking an endless time getting ready, like always. Of course Bill totally understood that, but it was different when it was... his older self rather than his current self.

"I look fine?! Ok, I need to change again. Just a second," the blond shook his head, disappearing back into his bedroom.

"Nono, wait! Bill! Come back!" Tom yelled after his twin but he was already gone; "Ugh! Bill!" he accused Bill and gave him a dark look.

"What?" Bill asked innocently.

"Don't tell yourself you look 'fine'. Seriously, you should know yourself better than that," he berated him, shaking his head; "Now he's going to take another hour before he's ready to go," Tom sighed in defeat.

"Oh yeah, sorry... I forgot I was talking to myself," Bill chuckled while his older twin groaned and got up to look for their third twin.

"Bill! You're going to be late – the car's already downstairs waiting," Tom called somewhere inside Bill's bedroom.

"Just a second," the future Bill replied a few moments later.

"You're going to get changed and make-uped at the studio anyway, so just go. Besides, you look great," Tom tried to usher him along.

"You always say I look great! Even when I just woke up and look like crap, so your opinion doesn't count here," the blond argued back.

"Yes, because you do always look great, even when you just got up and look like crap," Tom chuckled.

"So in other words: I look just like when I get up in the morning?! Ugh, Tom! Get out, I need to get dressed in peace!" the older Bill was obviously beginning to get stressed.

"That's not what I meant. I just meant-" Tom tried to argue, but apparently his twin kicked him out because a door could be heard slamming, and a second later Tom reappeared in the living room.

"Really? You've known me my entire life and didn't see that one coming?" Bill sniggered.

"Shush," Tom chuckled and rolled his eyes while he sat back down; "You're a real plague sometimes, you know that?"

"Shush," Bill laughed, slapping his older twin with one of the small pillows that lay on the couch.

Tom gasped; "You'll pay for that!" he threatened with a wicked grin, immediately jumping to his feet.

"AH! No! Help, Bill!" Bill laughed, jumping up as well before his twin managed to get him, and ran towards his older's bedroom.

"Help! Bill! I plead sanctuary!" he yelled, trying to open the door that the future Bill had locked in order to keep Tom out.

"You can run but you can't hide," Tom growled darkly, slowly stalking down the hall.

"Bill! Let me in!" Bill yelled in a mixture of giggles and laughter, knocking on the door.

"There's no escape from me now," Tom murmured huskily as he caught up with him, placing his hands flat against the door and trapping Bill inside them.

Warily, Bill turned around to face him and giggles quietly, suddenly overcome with a surprising excitement at the development of the situation; back in his own time, Tom would have tackled him to the ground and tickled him or something, but right now he seemed to have entirely different plans. Ones that Bill found a lot more enticing.

Lucky, before he could get any more nervous or overthink the situation, Tom suddenly wrapped his arms around him and lifted him up a bit, pressing both of them against the door. Immediately and without thinking, Bill wrapped his arms and legs around his smirking brother just before this one brought their lips together in a heated kiss, reminding Bill again just how different this Tom was compared to the one he knew back in the past.

Just as Bill moaned almost inaudibly in the back of his throat, the door suddenly opened and they stumbled backwards, Bill's moan turning into a loud shriek as they fell into Bill's room.

"What the-!" the blond Bill exclaimed loudly as Bill and Tom smashed into him, sending all three of them to the ground in a tumbling mess.

"Ow! Guys, what the hell are you doing?!" the future Bill half laughed, half yelled while Tom just laughed, trying to push himself off both his twins, and Bill lay helpless, trapped between his older twins, unable to move much.

"I was trying to hide from evil Tom – didn't you hear me knocking?" Bill twisted his head to take a look at himself still lying somewhere half underneath him.

"Yes, I heard. I'm trying to get ready in here, people!" his future self sent them an angry glare, even though Bill could easily see he was fighting back a smile.

By now, Tom had finally managed to get back up and helped Bill to his feet; Bill's older self was up on his own in a second and ushered them back outside; "Out, out, out! I need to get ready so go smooch somewhere else!" he scolded them with a smirk.

"You look great already - what are you still doing?" Bill asked himself in disbelief, mostly trying to get himself to hurry to that photoshoot.

"Hush, we both know you're lying," the blond shushed him as he pushed them out the door.

"I am not!" Bill protested; "Given how you look now, this is as good as it'll get anyway," he stuck his tongue out at his outraged older self.

"Tom! Did you hear that?!" the older Bill shrieked; "You can't let him talk to me like that! Spank him!" the blond demanded with a nasty glare before smirking; "You know I like it when you spank me," he added with a wink at Bill before shutting the door and locking it again.

Tom chuckled lowly and gave him a naughty smirk while Bill got so embarrassed he barely dared to look at his twin; he'd been kidding, right?

"I-I don't actually like that, right?" Bill mumbled horrified, giving Tom a pleading look, willing him to say 'no'.

"I don't know – do you?" Tom grinned, heading back towards the living room.

"No!" Bill exclaimed immediately; he didn't like that, right? Or did he...? He'd never really thought about it because... because that was so weird and gross and he generally tried not to think of such things. Oh god, could it be that he was into something weird like that? Bill began to get completely paranoid; who had he become in this twisted future?!

"...what about Bill? Is he into that?" Bill mumbled awkwardly as he followed his amused twin back to the living room; he'd already learned that he and the Bill from the future were quite different sometimes, so who knew...

"I guess you'll have to wait and find out," Tom flashed him a wicked grin that sent shivers down his spine; that couldn't possibly be good.

Bill made an awkward sound in the back of his throat because he was too embarrassed to say anything.

"Relax, Bill was just messing with you," Tom gave him another smirk as he dropped down in his earlier spot on the couch, and even though Bill really wanted to believe him, there was something unsettling in Tom's amused eyes.

"Are you sure?" Bill mumbled stupidly, not being able to keep his face from burning up in humiliation.

"'Course," Tom smiled calmly, not removing his eyes from the laptop he had reopened.

Bill studied his brother's features carefully, trying to determine whether Tom was serious or not, but at that moment he found it impossible to read his twin.

"What?" Tom eventually laughed, lifting his gaze to give him an expectant look.

"Nothing," Bill mumbled, looking away; there were certain things about the future he didn't want to know: like when and how he would die or which sexual fetishes he had. Some things were better left unsaid.

"Alright! How do I look?" the blond Bill danced back into the room just a few awkward seconds later, looking almost exactly the way he had earlier.

"Perfect!" Bill and Tom said in unison.

"That's all I wanted to hear! Was that really so hard?" the older Bill smiled brightly, grabbing his jacket on his way to the door; "Alright boys, behave yourselves and don't do anything I wouldn't do," he grinned as he reached the door; "In other words – feel free to do anything!" With that, he left and closed the door behind him without awaiting an answer.

"You're right," Bill nodded thoughtfully; "I can be a total plague sometimes."

"Yeah," his twin chuckled quietly; "But just sometimes," he added with one of those soft smiles.

There it was again: that odd look Bill still hadn't figured out yet. The way his twin looked at him - there was something about it that he had never seen in the younger Tom before. Or had he but he'd just never paid any attention to it...?

"What?" Tom chuckled again, lifting his head a bit to give him another expectant look.

"What?" Bill asked stupidly.

"I don't know, you're the one looking at me so expectantly," his twin smiled.

"Oh. No. I don't know," Bill mumbled, looking away; was he waiting for something? Like for them to carry on at the point they had left off earlier at Bill's door? But Bill wasn't here right now so... were they even allowed to... do things, or would that be considered cheating on Bill...? 'Ugh, this whole sharing-a-boyfriend-thing sucks,' Bill thought drily, only to remind himself that Tom wasn't actually his boyfriend... he was Bill's boyfriend. 'Ugh, damn Bill.'

"I wonder when Bill will be back?" he asked absently, trying to stop thinking about that really short kiss a few minutes ago.

Tom shrugged; "Photoshoots can take quite a while. He probably won't be back before dinner."

"Oh... should we order something?" Bill suggested, not knowing what to talk about; they had been talking about how different their music had become over the years earlier, but now he just felt awkward.

"What, right now? We just had lunch," Tom chuckled, raising an eyebrow.

"No, I meant later," Bill laughed a bit.

"Sure, I guess we could do that," his older twin nodded.

"Something none vegetarian?" Bill gave him a hopeful look, but Tom just laughed, shaking his head.

"No, nothing none vegetarian!"

"Oh come on, why not?" Bill protested; "Bill's not here anyway!"

"Because you actually want to be vegetarian – you just don't know it yet," Tom shook his head.

"But if I don't know that I want something, then I don't want it," Bill tried to reason.

"Yes you do, you're just not aware of it. But if you do what you really want, even without knowing that that's what you want, it will make you happier than if you do what you think you want if it's not what you actually want," Tom explained.

"...What?" Bill asked slowly; "Can you repeat that because I don't think I got it," he said slowly.

Tom laughed; "Let's just order vegetarian, ok?"

"But you love meat! Back in my time we go to McDonalds all the time!" Bill exclaimed loudly.

"Yes, I remember. You always order a Big Mac, 6 chicken nuggets with sweet-sour sauce, and a vanilla milkshake," Tom said thoughtfully.

"...You remember that?" Bill asked in disbelief.

"Yes," his twin smiled solemnly.

"...Oh... well yeah, it tastes awesome," Bill nodded; "Why don't we go to McDonalds?" he suggested excitedly.

"Ew, no, we're not doing that," Tom shook his head determinedly.

"Why not? You used to love it!"

"Yes, until I found out what chicken nuggets are made of..." Tom pulled a disgusted face.

"Chickens...?" Bill asked dully.

"Yeah... whole baby chickens or some crap like that," Tom shook his head in disgust; "There's no way I'm having that."

"I don't believe that," Bill shook his head; "Where did you get that seriously dubious information from?"

"Alright, fine! Maybe it's not whole baby chickens, but that's not the point," Tom threw his hands up in exasperation.

"Then what is the point?" Bill crossed his arms.

"The point is that all those chickens spend their entire lives in cages that are smaller than a sheet of paper, in dark, smelly rooms, just waiting for the day when someone kills them to turn them into a nugget... I just don't want to be part of that, even if I really like nuggets," Tom explained gently.

"Oh," Bill nodded slowly, for the first time actually seeing his brother's point of view on the matter; "What if they were made out of really happy chickens who lived long happy lives outside? Like... you know, those organic, free running chickens or something?"

"Of course those kinds of chickens exist, and I'm sure that eating one of them wouldn't be too bad if it really did have a long happy life, but I can assure you that McDonalds doesn't use those," Tom sighed, obviously wanting to move on to some other place.

"So what about not McDonalds meat? Some other kind? Like... you know... ethnic meat?" Bill tried hopefully.

His twin turned his head sideways, giving him an odd look; "We've had this conversation before... except it was the other way around. Back in the day, you were trying to convince me to become vegetarian," he smiled fondly at the memory.

"How'd it go?" Bill raised a surprised eyebrow; he had convinced Tom to become vegetarian...? 'Oh god, why did I do such a thing?!'

"Well... I'm vegetarian now, so... good, I guess," he grinned.

Obviously that made sense; "Alright, so... if I ever find some really happy chicken, can I eat it then?"

Tom laughed out loud; "If you ever find a happy chicken... Why would you want to eat a happy chicken? Why don't you just let it be happy?"

"Ugh! Fine! I give up!" Bill groaned, dropping back into his pillows; "I'm still totally eating a chicken when I find a happy one," he mumbled; "And when I get back home. I swear the first thing I'm doing when I get back to the past is eat meat!"

"Alright, you do that," Tom chuckled, shaking his head with a smile and setting the laptop on the small coffee table before suddenly reaching over and pulling Bill on his lap.

"What...?" Bill asked, caught off guard, but not minding the new position at all as he settled comfortably where the laptop had been situated earlier; "Oh, ok," he mumbled stupidly while Tom chuckled against his lips.


	19. Chapter 19

Finally Bill managed to relax against his older twin without having to fear any weird interruption from any side; now that his older self was gone and hopefully wouldn't return for a few hours, he finally had the chance to get to know this intriguing Tom a little better. Bill had said that it was alright if they... did whatever they wanted, so that meant they had Bill's consent, right?   
Bill tried to think of what it is that he would want; of course he wouldn't want it if his twins were randomly making out without him, but... What if he would be the older one? The older one who really wanted his younger self to get together with his twin? After all, the older Bill really wanted him and Tom to get together, right?

"Yes," Tom chuckled quietly, breaking the kiss.

"What?" Bill asked in confusion.

"Bill is fine with this," he smiled warmly; apparently their twin connection even stretched over a ten year time difference and Tom still knew what he was thinking half the time.

"Oh...yeah. I was just..." Bill mumbled stupidly; "Are you sure?"

"Yes, of course I'm sure. We always talk about everything, have you forgotten that?" Tom asked amused.

Bill laughed a bit; "We still do that?"

"Of course," Tom just smiled again, giving him another gentle kiss.

"Oh... alright. Great," Bill nodded absently, pulling a little closer again to get back to the kissing; Tom was such an amazing kisser it made his head spin. Not that he had all that much to compare it to other than himself, which was also pretty good, but with Tom it was just... breathtaking.

Slowly, Bill wrapped his arms around his twin's neck, raking his fingers through his brother's soft hair that felt so different from the dreads he used to have when he was 15. Back in the past, Bill had often helped Tom wax them, and remembered well how they had felt; he'd actually always really liked them and suddenly had the odd desire to touch them. He'd never thought about it before because... well back in the day, Tom had been nothing more than his brother, but now that he saw him in a slightly different light, he also suddenly became curious to... do other things and get to know him in a totally different way.

Everything about the older Tom was different, not just his hair and toned physique or his voice, smile, and insanely different personality; he was like a different person, and yet so utterly familiar to Bill who finally had time to analyze it all.

As many differences as there were between the younger and older Tom, there were just as many similarities: that cocky smile and wicked laugh, the playful glint in his eyes, and the scent that Bill knew better than any other in the world even if he had never been as aware of it as he was in that moment.

Shakily, he breathed between their kisses, snuggling closer to his twin without being able to get enough of him; how had he never noticed this before? How had he not fallen in love with Tom in the past when they were so perfect for each other?  
At first he had believed himself to be crazy for wanting this, but the longer he stayed here the more he realized how impossibly well they were together. How perfect their hearts beat against each other, and how right it felt to be here, in his brother's arms.

Curious to discover more of his changed twin, Bill slowly dug his fingers through Tom's hair, gently dragging his nails across his brother's scalp to cradle his head with both his hands; it was a sensation he liked very much because it allowed him to hold his twin in the perfect kissing position, without Tom really being able to move much.  
With a sigh, he broke their deep, slow kiss, his lips brushing over Tom's beard – a sensation that Bill still wasn't used to at all. It hadn't actually been long since he himself had started shaving, but obviously that was a bit different still, being 16 and all, so this whole facial-hair-thing was rather new to him. Of course he'd noticed it before when they kissed, but now he had more time to contemplate it, and slowly trailed his hand back around to stroke across his twin's cheek, wondering how different that would feel ten years ago.

Tom raised an amused eyebrow; "What?" he asked with a smile.

"I don't know... You're so..." Bill was searching for the right word because 'mature' sounded so stupid even though that's actually what he meant.

"I swear to god if you say old, I'm going to take you up on that earlier offer and spank you," Tom grinned wickedly.

Bill gave a squeaky laugh, burying his head in his brother's hair that hung down his shoulders; "That wasn't an offer!" he squawked embarrassed; "And that wasn't what I wanted to say at all!"

Tom chuckled; "What did you want to say then?"

"I don't know, I forgot because you're such a pervert," Bill accused with a light giggle.

"Hm, I don't know. Who's the bigger pervert, the one who enjoys spanking people, or the one who enjoys being spanked?" Tom murmured into his ear; Bill could practically hear his brother's grin in his words.

"I don't enjoy that! You said I had been kidding!" Bill lifted his head, meekly slapping his brother's chest.

"Maybe I was the one kidding," his twin gave him a naughty smirk that made Bill's stomach feel funny.

Bill gave him a horrified look, blushing even more than before; he didn't know what to say because he was mortified by the possibility that maybe he really had grown up to become so twisted. Would he really enjoy it if Tom-?

Tom burst out laughing; "You're so easy to tease."

"Ugh! Tom!" Bill glared at his older brother, giving him a soft punch in the stomach.

Of course that didn't keep him from laughing some more at Bill who was still blushing furiously, before Tom finally composed himself and drew him closer for an amused kiss; Bill just huffed and sniffed pointedly, turning his head away to pout. Of course Tom had always teased him, but not like this - this kind of teasing made Bill all jittery and excited, and he wasn't sure how to handle it.

"Come here," Tom chuckled lowly, suddenly pushing off the couch and sending them both to the ground where he straddled him into the carpet and began to kiss him fiercely.

Bill didn't manage more than a surprised squeak, and soon enough gave into his twin's demanding kiss that was impossible to refuse.

Their kiss intensified quickly, demanding ragged breaths from both of them while Tom slowly lowered himself a bit, lying half on top of him. Even though Tom's future body was quite a bit heavier than Bill, the weight was comfortable; there was something reassuring about his twin's heavy body pressing him into the fuzzy carpet.   
Wanting his brother's full weight on him, Bill slowly circled his arms around his twin's back, pulling him closer and taking the opportunity to slip his hands underneath his shirt to grope his hot skin. Every time he touched some of Tom's skin, he expected it to be rougher, more suitable to his personality or something, but it was soft and silky, and not at all the way Bill's own skin felt for him.   
Eagerly, he ran his fingers across his brother's back, tracing the outlines of his ribs and muscles that were easy to find underneath his smooth skin.

With a gentle smile, Tom sat back on his heels and pulled his shirt over his head, discarding it next to them on the floor. Bill sat up as well, staring shamelessly at his twin's body that he still wasn't used to, unsure whether he should touch him or not; he wanted to, of course, but somehow he felt awkward just sitting there on the floor, groping his brother.

This seemed to be another one of those moments when Tom knew exactly how he felt, because he just remained there, leaning back on his heels with an encouraging smile, apparently not caring that Bill was gaping at him.   
Tentatively, Bill edged a bit closer, and with a careful glace at his brother to make sure this was all good, he slid his fingers across Tom's chest to explore the unfamiliar territory. Even though he'd actually touched Tom a bit since he was here, right now it was different because he could really take his time with it; there was no Bill to interrupt them.

Just like the rest of him, Tom's skin on his chest was soft and smooth, covering the toned tissue underneath that was utterly intriguing to Bill. The last time he had seen the younger Tom sparsely dressed had been in their dressing room before the concert on the day Bill had come here, and now he wished he had paid closer attention to it; had Tom paid attention to him all those years...? Had Tom been secretly admiring him without him ever having noticed it? Had he sometimes gaped at him the way Bill was doing now?

While Bill traced his hands across Tom's firm body, his mind wandered to the twin who was still in the past, waiting by his bed for him to wake up. What had he been feeling all those years? All those thousands of times they slept together, undressed in front of each other or showered together; what had Tom been thinking and feeling in all those moments?  
There was a slight twinge in his stomach that felt oddly like betrayal.

"Tom?" Bill mumbled absently, lifting his gaze from his brother's chest to his dark eyes.

"Hm?" Tom gave him another encouraging smile.

"You've been in love with me for a while, right?"

Tom chuckled; "A while... yeah. 16 years," he smiled fondly.

"Right... That's like... my entire life," Bill mumbled stupidly.

"Yes, it is," Tom nodded, still smiling.

"Why didn't you tell me? Did you really believe I would turn you down?" he asked carefully.

Tom nodded slowly; "Yes... I was very certain. I thought you would react... the way you did when you found out about me and Bill," he regretted.

"I'm so sorry about that," Bill apologized again; "I didn't know, I just..."

"Yeah, I know," Tom smiled warmly.

"I still wish you would have told me. I mean... all those years..." Bill sighed, pulling his legs up to his chest while his brother sat down cross legged in front of him.

"I also wish that, but I suppose we weren't ready for it. These things take time – you can't just force them. And besides... if you do decide to... give me a chance, we have a long time ahead of us anyway," Tom gave him a hopeful smile.

Bill laughed a bit; the truth was that he couldn't wait to get back to the past so he could be with the younger Tom. He was dying to know how Tom would go from his old self to this new one.

"Yeah, maybe I'll give you a chance," he grinned playfully before remembering what he had actually wanted to talk about. "But all those years... I mean all the things we did together... All the people you were with ... What were you thinking all that time? How could live like that? I think I would have died..."

Tom sighed, nodded; "At first I tried to ignore it. It was around that time when I became sort of..."

"Nasty?" Bill asked dully, and his twin laughed.

"Yes. I really didn't want to be close to you because it scared me how you made me feel. After a while I got used to it and then I just ignored it and pretended it wasn't there... Of course that didn't work for long, so eventually I just... dealt with it. I tried to distract myself from it as much as possible, though being around you was always total torture for me. On one hand I really wanted to be close to you, and on the other it was awful," he narrated slowly while Bill just nodded, not being able to imagine how terrible it had to be.

"And while you were with someone else?" Bill asked carefully; knowing that Tom had had countless partners was still disturbing to him, and made him insecure.

"There was nothing ever there, Bill. None of them ever meant anything to me... I just wanted to be with them because you were always so close and yet so unreachable that it drove me insane. I was frustrated and lonely, and for a few hours they let me forget that I couldn't be with you because you were the only one ever on my mind. My fantasies were the closest to you I would ever be, and they were an outlet for them. When I was with someone, for a little while I managed to forget that what I wanted more than anything in the world would never be reality," Tom finished with a sad sigh.

Those were the words Bill had wanted to hear, and they made him feel instantly better; Tom always managed to make him feel better. Slowly he crawled towards him again, giving him a hesitant smile that would hopefully let his brother know that he understood.

Tom returned the smile, leaning their foreheads together; "You are the only person I will ever love, no matter what the future holds in store for us."


	20. Chapter 20

As much as Bill wished to say the same words to his brother, he wasn't sure he was ready so he ended up just nodding in silence. Tom didn't appear to expect a love declaration because he lay down on the carpet, facing Bill who lay down beside him, and so they just lay there on their sides in comfortable silence for a while, gazing into each other's eyes; his eyes were the only thing about Tom that hadn't changed at all in the past ten years. They were still identical, and the longer Bill looked into them, the more he lost himself. Of course this was something they had never done back in the past because it was intimate and romantic, and completely unsuitable for twins, but by now Bill didn't view it like that anymore, and wanted to lie there forever by his brother's side, without anyone coming between them ever again.

"It's not going to be like this when I go back, right?" Bill whispered the short distance between their faces.

"It could be if you wanted it to. It's what I've wanted for a long time," Tom smiled warmly, gently stroking his cheek with right hand, his left arm folded under his head as a pillow.   
Bill sighed against the touch, scooting another inch closer to his brother so their bodies were almost touching, and copying his brother's position, with his right arm folded under his head and his left one free to reach out to his twin who was still shirtless, and looking really tempting to Bill.

Slowly he let his fingers travel along Tom's sides, gliding from his shoulder to the curve of his stomach and coming to rest on his hip bone which was barely above his waistband.   
All of this was so different than what he remembered Tom from the past to look like; not that he'd ever looked so close before, but from what he'd seen, this was very different and Bill again wondered if it would feel different too; was Tom's skin in the past just as soft as it was now? It probably was since it made no sense otherwise, but for Bill it just felt surreal.

"Amazing how much we changed in just ten years, huh?" Tom smiled amused, always knowing what was on Bill's mind.

"Mhm," Bill agreed with a gentle nod, dragging his fingers across his brother's stomach, back up to his chest before wrapping around his neck to draw him into a slow kiss.

Unlike most of their previous kisses, this one wasn't frantic and messy, but gentle and exploring, giving Bill all the time in the world he wanted to taste every little part of his brother's sweet mouth. It's not like the future Bill would show up to interrupt them, hopefully.   
Patiently, Bill ran his tongue over his brother's teeth, testing their surface and structure before eventually returning to Tom's waiting tongue.

Just as slow as their kiss, Tom slid his hands up his shirt and began pushing it upwards until the only thing in its way was their lips that were still attached to each other. Tom drew back a bit to remove the clothing article, and Bill took the chance to gather a deep breath, having expected their kissing to continue right away, but apparently now it was Tom's turn to look.

"I barely remember you tattooless," he smiled affectionately, running his fingers across Bill's side that would be covered in tattoos in the future.

"I already have one," Bill pointed out proudly.

"Ah yes, of course. Logo," Tom laughed with a nod.

"What do I get next?" Bill wanted to get the order done correctly.

"The star," Tom looked down, letting his fingers dance across Bill's stomach until they reached the spot where his older self had the star tattoo; "That is always going to be my favorite one," Tom murmured huskily, giving him a wolfish smile.

Bill fought down the horrible blush that had the audacity to show at his brother's words and smile; what was it about Tom acting like that that made Bill so self conscious and awkward?

"You didn't tell me that you were getting it. You just suddenly showed up one afternoon and had it. And ever since that day, every time I caught a glimpse of it, I had to stare at it and wanted to touch it – it drove me crazy," he laughed.

"I didn't tell you?" Bill raised a surprised eyebrow; he usually always told Tom everything, especially stuff like getting tattoos.

"No. You actually went to the tattoo studio to ask how much it would cost, but the tattoo guy said he had an opening right then and if you wanted it, so you went right ahead and got it done without telling anyone. It was only a few months later that you told mom and Gordon about it," Tom remembered with another chuckle.

"Wow, I didn't even know I'm that spontaneous," Bill grinned, usually needing a lot of time to adjust to thoughts and ideas.

"You will be. Well... of course not as spontaneous as me, but enough," Tom said wickedly.

"Oh really?" Bill raised a challenging eyebrow; "I'm going to be all spontaneous and adventurous?"

"Oh yeah," Tom's grin widened until it turned into a naughty smirk; "You'll be all for spontaneous sex right before concerts and all."

"What?!" Bill shrieked in disbelief; "I don't believe that! I would never have sex right before a show!"

"You totally will. Really often, actually," Tom grinned.

"Ugh!" Bill groaned, covering his blushing face with his hands; "There are certain things about the future I don't want to know."

"Yeah, but this is one of the things you totally want to know," his twin smirked.

Bill sighed, poking his brother in the stomach; "Whatever. Why?! Am I not nervous before concerts anymore?" he asked weakly.

"Yes you are. We all are, and we all have weird little things we do to help us calm down. One of ours is sneaking away for a few minutes for a quickie – gets us all hyped up," Tom was still grinning with that naughty look in his eyes that made Bill's stomach feel funny.

"Right..." Bill mumbled uncomfortably. "When did we start with that habit?"

"Hm..." Tom thought about it for a second before shrugging; "I'm not sure. A pretty long time ago. When we were 17, I think?"

"That's next year!" Bill pointed out horrified.

"Yeah. And it was all your doing," Tom grinned.

"Ugh, why is everything always my fault?!" Bill asked meekly, not able to believe that he would really initiate all these things; it didn't seem like him at all. His brother was supposed to be the assertive horndog who was up for sex at all times.

"Because you're not as shy as me," his brother said thoughtfully, but Bill was quite sure he was joking and burst out laughing.

"Of course. Yeah, you're definitely the shyer one of us when it comes to casual sex before shows!" Bill snorted out between laughter.

"I'm the shyer one when it comes to everything, actually, and it's not casual sex, it's just quick sex - there's a difference," Tom corrected pointedly.

"What difference?! That's the exact same thing. The definition of casual sex is having it casually at random moments such as half an hour before a show!" Bill exclaimed, throwing his one free arm that wasn't tucked under his head, in the air to make his point.

"No. Casual sex means having it casually with people who mean nothing to you. A quickie says nothing about the importance of the sex, it just says that it's something that doesn't take long. And it's more like five minutes before a show," he added with another wicked smirk.

"Five minutes?!" Bill nearly shrieked.

"Quickie," Tom reminded him with a grin; "Besides, you know how stressful it is before a show - there's no time for half-an-hour-sex."

Bill really couldn't imagine doing that in just five minutes. Five minutes weren't even long enough for him to be... ready for... anything – least of all be done after such a short time; Bill was generally slow in that department, so it was difficult to imagine, especially because before every show he was so nervous he was quite sure he wouldn't be 'up' for that.

'Oh my god, I'm going to turn into a freaking sex monster when I'm older' Bill groaned mentally; "Is that even good?" he asked dubiously, not being able to image a quick five minutes to be that good.

"Maybe not as good as five-hour-sex, but it's still pretty good," Tom chuckled at Bill's expression.

"You're kidding, right? We don't actually have sex for five hours, right?" Bill asked even more dubious than before.

Tom just laughed harder; "Sometimes. Of course that's mostly foreplay and stuff... But there's nothing better than spending an entire afternoon in bed with you, trading random sexual favors for trips to the kitchen."

"What?" Bill laughed embarrassed, not being able to take his eyes off his brother's sudden warm smile.

"You know... 'I'll blow you if you go get the ice cream and chocolate syrup'," Tom grinned.

Bill burst out laughing; up until recently, they traded favors such as doing each other's hair for trips to the kitchen. 'How times have changed...'

"That sounds better than five-minute-sex before a show," Bill giggled, still somewhat embarrassed about the things he would once be doing.

"It is... but there's no time for that during tours," Tom was still smiling that affectionate smile.

"Yeah, I guess not," Bill nodded slowly.

"Which might actually be a good thing because that way we always really enjoy the little private-time we have for each other," Tom added thoughtfully; "It keeps our lives from becoming routine and boring."

Now that made a lot of sense to Bill; almost everyone he knew had fallen into a life like that, and he had always been scared it would happen to him too someday. "So the fact that we only have time for five minute quickies most of the time, keeps our relationship alive?"

"No, we keep it alive. But I'm sure the quickies make it really good," Tom grinned wickedly, stealing a kiss from him.

Bill giggled into the kiss, by now feeling almost completely comfortable with this situation. He wriggled his body another bit closer to Tom's so their bodies were fully touching, and deepened the kiss with a quiet sigh. As comfortable as he already felt around the older Tom, he had a feeling with the one his own age things would be different; the mere thought of doing this with the brother who waited in the past for him, instead of this new, older version of Tom, made him really nervous. The future Tom was so patient, affectionate and understanding while the past Tom was... impatient, demanding and distant.

"Tom?" Bill breathed between their kissing.

"Hm?" his brother answered lazily, pulling away an inch to look at him.

"Back then... ten years ago, I mean... When we first got together, was it really awkward?" Bill asked stupidly.

"You mean the sex, or just being together?" Tom raised an eyebrow, pulling away a little bit more.

"I don't know... Both?" Bill shrugged.

Apparently Tom had to think about this for a moment before slowly answering; "Well... I think for me it was more awkward than for you," he chuckled; "At least at first. It took me a while to get used to the whole thing of being with you, and you knowing everything I felt for you, and all that stuff... Of course the sex thing was another matter altogether – we were both really awkward and nervous there, but don't worry about it," he assured immediately when Bill was about to freak out.

"Why does that always have to be awkward?" Bill whined miserably.

"Because sex is always awkward the first time, no matter how familiar you are with someone," Tom laughed.

They had already had a conversation like this once, but Bill was still beyond nervous about it; there was something really weird about knowing that in 10 years having sex with a certain person that you've never been with was going to be normal...

"Maybe Bill is right... Maybe I should put this time traveling thing to good use and learn something useful," Bill sent his older twin a tentative glance.

Tom raised a surprised eyebrow, an amused grin spreading across his face; "Oh?"

"And who could teach me what you want better than you, right?" Bill mumbled with a blush, biting his lip.

Tom chuckled, pulling him into another quick kiss before speaking; "Hm, yeah. I can tell you all the things I was too shy to tell you 10 years ago," he grinned against Bill's lips.

Bill just nodded, glad their faces were so close together his brother wasn't able to see the blush that decorated his entire face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to let you know that this is the last written chapter I have so far, so the next one is going to take a while to be updated... I'll try to hurry but unfortunately i'm rather slow...


	21. Chapter 21

They carried on kissing on the carpet, too lazy to move to the bed or back on the couch, and Bill groped his older twin's body to his heart's content. He felt playful and wanted to explore every inch of Tom's body to see what it felt like to touch, and what it made his brother feel. It was actually a rather big surprise to him, how daring he was and how little awkward this situation had become after Tom had said that he had been really nervous in their past. Of course the fact that he was really turned on also lowered his inhibitions tremendously, and left him with the desire to actually have sex; something that had never really happened until now. Usually, even though sometimes curious, he was very reserved about it and had never seriously considered having it with anyone, but right now it just seemed right and he was actually emotionally ready too and not just physically.

Tentatively, he broke their kiss and began kissing down Tom's neck to his chest instead, his hands still moving a bit further down as well until they reached his brother's waistband; that's about as far as he dared to go right now, though he was dying to explore the rest as well. Should he dare?

Raising his head a bit, he gave Tom an uncertain look, but his twin just smiled warmly. "Don't ever do anything you're not ready to do." He said gently, sitting up a bit and pulling him into a quick kiss before lying back down into the pillows.

"But if I am ready, then I can do anything I want?" Bill asked hesitantly and Tom laughed.

"Anything you want," he assured him with a grin.

Bill bit his lip as he thought about it for a second; "What did you want? Ten years ago, I mean."

Tom thought about it for a second before answering slowly. "I wanted things to move a bit slower, but I didn't know how to tell you because I had wanted to be with you for so long."

"What?" Bill asked in disbelief; Tom never wanted things to be slow.

"Well we moved a bit too fast. We went from kissing right over to sex the way that people often do, but that also led to the fact that it wasn't really all that good the first few times. Neither of us had done that before and we moved a bit too quickly. We both felt that way but neither wanted to say anything because we both thought the other wanted it like that," Tom laughed a bit. "He should have talked about it a bit more and not just done it like people do in movies. A little bit more... preparation would have made things a lot more pleasant. Unfortunately these are things that most people don't talk about. They just move straight to penetration and that can be rather uncomfortable and painful at the beginning."

"But you have 5 minute sex before concerts..." Bill pointed out; there couldn't be a lot of anything at all in such a short time.

Tom laughed; "Yes, but not at first. Sex is something your body needs to adjust to, at least if you're on the passive end. You need to learn to relax or it's going to hurt, and that takes a while. For some people it's just a few times, for others it's longer. Being spontaneously ready for a 5 minute quickie takes time... And even then you still need to take at least a minute before anyone is relaxed enough. I'm sure there are people who don't need that, who just randomly stick things in there without any preparation whatsoever, but... neither of us enjoys it like that," he chuckled a bit before continuing; Especially at first that was a problem for both of us... Bottoming was always a sacrifice that we only did for the other, but not something we really enjoyed that much at first because it was uncomfortable and partially even quite painful until we finally got used to it and learned to relax. But if we would have moved a bit slower, we would have probably spared us those few things..."

"Oh," Bill nodded slowly, making sure to remember all that even though he wasn't entirely certain what his brother meant in detail.

"Just keep in mind that we have at least ten years together, so there's no need to rush it," Tom smiled gently, caressing his cheek.

Bill nodded again, regaining his playfulness; "So teach me something I'll need. How do we start ten years ago?"

Tom laughed heartedly; "Well... oral sex is always a really good way to get comfortable with someone without there being much that you can do wrong, or anyone that can get hurt."

"Like that the other day..." Bill said slowly, referring to the night a few days ago where his older self and Tom had sucked him.

"Yes, like that. It makes both people involved more comfortable and it's a good way to initiate sexual intimacy. And it's also easily combinable with light penetration to get accustomed to it before actually using... larger body parts for it," Tom grinned suggestively and Bill had to laugh; Tom had such a funny way of expressing himself sometimes. It was very... teenage friendly, in Bill's opinion. Maybe he was just trying not to freak him out.

"Who is going to be the first of us to bottom?" Bill asked slowly, wanting to mentally prepare himself for the past, though he had a feeling it was going to be him.

"Me," Tom nodded.

"What?! You? Why you?" Bill asked in disbelief.

"I don't know... Why should it be you?" Tom raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know... Because you've already had sex really often." Bill had no idea why he thought it had been him, it just seemed to make more sense.

"Not with guys. I don't know why it was me... I think that bottoming just takes more trust and I wanted to show you that I trusted you. And you were sort of scared of it so..."

"So you sacrificed yourself for it?" Bill asked drily, causing Tom to laugh again.

"Kinda, yeah," he nodded with a grin.

"I'll do it better this time," Bill promised, receiving a warm smile from his brother. "So..." he said suggestively; "What's my first lesson?"

His older twin chuckled again. "How about we focus on oral sex first?"

"Good! I kinda remember how that went from... the other day..." he said slowly, feeling a blush creeping into his face.

Tom just carried on laughing as he pulled him close again for another kiss; "If you want I can refresh your memory first," he grinned wickedly.

Bill raised a playful eyebrow; "Oh. Yeah, maybe you should do that. Just to make sure I get it right."

His twin chuckled against his lips, wrapping his arms tightly around him and pulling him down on the carpet. For a few seconds Bill lay on top of his twin as they kissed, until Tom rolled them to their sides and his hands began to travel down Bill's naked upper body to his hips where they paused for a second before slipping inside his sweatpants and underwear.

Bill made an undefined noise into his brother's mouth when Tom suddenly began to grope his ass. For some odd reason it was something that Bill actually enjoyed; he had always hated people touching him there, but now it really turned him on.

Their kissing carried on for a while and it wasn't long before they had discarded the few clothing articles they had still been wearing, and Bill snuggled close to his brother's hot, naked body. It felt so comfortable, and their bodies fit perfect against each other while they kissed until they ran out of air.  
Tom took the opportunity to slide further down, kissing along Bill's shoulders, chest and eventually stomach, while his hands caressed down his thighs before he gently began stroking him. Already beginning to get lost in the delicious touch, Bill rolled from his side to his back to give Tom easier access to his body, and let his legs fall limply to the sides with a quiet gasp as his brother suddenly ran his tongue along his sensitive length.

The movements were slow and soft, and he could feel each stroke of his twin's tongue that slowly circles him while Tom's mouth gently moved up and down around him until Bill was moaning in delight.   
It only took a few moments until Bill was unable to concentrate on what his twin was doing, and simply enjoyed the pleasure. His initial intention had been to learn something, but he was unable to focus on what exactly it was that was being done to him because it was simply too good to pay attention to details. All of Tom's delicious movements soon melted into one hazed mess inside Bill's mind and had him moaning deliriously.

It had been a few days already since Bill had 'taken care of himself', so it wasn't long before he was ready; alright, so maybe even a quick 5 minutes were good, given the right circumstances. With a quiet mewl and gasp, and without really having learned anything at all, Bill climaxed into his brother's skilled mouth that began to slow down while he rode out his orgasm. Of course he had been turned on for quite a while already, but still he had thought this would take him longer; it was all Tom's fault - he just seemed to know exactly how Bill liked it. Obviously, they'd been together for nearly ten years, after all...

While Bill took a few deep breaths, resting his head against one of the pillows that had fallen from the couch, Tom slowly crept up again, placing soft kisses along his shoulders before lying down next to him.

"Well that was quick," Tom sniggered quietly, kissing the tip of his ear.

Lazily Bill turned his head towards him and gave him a stupid smile; "And I don't think I learned anything," he mumbled.

Tom laughed. "Want me to do it again?"

"No!" Bill giggled embarrassed, snuggling close to him and wrapping his arms around him while Tom kissed the top of his head; it felt so perfect. Would it be like this in the past...?

Slowly Bill lifted his head to kiss his brother again; somehow at this moment he wished he could just stay in the future forever and not have to go home anymore. There was no way the Tom from the past was as amazing as the Tom from the future, right?

"My turn," Bill giggled, pushing him down into the carpet.

Tom chuckled quietly, fixing the pillows under his head to lie more comfortably while Bill enthusiastically nibbled his way down his twin's toned chest.

It was only by the time he arrived at Tom's stomach, that he realized where the ultimate destination of his explorative journey was, and he got a bit nervous; he was supposed to give him a blowjob, right?   
Awkwardly he glanced down at the place he had avoided looking at; Tom was a lot... more grown up there as well. Bill groaned internally. What was he supposed to do now? Should he just touch it? It's not like he'd never touched a dick before, he had one too, after all, but... still. Touching someone else there was a lot more awkward, even if it was Tom. Maybe particularly because it was Tom...

Just as Bill was about to reach down with a slightly shaky hand, Tom suddenly sat upright and hastily grabbed Bill's hand.

"Wha-?"

"Ssh!" Tom silenced him with a hand over his mouth.

And then Bill heard it. Someone opening the apartment door.

"There's no way that's Bill," Tom whispered slightly panicked, glancing at his watch that told them the blond Bill hadn't been gone long enough for any kind of photoshoot. "It has to be Ria or David... Or the Gs. No one else has a key."

Bill began to panic; what if someone just found him here with his twin, completely naked and in the middle of... well... something that left no room for second guesses?!

However before either of them managed to bolt from the room, the door to the living room opened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuuunnnnnnnnn


	22. Chapter 22

Bill stared in horror as the door fully opened, and then nearly died of relief as he saw his older self standing there with an amused grin on his face.

“What are you guys doing?” the blond asked with a wicked grin.

“What are you doing back already?” Tom asked in return, still sitting on the ground.

“Jill, our photographer, was stuck in traffic because there was an accident somewhere, so it was postponed until the day after tomorrow,” the older Bill shrugged, dropping his bag and jacket carelessly on the floor before sitting down to take his elaborate shoes off. “And what are you two naughtys up to?” He grinned.  

Bill was hiding behind the couch, feeling totally awkward just sitting there naked on the living room floor. Tom didn’t seem to feel awkward at all because he just sat there in the middle of the carpet, fully exposed to Bill’s older self who was staring at them shamelessly.

“I was about to teach you a bit about oral sex, but you interrupted that,” Tom chuckled, and Bill blushed in humiliation – did Tom really have to say it like that?!

“Oh my god!” the older Bill gasped in delight. “I’m about to give my first blowjob? Aw! I want to watch!”

“No!” Bill yelled at himself in outrage while Tom burst out laughing.

“Oh come on! No one knows how to give Tom better head than me! Right Tom?” the blond demanded, not waiting for a reply; “I could teach you!”

“No!” Bill refused vehemently; he was nervous enough while alone with Tom, he really didn’t need an audience.

“Yes!” his older self insisted, getting up from his chair and reaching them with just a few, long strides.

Bill hid behind one of the larger pillows from the couch while his older self roughly pushed Tom back down on the carpet before kissing him passionately. Tom was still chuckling a bit, but didn’t object his twin’s doing, so for a few seconds Bill watched while his twins kissed, before the blond pulled away from Tom and crawled over to Bill with a tentative smile.

Though Bill felt completely awkward, still sitting naked on the floor with nothing but a pillow, he accepted his older self’s quick, greeting kiss.

“Ready to learn something?” His older self giggles naughtily and pulled him closer by his arm.

Bill just mumbled something random under his breath because he didn’t know what to say.

“Ok, so first things first.” The blond instructed; “Let’s get a bit acquainted with what we’ve got here. Since I’m you, I know that you’re pretty bad at giving hand jobs and-”

“Hey!” Bill objected loudly while Tom sniggered in the background.

“Just face it, Bill. You have no practice in that department and that’s your own fault because you never bothered to do it right. It’s a miracle I even managed to cum with the way you did things back then - or the way I did things back then, whatever. The point!” the blond yelled as Bill was about to interrupt him; “Is that you need to do that a bit better here, and I’m going to show you how!”

Bill groaned loudly; this was the most humiliating moment of his entire life. And he himself was causing it… Technically seen.

“Alrighty then!” The older Bill clapped his hands enthusiastically; “So first we take - in this case - Tom’s dick here,” he took a hold of Tom who was still laughing quietly, “and then we slowly move our hand up and down. But not like you always do it – not just 20 seconds of brash movements until we cum, but nicely… slowly and patiently…” While he spoke, the blond demonstrated on the test subject what he was referring to.

Bill watched attentively as his older self slowly stroked their hard twin for a little bit before continuing with his speech.

“So once we are sure that Tom is thoroughly turned on, we can proceed with the more complicated parts. Now don’t be shy, there’s a lot of things that you can try out because there’s no way I can teach you everything in the few short days we’ve still got, plus it’s really fun to experiment around a bit, but I will show you some of the basics.” The blond Bill explained while he settled more comfortably, leaning over Tom’s body.

“There are a few things that we need to pay attention to while giving a blowjob: though in soft amounts pleasant, teeth should be watched out for or it can get seriously uncomfortable; it’s not possible to both breathe and have a dick down your throat at the same time, so you have to time that right and breathe in accordance with your movements; we need to swallow, and I’m not talking about Tom right now, but just regularly,” he grinned with a nod. “Any questions?”

“Um… no,” Bill mumbled stupidly, shaking his head. He didn’t really know exactly what his older self was talking about in detail, but he would probably find out soon.

“Great! Then let’s move on. Now that we have the theory, let’s try it out in praxis.” The blond said enthusiastically as he lowered his head towards Tom’s erection.

Bill lowered his head as well to keep a good view on his older mouth that was just an inch away from Tom. “First we pay attention to the teeth, so keep your mouth open enough as to not scratch too hard.” His future self instructed and then demonstrated what he was talking about.

Oddly fascinated, Bill watched as his older self gradually wrapped his mouth around Tom’s hard-on, eliciting an almost inaudible moan from their twin somewhere.  
Very slowly, the blond moved up and down Tom’s length, keeping Tom’s sensitive flesh safe from his teeth with his lips, and breathing slowly and evenly.

After a few more up and down movements, the older Bill slowly pulled away. “Ok, so at first you don’t want to take him in too deep because otherwise it’ll make you gag and that’s awful. Just do it however you’re comfortable, and try to relax your throat muscles around it. But take your time, there's no rush. Also, let’s not forget that 16 year old Tom is a bit smaller, so you should have an easier time with that,” he added with a smirk.

“Right,” Bill mumbled awkwardly, unsure of what to do next; he wasn’t sure he wanted to do this with his older self around…

Obviously his future self noticed his discomfort, because he carried on talking and didn’t expect Bill to practice all this right now.

“Tom’s most sensitive dick-area is the head, obviously, so while the whole in and out thingy is very pleasant and good for orgasming, there’s plenty of other stuff to be done in between – after all, a blowjob can last a few hours, and going in and out the whole time gets mundane and boring, not to mention painful for your jaw.”

“A-a few hours?!” Bill stuttered in disbelief.

“Sure, if you have the time. Most people don’t bother for it, but it’s nice once in a while,” the blond grinned cheerfully. “And of course for that we use our tongue. There are countless things that you can do with it,” he said as he lowered his head again, running his tongue along Tom’s length and then twirling around his head.

Tom moaned quietly in the background and Bill watched in fascination.

“There’s also all sorts of strong or light sucking, and of course the combination of various things. There’s no 'one right way', and usually when combined it’s the best. Really soft and really strong are both good, but don’t do too much of one or the other. And don’t ever actually blow into it, because that’s wrong,” the older Bill sniggered; “I have no idea why it’s even called a _blow_ job, but whatever – don’t do it.” Future Bill instructed amused before continuing to nibble around on Tom’s erection while Bill processed all the new information.

“Alright so…” Bill concluded; “Sucking, licking, nibbling but no blowing. Watching the teeth, swallowing, breathing…”

“Mhm,” his older self murmured around a mouthful of Tom.

“Okok! I got it. Let me try it now,” Bill gently shoved himself out of the way and stared down at his older twin’s erection that was wet from the blonde's mouth.

Hesitantly he wrapped his fingers around the soft, wet skin, and gently slid his hand up and down the slick surface. It actually felt a lot like his own, but somehow now he was a lot more aware of it; the texture, size, temperature, and the hard tissue underneath the thin, silken skin that was crossed by various pulsing veins.

It was actually completely different than touching himself. This was a lot better, he concluded soon. His future self had been right earlier – Bill had never been very keen on the self pleasuring part and was probably very bad at it. But that was just because it had never interested him much… Unlike this situation now.

Carefully he glanced over at Tom to see his reaction, but his twin was lying completely relaxed against the pillows, his head tilted slightly backwards and his eyes closed, so Bill looked over at his future self for further instructions.  
The older Bill nodded encouragingly, folding his legs underneath him and resting his elbows on one of the large pillows.

The encouragement worked well, and now he was glad that his older self was there with him to make sure he did everything correctly. Or as correct as anyone can do it the first time.

Hesitantly and awkwardly, with another uncertain look at his older self, he finally lowered his head until the tip of Tom’s erection brushed against his lips. The skin felt almost softer than it did to his fingertips, and Bill gave it a tentative lick that caused Tom to jerk slightly and then chuckle.

Just to make sure things were still going right, Bill glanced up at his older self, and after receiving another reassuring nod, he continued with the tentative licking. It tasted a bit salty, but not unpleasantly so. Curiously, he took a bit more into his mouth, brushing his lips over the smooth surface, and then ran his tongue along the outlines of the glans until Tom moaned loudly.

Bill looked over at his older self who was lying on a pillow next to him, watching what he was doing and grinning. Obviously he was on the right track, so he continued with his explorative journey and gently began to suck around on the swollen tip until Tom was groaning again, and the Bill next to him giggling quietly.

“Don’t be too harsh on him or he’ll get too sensitive very quickly,” the blond advised with a wicked grin.

Bill nodded, having his mouth too full to speak, and released a bit of the suction, taking more of Tom into his mouth in the same motion.  
Just like his future self had done earlier, he began to move up and down, letting his twin’s length slide softly in and out of his mouth.

“Don’t put it in too deep,” his older self warned quietly, creeping a little closer to take a better look; “And while you’re doing that, you can also let your tongue play around with him a bit.”

Bill nodded again, trying to combine the up and down movement with the tongue movement; multitasking had never been his strength. Tentatively he let his tongue lap at Tom’s erection while he let him slide into his mouth, and once he retreated again, he twirled it around the tip.  
Next to him, his future self was nodding, observing closely what he was doing.

"Ok good, and while you're pulling out, suck a bit, but not too hard," the older Bill instructed, and Bill did as he was told. Judging by the sounds coming from Tom, he was doing a decent job so far.

However, after a few more minutes of testing around what he could do with his tongue while he had a dick in his mouth, Bill’s jaw eventually started to hurt a bit. How the hell was someone supposed to do this for an hour, or even longer?

Giving his twin another soft suck, he pulled his head up again and took a deep breath; this whole blowjob thing was a lot more complicated than he had anticipated.

“Shall I take over for a minute?” His older self asked with a smirk.

Bill laughed awkwardly and nodded, releasing his twin and sitting back a bit to give his blond self more space. The older Bill continued where he had left off, slowly nibbling and licking around their twin’s length while Bill settled himself more comfortably, lying his head on Tom’s stomach to watch closely what his future self was doing there.


	23. Chapter 23

It wasn't long before Bill's jaw was fully rested and he was ready to give it another try. "Ok, my turn again," he told his older self and gave him a gentle push. 

The blond Bill giggled quietly as he let Bill take over again, who proceeded in the same fashion as before, approaching Tom's wet cock until it brushed against his lips, and then slowly let it glide into his mouth again. Now that he already knew what was expecting him, he wasn't so shy anymore and eagerly played around with his tongue against Tom's length. There was something oddly fascinating because certain movements managed to lure specific sounds from his twin, and Bill was determined to find out which action got which reaction.

"If you take him deep into your mouth, relax around it and just hold him there for a few moments, it feels super good," the blond whispered into his ear; "But only as far as it's comfortable - don't choke on it." He added quickly. 

Bill just nodded a bit, trying out what his older self had said. Very slowly he lowered his head further down, accommodating his tongue around Tom's pulsing cock, and trying to relax his throat muscles around the inconveniently big object in his mouth. How porn stars managed to do this so easily in movies was beyond him; this was actually very difficult, not to mention he couldn't breathe while at it. But of course Tom's delectable moaning was a fair reward, so Bill decided to try that out a few more times. After having run out of air, he lifted his head a bit again, gently sucking on his twin while he took a few breaths of air before lowering his head again to give it another try.  
Apparently the older Bill had been right - Tom seemed to be enjoying himself quite a lot with this. After a few more tries, Bill was really getting the hang of it and managed to take him in and out of his mouth in one smooth motion that had Tom moaning in pleasure.

"I know that people often say that faster is way better, but that's not actually true - at least not always. Though fast and rough generally leads to cumming quicker, slow and soft gives longer and better orgasms, so take your time." The older Bill murmured quietly into his ear, and Bill just nodded in return before slowly lifting his head again to speak.

"How long before I'm actually good at this?" he asked stupidly; the oral sex thing was really difficult.

"Trust me, you're way better than Bill was when he was your age," Tom chuckled.

"Hey!" The blond complained, slapping loudly against Tom's thigh. "The only reason he's way better is because I'm teaching him!"

"Ow! I was just kidding!" Tom laughed, grabbing his twin's hand before it managed to slap him again, and pulled him over into a rough kiss between fits of laughter.

Bill watched in amusement, reminded again that these days were numbered. Why couldn't he just stay here? But then what about Tom? The one waiting for him in the past? Bill had developed such a crush on the older version of his twin that he wasn't sure if he ever wanted to go home again. Of course he knew that Tom was waiting for him in the past, but he really really liked the Tom from the future... He was far more amazing than the Tom from the past would ever be. At least not for another 10 years... Bill really didn't want to wait that long for the love of his life to show up again. This whole situation was just twisted – why couldn't the young Tom be like the old Tom?

"Bill!" His older self called him over, getting his attention.

"What?" Bill asked confused.

"Come kiss Tom," the blond giggled, dragging him over to a laughing Tom who rolled his eyes.

"I'm really annoying," Bill said to his older self who stuck his tongue out.

"Shut up and kiss him." He laughed, giving Bill a gentle shove towards Tom was still lying on the pillows, laughing.

Bill leaned over his twin, momentarily locking eyes with him; Tom always had the gentlest of smiles in his eyes – something Bill wasn't used to at all, but loved more than anything. Tentatively he gave his older twin a small kiss that soon intensified as the blond cupped his head, gently pushing him towards Tom who wrapped an arm around him, drawing him closer until he was practically lying on top of him.   
The fact that the blond was fully dressed while he and Tom were fully naked, made Bill slightly self-conscious, especially now that he was lying on top of Tom's very aroused body, with his twin's erection pressing against his leg - while his older self just sat there watching them in his typical shameless fashion. Older Bill was such a creep. Would he really grow up to be like that...? Apparently...

"Seriously Bill," Bill eventually complained, breaking the kiss with his twin. "Either join us or get out - you're making me nervous!"

Tom burst out laughing while the blond gave him an innocent look. "Whaat? I didn't do anything!"

"Like, right now!" Bill ordered sternly.

"Yeah, seriously Bill," Tom agreed with a smirk, "either take your clothes off or get out."

Now it was Bill's turn to laugh despite being slightly embarrassed by the whole situation. "Yes, what Tom said."

"Alright alright, if ya'll insist!" The blond laughed, removing his shirt and throwing it to the side before leaning down towards them with a naughty smirk that made him look so different from what Bill was used to from himself.

Bill pulled himself up a bit as the blond joined them, first giving Bill a passionate kiss and then Tom who had one arm around Bill's shoulders while his other snaked around older Bill's waist.

"Aren't you going to offer me your help?" The future Bill asked Bill with another smirk.

For a second Bill just stared at him, unsure what he should do now; ok so undressing himself was one thing but... undressing himself in ten years...?

Luckily for him, Tom interrupted the horrible situation with another loud laugh, and pulled the older Bill down on the carpet. "Stop teasing your poor self all the time," he berated the blond, groping him through his tight clothes and biting into his shoulder until the blond wailed in a mixture of pleasure, pain and amusement.

Uncertain what to do, Bill just sat there, watching his twin groping his older self until Tom waved him over with an amused smirk.

"Yeah Bill, don't be shy around yourself," his older self grinned and stretched out his arms to pull him close once he was within reach. Bill just laughed weakly - this whole situation was so bizarre, he didn't know what to think or feel about it.

Without warning, the blond suddenly pulled him into a deep kiss, and by the time they came up for air, Tom had succeeding in removing future Bill's remaining clothes, and joined them for another round of heated kisses.

The kisses with both his twins was probably what Bill would miss the most once he went back home; as weird and twisted as his future self was, Bill would really miss him. Which was weird since he would one day become that person, but still. How did one even miss themselves...? Twas weird.

"So..." The blond murmured quietly once Bill and Tom were done with another round of kissing.

"Who's going to have sex with whom today?" He asked coyly, setting his eyes on Bill.

Of course Bill knew that that was the general direction in which things were headed, but he wasn't sure if he was ready for that. Well actually he was. He really wanted to have sex - especially with Tom, because he felt comfortable and safe - even more so with his older self around. This might actually be the perfect moment for him to have his first time: with his older, experienced twin that he was head over heels in love with, and himself from the future who knew exactly what was happening and who could keep him from doing anything wrong. These two people cared more about him than anyone else in the world, so this was probably the best moment to do it. Plus he was really horny.   
' _No but seriously, Bill!_ ' He chastised himself mentally, trying to think reasonably of what was happening around here. For the first time in his life he actually felt ready because he knew that Tom was the one – the one he'd been waiting for and the one he'd be spending at least 10 years with.

"I'm just asking what you want," the blond Bill said gently, giving him one of those reassuring smiles.

"And I'm sure Tom wouldn't mind being a test subject again," he added with a smirk, earning a quiet laugh from their twin.

"Don't let him push you into something you don't want – you know how pushy you can be," Tom chuckled.

"Shush it, Tom," the blond gave him a light smack on his arm. "I'm not trying to push you into anything, I'm just trying to say that we both know what we're doing so if there's anything you're uncertain about – and trust me, there will be – we can clarify the situation better than Tom could ten years ago. Because let's face it, 16 year old Tom was a total chicken when it came to saying what he truly wanted."

"Because you were so much better." Tom smiled, cocking his eyebrow at his twin.

"I was not. Which is why I'm trying to do myself a favor here," the older Bill said pointedly. "And you too. Let's not forget that everything we teach me here, will be to your benefit, mister!" He pointed at Tom who raised both eyebrows and grinned. "But still, Billy – choice is all yours. You just need to tell us what you want," he leered naughtily.

"First I want you to never call me 'Billy' again," Bill said drily.

"So not happening, Billy. Now... in the mood for sex?" The blond smirked, crawling over to him on all fours and giving him a seductive look.

Bill insides were fluttering with excitement at his words and actions – there was something really intriguing about this situation, and even though it wasn't at all what he had imagined his first time to be (obviously, who really think they will go 10 years into the future, fall in love with their twin and then be seduced by themselves into having a threesome with yourself and your time, I mean come on...) he was still really turned on and wanted this. It just seemed right. He felt so comfortable around his twins, far more than he could ever imagine feeling around the Tom from the past with whom this whole thing would probably just be weird and awkward, this having sex with these two right now was probably a good idea. And it would make things less awkward once he got back home, because then he'd already know what he was doing... Back home there was no older Bill who would instruct him and keep him from making any really embarrassing mistakes.

Slowly Bill nodded, accepting a reassuring kiss from his future self who got up a second later. "I'll be right back!" He announced cheerfully, disappearing into his bedroom.

"Where's he going?" Bill asked Tom who was still lying on carpet, head prepped on the couch pillows.

"To get lubricant," Tom chuckled.

"Oh right. Of course..." Bill mumbled awkwardly; he should have known that, right?

"Are you sure you're up for this? I know Bill is really eager for you to do this, but that doesn't mean you have to. You know how annoying you can sometimes get." Tom smiled fondly while Bill laughed a bit.

"Yeah I know... but... I really..." Bill wanted to tell his twin how he felt about him, but couldn't find the right words. He had never actually told anyone that he was in love with them before - how did one just say that?

"You really what?" Tom asked gently.

 


	24. Chapter 24

"I... um... Enjoy your company," Bill muttered stupidly, causing Tom to laugh.

"Oh, you enjoy my company?" He asked with a grin. "Well that's a relief, I must say."

Bill gave him a dry look but couldn't help a smile; ok, so maybe that wasn't the best phrasing, but he just didn't know how to word it properly. "I mean that I really like you and... Well more than everyone else, of course and... I don't know." He finished dully.

This time Tom frowned a bit, but before he managed to say anything, the blond was back with a bottle of lube.

"Why are you guys just sitting here when you should be making out, at the very least?" The future Bill grinned, stealing a kiss from his twin as he sat down beside him on the carpet, twirling the bottle in his fingers. Bill rolled his eyes at his future self and laughed, despite being a bit worried what that earlier frown from Tom had been about.

"Something happen while I was gone...?" The older Bill questioned, looking back and forth between them; obviously the future Bill also noticed that something was off with Tom.

"No, you just told me that you loved me and wanted to spend the rest of your life with me." Tom grinned.

"Aw!" The blond cooed at Bill who was staring at Tom; that wasn't what he had said. Or was it...?

"And as much as I love you," Tom looked at Bill with a warm smile, "I don't want to have sex with you."

Both Bills stared at Tom in total disbelief. "Say what?" The older one demanded.

Tom gave him a wary look. "I want your first time to be with me. In the past, I mean. Not with us here... You know how much it always meant to me that I was the only one you ever gave yourself to... I don't want that to be different between us." Tom looked back and forth between the two Bills, seeking for their understanding.

Bill looked at his older self who gave him a warm smile and gentle nod. "I think he might have a point... You will love the Tom from the past as much as you love this one, right?"

As much as Bill wanted to say yes, he knew he'd be lying. The Tom from the past was different than this one, so how could he feel the same about him? The older Tom was so loving, gentle, considerate and amazing while the Tom from the past was a sleazy horndog who treated Bill... well, the way brothers treat each other; he wasn't at all what Bill wanted. Bill wanted a mature, caring lover, not an immature, horny bastard like the one who was waiting for him at home. Of course he loved the Tom from the past, but only as a brother... There was nothing about him that Bill yearned for in a partner.

"Bill?" Tom asked softly, sitting up and giving him an intent look. "I am the same Tom who is waiting for you at home right now. At this very moment, 10 years ago, I'm sitting by your bed, praying that you'll wake up soon. Please don't discard my love for... for the love I'm giving you right now. You're not meant to be in love with me right now, but with me 10 years ago."

"But I don't like you ten years ago, I like you now," Bill said miserably. Why couldn't he just stay in the future? His stupid older self was such a lucky bastard...

"But ten years ago I was me too," Tom reasoned gentle.

"No you weren't!" Bill denied, "You were a total idiot that I would never fall in love with!"

"That's not true Bill." His older self wrapped his arms around him from behind while Tom looked a bit crestfallen. "The Tom from ten years ago is really nice too, you just don't know it yet. Give him a chance... I promise that you'll fall in love with him just the way I did."

Bill slumped against his older self with a tragic sigh. "But I don't want to have sex with him... That Tom is really nasty and has had sex with thousands of people!" He complained sadly.

"It was not thousands!" Tom objected. "Maybe a few hundred..."

"Tom!" The older Bill slapped his shoulder.

"I was just saying... Besides! I had sex with the exact same people Tom from the past did – obviously. So as to that, it really makes no difference." Tom reasoned again, but Bill still didn't agree.

"But that was a long time ago, and now I know that you're actually... Well, the way that you are, and I like the way you are. But that other Tom..." Bill trailed off sadly.

"There is no _'other Tom'_ , Bill. There's only me. The current me and the one I used to be ten years ago – we're one and the same person." Tom tried again, not wavering from that gentle, understanding tone he always had. The one Bill had never heard in the younger Tom before.

"But I don't want to be with you ten years ago," Bill stood his ground, despite knowing how stupid it was. "Ten years ago you were really uncaring... You just care about your own needs and don't give a shit what anyone else feels – and don't tell me it isn't so, because you've said that various times."

"I meant other people. I always cared about what you felt – more than I ever cared about anything else." Tom denied.

"That's not true. We fight all the time, have you already forgotten that? We don't agree on anything, and you're always nasty to me," Bill mumbled feebly; it's not like he was actually upset at the younger Tom, that's how their relationship had always been, but that kind of behavior wasn't one he wanted in a partner. He wanted a romantic, sweet partner like the older Tom, who didn't treat him like a pal or brother, but like a lover; someone who took his needs and wishes into consideration and gave him those amazing smiles that the older Tom always had for him.

"I know that, but how else am I meant to treat you? Don't you think this kind of behavior would be a bit weird for brothers who...who are only brother? Back then I was trying to be a normal brother and not seem suspicious. What would you have thought if our relationship would be like it is now?" His older twin smiled gently, obviously still trying to reason with him, and despite knowing he was right, Bill shook his head.

"I would not have thought it was weird. Back when we were little you were a lot nicer, and then all of a sudden you became 'cool'. It sucked." Bill complained darkly while his older self giggled quietly.

"Yeah Tom, why did you become cool? It was so lame." The blond grinned at their twin who gave him an amused smile and a raised eyebrow.

"I didn't become cool, I just developed a crush on you and didn't know how to handle it," he said as he turned back to Bill; obviously the future Bill already knew this information too.

"And when are you going to become normal like this?" Bill sighed.

"Actually that happens really fast. There's a few moments when he's still the idiot Tom, but mostly just because he forgot that he can be nice – but he always remembers quickly." The older Bill smiled at his twin and nodded. "As soon as we... 'got together', Tom was suddenly really different from one day to the next."

"Yeah because then I could finally be whom I've been wanting to be for so long but didn't think I ever could..." Tom returned the warm smile with a nod.

How could a person have two such different sides...? Had Tom seriously just pretended to be an idiot for... how many years? 5 or 6? Possibly longer...? How had Bill never realized that his brother was just faking it the entire time? Well, he knew a little bit that his brother wasn't actually the way he let everyone think – Bill had always known there was more to his brother than the whoring son of a $@%§& that he always pretended to be, but he had just assumed Tom didn't know that yet and would eventually mature; had Tom really always been a lot more mature than he let others know...?  
No matter how often Bill thought of this possibility, the only conclusion he ever came to was that it would take Tom ten whole years to become the man he now was, and Bill wasn't sure he could wait that long.

"Hey," Tom said gently, cupping his cheek and giving him a gentle kiss. "I'll be fine, I promise."

"See?" Bill murmured sadly, "Why can't you be like this back then?"

"I can be. I just don't know yet that that's what you want." Tom smiled softly. "But if you tell me, I can be everything you ever wanted."

Bill mewled quietly; "Can't I just stay here with you?" he muttered against his twin's lips, closing his eyes for a few seconds.

"If I had a saying over it, you could, but there's nothing we can do to stop you from returning to the past. The only thing we can do is convince you that the past is just as great as the future, if you give it a chance." Tom said softly while he stroked his cheek.

Bill sighed sadly, leaning his head against Tom's bare shoulder; this really sucked. He would miss him so much... He only had a few more days... At least if things played out like last time and he would wake up on the 24th of September – today was the 21st. He only had around three days before... before something happened. How would he go back anyway? What would happen on the 21st?

"Come on, Bill," his older self said gently, rubbing his back; "It'll be fine. The Tom who's waiting for you in the past is really nice too. I know you don't like him the way you know him now, but he'll be different once you guys get past the whole _'we're just brothers'_ rubbish."

Tom laughed quietly at this statement, and Bill also had to smile; he had actually thought about that remotely little, given it was actually a pretty big deal. Well whatever, he would think about it later. He only had three days left, and he wouldn't squander them by being miserable.

"So you really won't have sex with me?" he asked coyly, lifting his head and smiling at Tom; of course he couldn't help the slight blush, but whatever.

The blond giggled while Tom chuckled a bit surprised. "I'm very tempted... and I mean really very very tempted," he sighed tragically, "But I think I would never forgive myself for that..." he looked over at the older Bill who smiled warmly and then nodded.

"I think Tom is right... You should really save that for the younger Tom."

"Great," Bill sighed dully. "So that's it – no more learning anything that will improve our sex life some day?" he asked with another small blush and a pout.

"That's not what I said!" the blond said wickedly, pushing Tom back down into the carpet; Tom stared up at him with a surprised/amused look but didn't try to resist as the future Bill shoved his tongue past his lips.

Bill laughed quietly; his older self was so weird.

"After all," the blond continued once he broke the kiss, "we want Tom's first time with us to be really good, and there's a bunch of things I know now that I didn't back then, but wish I did. And I'm going to show them to you so your first time with him will be more pleasant for him."

"Right," Bill nodded, a bit wide eyed; if he wasn't actually supposed to have sex with Tom, what was he supposed to do...? Watch while they did it?   
As awkward as he first thought that would be, he was actually very curious to see that. What would it be like...?

While Bill and Tom kissed, Bill settled more comfortably at a spot from which he had a good view, and shamelessly observed the love game between his older twins; would it be like this for him and Tom soon...?


	25. Chapter 25

"What are you doing over there? Get over here." blond Bill chuckled, waving Bill over to where he was leaning over Tom.

"What...? Aren't you guys going to...?" Bill muttered stupidly. "You know...?"

"Yes, now come over." His older self laughed, rolling his eyes.

"Oh, ok..." Bill mumbled awkwardly, crawling over to his anticipating older twin and amused self. Oh no, what weird things did the older Bill have in mind now?

The blond slid down Tom's body to lick around on him a bit while Bill settled next to him, watching his twin's cock sliding in and out of his older mouth a few times before the future Bill lifted his head again with a smile.

"Alright, so now that we know the basics of oral sex, let's move on the basics of anal sex, which you really need to learn because that is going to make your life sooo much better." The older Bill nodded firmly, though there was a wicked smile playing in his eyes.

Bill swallowed and nodded, getting really nervous all over again.

"So before we can get inside of Tom, there are a few things we need to make sure of first. The first part we have already accomplished well: Tom is hard – which is always the first step before anything else, and now we can proceed to preparing him for us so we won't hurt him when penetrating him." The blond explained wisely. "It's very important that Tom is hard before we move on, or he won't be very relaxed, and things may be uncomfortable for him – and we don't want that."

Bill nodded a bit awkwardly, feeling like a total pervert for simply sitting here, staring down at his aroused twin while his older self pointed out what he was referring to. This was definitely a very new kind of sex ed. In school it had been very different... Not so... practically applied.

"Now," the blond continued, snatching the bottle of lubricant, "give me your hand," he demanded, holding his hand out for Bill's.

"Um wait what?" Bill stuttered, staring at himself nervously; surely Bill wasn't expecting _him_ to... to _prepare_ Tom, right? He had no idea how to do that! And besides... that was... weird.

"Trust me – 16 year old Tom will be very grateful for the skills you're learning right now." The blond chuckled, grabbing Bill's hand and squeezing some gel out of the bottle, onto Bill's fingers. Oh this couldn't be good...

"Tom, don't relax too quickly – we're trying to imitate 2005 here." The blond grinned over at Tom who was watching them with a slightly eager expression.

"I'll try." their twin laughed softly.

"Ok. Now... Tom is going to be very nervous, and we want him to be as relaxed and comfortable with this situation as possible, so first we will again suck around on him a little – go ahead." The blond made an inviting gesture for Bill, who was probably far more nervous than the 16 year old Tom would be at this point.

A bit hesitantly, but encouraged by a smile and nod from Tom, Bill leaned over his twin and took him into his mouth again, slowly moving his head up and down along his erection.

"Good." The future Bill said quietly, leaning down to watch exactly what Bill was doing, his face right next to Bill's and his back turned to Tom. "Only once we're sure that Tom is fully aroused, we'll continue by gently massaging him until he relaxes his muscles enough for you to be able to slide into him without causing him great discomfort." He continued with the instructions, but Bill wasn't sure he was ready for that. The mere thought of... just randomly touching his brother there was awkward; couldn't he just give Tom a blow job instead...?

Apparently not, but obviously his older self had noticed his discomfort, and gently guided his hand until his fingers brushed against the puckered flesh of their twin's entrance. With his older hand guiding him, he hesitantly began circling his brother's tight muscles, trying to follow the soft nudges and tugs of the blonde's hand that moved away far too quickly for Bill's comfort, leaving him to deal with this situation on his own.

"I know it's difficult to concentrate on both things simultaneously at first, but once you have a bit more practice you'll be able to do it easily." The older Bill encouraged when Bill removed his mouth from his brother's cock, not being to focus on both. "Let's just concentrate on your hand right now. Move in gentle circles around him, but don't penetrate him yet – we'll get to that once you can feel that his outer muscles relax."

Bill swallowed nervously, tracing the sensitive area with his fingers. "How do I know when he's relaxed though?" He asked awkwardly.

"Tom?" The blond turned his head a bit to look over at their twin, and Bill immediately felt the muscles soften and relax under his touch.

"Oh, right..." That was indeed a very obvious difference. "He can just do that at will...?" Bill asked amazed.

"Now he can, but... that takes some practice. At first it's very difficult to relax for some people – us more so than for Tom, at the beginning – but after a while you get used to it and can do it pretty much at will." The future Bill nodded.

Bill also nodded, continuing to gently stroke Tom a bit more, despite him being fully relaxed already; Bill just didn't know how to proceed, and really hoped his older self would tell him what to do next. Of course he knew, in theory, what the next step was, but... he couldn't just stick his fingers into... right?

"Of course the Tom from the past will have a much harder time to relax, and you can really help him with your mouth a bit." The blond reminded him, giving Tom's cock a soft, amused poke, causing it to twitch in response.

Bill giggled a bit as Tom chuckled, and tried to lick around on his brother at the same time as he stroked him; it was actually quite a difficult multitask, and Bill was really glad he got to practice this before doing it on a younger, much less experienced Tom.

"Is he relaxed?" The blond asked quietly next to Bill's face, still keeping a close eye on what Bill was doing.

"Mhm," Bill nodded, his mouth too full to talk.

"Excellent." The blond smiled; "Then let's continue. Make sure that you still have enough lube so that it'll be as easy as possible on him – let's not forget that most lubricants are water-based, and dry up after a while, so if it takes too long before you enter him, make sure to use some more first. But for now we should be good." He nodded encouragingly. "Now slowly slide one finger into him - but very slowly so he can adjust, and not too deep."

Bill took a slightly shaky breath, and then very slowly pushed against his brother's opening; there was a bit of a resistance, but not too much, and he slowly let his finger slide into his brother's hot, tight passage; how in god's name was someone's cock supposed to fit in there? It was way too tight...

"Alright, now stop," The blond said softly. "Give him time to relax a bit before moving again. Let's not forget that this is going to be the first time Tom has anything inside him, and we want to give him time to adjust."

Bill nodded, lowering his head to take his brother into his mouth again to help him relax.

"I knew I was a quick learner." The blond smirked, causing Bill to blush a bit.

"Once Tom is more relaxed again, you can go inside a bit deeper. But slowly and only as long as he remains comfortable. If he tenses up, stop immediately and give him more time" The blond ordered softly, and Bill proceeded to push into his brother a little deeper, who immediately tensed up.

"S-sorry!" Bill muttered, pulling to give Tom an apologetic look; "Did I hurt you?" He asked concerned.

"Not at all, I was just making sure you knew what Bill meant with 'tense up'." Tom smiled gently before his smile turned into a playful grin; "Don't worry about hurting me right now – I'm used to a different size already." He smirked naughtily at the older Bill who gave a throaty laugh, giving their twin's cock a playful nip with his teeth.

"Ah! Bill!" Tom laughed, slapping his hand against the blonde's ass with a loud smack.

The blond giggled while Bill's thoughts went back to the whole spanking discussion he had once had with Tom; did his older self like that...? Apparently he hadn't minded the little slap just now, but... did that really mean he enjoyed being-?

"Is he relaxed?" The blond asked, obviously not dwelling on the moment at all.

"Oh, um... yes, I think so?" Bill muttered slowly, looking up at Tom who smiled and nodded.

"Good. Then slowly begin to move, but don't retrieve your hand fully. At first you want to remain inside him, because the actual 'in and out' is the most uncomfortable part at first – later it's the best part – but at the beginning we just want to stay inside him for a bit so he will get used to the sensation."

Bill nodded, like always, and made sure not to exit his brother fully while he slowly slid his finger deeper into him before pulling back a bit again. Bill wasn't entirely sure, but Tom seemed to make a rather relaxed impression, and allowed him to slide easily into him without much resistance. It would probably be different with the younger Tom though, right?

"I know that this might not seem like a big deal, but it actually makes a really huge difference at first. And you may want to do this a few times before you guys actually have anal, ok?" The blond said quietly next to Bill's head. "The more often you do this, the better the first time will be for him. And make sure he returns that favor for us because we have slight difficulties relaxing – tell him that, and don't ever be too shy to let him know what you are and aren't comfortable with, ok?" The blond encouraged him; "My first time was rather painful, but you can easily spare yourself that if you make sure he prepares you right for it. Just keep in mind that this is also something Tom has never done before, and by now you know a lot more about it than he does; Tom loves you and just wants it to be good for you – he just doesn't know how to do that yet, so you'll have to teach him a bit."

Great, Bill thought drily – he was supposed to teach Tom something about sex? Well that would be interesting... Would Tom even listen to anything Bill said in relation to sex?   
Every time when Bill had attempted to tell his twin something about sex, Tom laughed in his face and called him an idiot – _'As if you would know that, virgin!'_ Bill could hear his younger twin's voice ringing in his ears.

"If he's able to relax well around you, try to get out of him and then back in, but gently; that's always uncomfortable at first, but once he relaxes around it, he'll be able to enjoy it." The blond carried on with his instructions, and Bill did as he was told, slowing removing his finger from his brother's warm insides, and then slowly pushing back into him again.

"At first, you will want to do this very slowly, but once he gets more used to it you can speed it up a little – just keep in mind that it takes time, like everything. Don't rush it – you've got at least ten years ahead." The future Bill grinned. "When you're a bit more experienced, it'll be easy to tell how ready he is and how fast he's comfortable with." The blond nodded reassuringly, and then reached for the bottle of lube again.

"Once Tom is comfortable with this – that may take a few times during which you just want to give him a blow-job – we can proceed with increasing the pressure a bit and adding another finger, but make sure he's fully relaxed first. By the time Tom could actually relax enough for it to be good for him, we'd been having sex for a few months already, though I'm sure you can speed that up if you move a bit slower at the beginning. It's also a mental thing: if you already know it's going to hurt, it's very hard to relax, so we don't want it to get to that." The older Bill carried on and held the bottle of lube for Bill to take some more with which he coated his fingers again; would Tom really be comfortable with that...?

 

 

 


	26. Chapter 26

"Once you're outside of him, don't immediately put two fingers inside of him – first make sure he's comfortable with just one again, and while you have one finger inside him, slowly add the other one." The blond instructed, and Bill followed to the letter.

"Just like earlier, you want to stop if he tenses up, and give him time to adjust again." The future Bill reminded.

"I think he's very relaxed...?" Bill said slowly, easily sliding his fingers in and out of his brother.

The older Bill gave Tom a look; "You're not supposed to relax that quickly, you know." he said with a playful scorn.

Tom cleared his throat with a chuckle. "Yeah, I'm sorry... I'm just very ready here."

The blond gave an amused gasp; "Are you now? Why is that, Tom? Do you have a dirty fantasy in which you can have your wicked way with two of me?" he asked with a naughty smirk.

"Actually up until Bill got here, I really didn't, but yes... Now I really do have that." Tom admitted with a low laugh. "And the pace you guys are moving at is absolute torture. Just so you know."

Bill laughed along with his older self who crawled up to Tom's face and kissed him passionately.

"I'm sorry. But it's for your own good." He grinned as he kissed Tom's nose.

"Yeaahh," Tom groaned, taking a few deep breaths while the blond Bill laughed and returned to Bill's side; it was only now as his older self moved away, that Bill noticed how turned on he was. Bill himself was way too busy being nervous and concentrating on what he was doing as to be aroused right now, so he hadn't actually thought about how his older self was feeling about this entire situation, and since the blond was always crouching beside him, Bill hadn't had a view of his... personal parts until now. But of course that made sense – they were supposed to be having sex soon... ‘ _Oh gosh.’_

"Let's not torture poor Tommy for much longer – is he all relaxed? I mean I know he is, but... Can you feel the difference?" The blond chuckled.

"I think so..." Bill nodded; "Feels very relaxed." He confirmed.

"Perfect." His future self smiled, beginning to lubricate himself.

Bill watched in fascination as his future version coated himself with the transparent substance; obviously Bill would still grow a little in that department... He almost felt sorry for Tom who had to take that – was that actually good...?

"If in any way possible, try to keep one hand on Tom while you're preparing yourself, especially at first because sometimes it's very easy to lose your relaxed state as soon as someone is outside of you for a while. So if you do need both hands for a while, make sure to relax him a bit again first." The blond Bill suggested, crawling up to Tom's head again to kiss him.

Tom's breathing was a bit erratic already, and they soon broke the kiss. "I think it would be better if you were on top the first time, right?" The blond asked his twin, who nodded.

Bill was really confused; hadn't he been preparing Tom to... bottom?

"Bill, come over here," his older self waved him over again. "The first time you might want to let Tom ride you because that way he can move at his own pace, and stop as soon as he's not comfortable." The blond said while he lay down in the spot from which Tom had just moved.

Tom sat astride his twin, leaning forward to kiss as he stroked him until his breathing increased while Bill's older self slid two fingers in and out of his brother in the same rhythm that Tom stroked him.   
The scene only lasted for a few seconds, after which Tom sat up again and Bill removed his fingers before Tom slowly lowered himself.

Bill watched in total fascination as Tom lowered himself fully onto his brother, causing them both to moan a bit, and then slowly began rolling his hips. The blonde's left hand gripped Tom's waist while his other stroked his erection in rhythm with Tom's movements. Apparently Tom had no concrete place to put his hands, because occasionally they would caress over the blonde's body, or he would run it through his hair.

They moved slowly and evenly, grinding their bodies together and breathing heavily; all the while Bill just sat there next to them, watching as they bodies moved in what seemed like a perfect synchronization. Under their skin that was slowly beginning to sweat, he could see the muscles flexing rhythmically with their movements each time they repeated the same action.

Boldly, Bill let his eyes roam over Tom's body, burning the image into his mind. Of course Bill had seen various porn movies and the likes, but it could in no way be compared to watching this; not only because it was himself and Tom in ten years, but also because it was just so much more erotic for reasons he couldn't explain, and he was dying to try it out himself.

Tom's lips were slightly parted, his eyes nearly closed and his head tilted a bit back; he looked exactly the way he always did when he was consumed by something – whether this was a song they were playing together, or sex, apparently made no difference. Bill had seen Tom like that countless times, but never had he considered it to be sexual. Great… now he would think about it during every bloody concert… Damn Tom for being so hot.

With an almost inaudible moan, Tom opened his eyes a bit, locking them with Bill; now that was a look he had never witnessed in his brother before. His eyes were clouded with lust, and he stared at Bill so intently it made him shiver.

Gently, Tom reached over to caress Bill's cheek, and then brushed his thumb over his lips. A bit hesitantly, Bill went from his sitting position to a kneeling one and looked back at his future self who was watching them with a similarly intense look.

The blond gave him an affirmative nod while he licked his lips, and Bill slowly leaned over to kiss Tom whose hand was twisting into his hair and pulling him closer. Tom's mouth and lips were a bit dry from his erratic breathing, and he slowed his movements down, hungrily returning the indecisive kiss Bill had initiated.

Tom gently held Bill's face as they kissed for a few moments, before Bill slowly broke the kiss in order to lick down Tom's chest, past his stomach to his erection that Bill's older self was stroking. Tentatively he glanced over at himself, and with a grin, the future Bill released Tom so Bill could take over.

Gingerly, he wrapped his hand around his brother to steady him before taking him into his mouth, eliciting a loud moan from him. Just like he had learned, he slowly let his twin glide in and out of his mouth, occasionally twirling his tongue around him, or sucking lightly.

Apparently Tom was indecisive about which way to move, because eventually he settled for not moving at all, and just moaned deliriously, while one Bill thrust into him and the other sucked on him.

“Oh god, Bill,” Tom groaned, letting his head roll back, but not clarifying which Bill he was talking to.

It really didn't matter to Bill, and he eagerly continued to lick around on his twin, testing out everything he had learned so far. Tom tasted like pre cum, and Bill licked over the slit on his head, trying to coax more liquid out of him; now that he was more confident in what he was doing, the whole situation also began to be quite arousing, and he lost all earlier inhibitions.

“Wait, Bill,” Tom moaned after a few minutes, grabbing a handful of Bill’s mane and dragging up to his face for a short, breathless kiss.

“What?” Bill mumbled distractedly against his older twin’s lips.

“I’m going to cum in a second – especially if you continue like that.” Tom smirked weakly, kissing him again while the older Bill chuckled somewhere.

“I knew I was a quick learner.” The blond commented, also a bit breathlessly, and thrust into his brother a bit harder, making Tom gasp.

Bill gave his older self an uncertain glance, and the blond gestured towards Tom’s abandoned erection with a suggestive grin.

With a soft nod, Bill returned to his earlier ministrations, carefully sucking around on their twin so he wouldn’t cum too quickly.

“Okay, so just keep the touches light,” the blond commented, a bit distracted due to his own pleasure. “And then you either have to choice to move away when Tom cums – which he’ll warn you of.” The future Bill glanced up at Tom whose eyes were closed as he moaned quietly, not really taking part in their conversation. “Right Tom?” The blond demanded with a grin, pushing harshly into him.

“Yes!” Tom groaned loudly, though Bill wasn’t sure he’d been answering the question.

“Or,” the blond Bill continued, “You can swallow, but don’t choke on it. When he comes, try not to have him too deep in your mouth because if he comes in your throat, it’ll probably make you gag at first. After a while you’ll be able to feel when he’s about to cum, so don’t worry about timing – happens automatically after a while.” The future Bill talked slowly in between shuddered breaths.

Bill decided to go with the second option, and returned to his twin’s wet erection which he took back into his mouth in one smooth motion that caused Tom to give a sharp gasp. He continued like earlier, trying to go in rhythm with his older self’s movements, though he made sure not to suck too hard so his brother wouldn’t be oversensitive, and then tested out the best position in which he was able to swallow – something a lot easier said than done with Tom’s cock in his mouth.

While Bill had been totally focused on pleasuring Tom, he suddenly felt someone’s hand sneaking up his body to gently stroke his own erection, nearly causing him to groan; despite having cum earlier, he was completely aroused again, and the soft touch was heaven against his neglected flesh. Who was that? Tom? Bill?   
Bill had no idea, but at that moment he didn’t really care; his eyes were closed and he tried to concentrate on the suddenly utterly complicated task of sucking his twin. How was one supposed to concentrate like this?!

“If you do decide to swallow… Once he cums, slowly decrease the speed until he’s fully done.” The future Bill instructed, and Bill nodded again, moaning around his twin’s erection; that damn hand around his cock was driving him nuts.

It was just a few intense moments later, that Tom gripped his shoulder with a wanton moan. “Bill, I’m going to…”

Bill gave an affirmative moan as the hand on his erection intensified its stroking, and a moment later, salty liquid covered his tongue while both his twins moaned, almost identically. Tom’s erection throbbed rhythmically in his mouth, a bit different than it had before, while Bill tried to catch up on swallowing the viscous liquid that came in a few waves.

Apparently Tom was done at some point, because he slowly pulled Bill’s head up towards him to kiss him between heavy breaths. Apparently it was his future self who was pleasuring him; he hadn’t stopped despite both his older twins apparently being done. Bill was really confused and unfocused due to his older hand, and barely able to concentrate on the kiss.

With a quiet moan, Tom pulled away, getting off his brother before grabbing Bill and pulling him down on the carpet to lay next to their blond twin who was also breathing heavily; Bill was lying somewhere half on top, between them, still able to taste Tom’s essence in his mouth. Up until recently, he had always considered that to be something really gross and had made sure to always wash himself right after jerking off, but somehow Tom’s didn’t bother him at all.

“I think they should invent time travel,” Tom mumbled randomly.

The future Bill laughed incoherently. “So you can have sex with me in the past and the present?”

“And the future as well.” Tom nodded lazily.

Bill also laughed a bit, though it turned into a gasp as suddenly Tom’s hand returned to his erection.

“Hm, Bill, I think we still need to take care of Bill here.” He said wickedly at the blond who turned his head to look at Bill with a smirk.

“Of course we will.”

 

 


	27. Chapter 27

Over the next few days, Bill learned everything that Tom appreciated in bed while the deadline to his stay slowly drew nearer. The longer he stayed, the less he wanted to leave; not just because he was crazy in love with Tom, but also because he really liked his future self – maybe not in such a sexual way, but… Okay, maybe also a bit in the sexual way, just not so much in the romantic way. For some unknown reasons, the relationship between him and himself had remained purely platonic and sexual… Which was a very odd combination.   
However, for the Tom waiting for him in the past, he had no feelings other than brotherly ones, and he couldn’t ever imagine him turning into the Tom that existed now; it just didn’t seem possible because they were far too different. Both Tom and the future Bill always assured him that it would be so, but Bill would still much rather stay in the future.

 

“So what do you guys think will happen?” Bill asked absently, staring at his dinner.

“About what?” His older self asked confused.

“About me… I’m supposed to go home today or tomorrow or something, right?” It was the 23rd of September – he was meant to wake up tomorrow…  Ten years ago tomorrow. In a world where neither of these twins existed… Only a whoring jerk who treated him carelessly, like most brothers treated each other.

“Oh yes, of course. Well… No idea really.” The future Bill mused slowly, looking over at Tom who shrugged.

“I don’t know either.”

“Maybe nothing will happen and I can stay here forever.” Bill mumbled.

“Probably not.” Tom shook his head, taking a few bites from his vegetarian pita. Bill was almost used to vegetarian food already… Maybe he’ll talk to Tom about it once he got back home… Wait what?!

“I don’t want to go home though!” Bill insisted miserably.

“Come on, Bill.” His future self smiled softly, “We’ve talked about this a million times. It’s going to be great.”

“Not as great as it’s here…” Bill sniffed sadly, poking around his food; he wasn’t hungry - he was nervous and miserable.

 

After a rather despondent dinner, they all cuddled up on the couch to wait for whatever would happen, while they lazily conversed of random, irrelevant things. Occasionally one of the twins came up with another small piece of advice they wanted him to have – half of which Bill had intention to ever follow. Like not drinking and smoking too much… Exercising and eating healthy… And a bunch of other lame stuff that sounded as if it were coming from his grandmother.

“I’m going to miss you so much,” Bill whispered at Tom once the future Bill had disappeared to the bathroom, giving them a few moments of privacy.

“I’m waiting for you in the past, Bill,” Tom reminded him gently, tightening the arm around him a bit.

“That’s not true… I’m not going to see you again for another 10 years or something.” Bill whined sadly.

“That’s entirely up to you. You’re the one who turned me from the person I was, to the one I am right now. Without you, I would still behave exactly the way I did ten years ago.” Tom said softly, cupping his cheek and pulling him into a tender kiss.

“I hate you ten years ago,” Bill mumbled into the kiss, receiving a soft chuckle from his twin.

“I know. I hated myself too.” Tom agreed.

“I didn’t hate you.” The older Bill announced as he suddenly came back, dropping down on the couch with them. “I just wasn’t as crazy about as I am now.” He grinned at his twin.

“I still don’t understand why you would ever fall for the Tom in the past.” Bill snorted drily.

“I guess all the romantic awesome stuff he told me while I was in a coma convinced me that he was, in fact, exactly the way he is now, and I totally fell for that.” The blond smiled fondly. “Something you should also realize. Seriously, you’ve been here for so long, how can you still not believe it?”

“I believe it now! I just don’t believe it back then,” Bill said dully.

“You will.” His future self said determined, and Bill nodded; there wasn’t much he could say anyway.

  
And so, they sat around for hours, until Bill finally drifted off to sleep at around 4 am; obviously nothing was happening anyway.

  
~*~

Tom yawned, rubbing his sleep-crusted eyes as he stalked out of the bathroom to go back to his bed next to Bill’s. A quick glance at the clock told him it was barely past six – an hour at which he would usually never be up willingly, but his sleeping routine had been completely messed up in the past few weeks, since he did nothing other than lie next to his brother and wait for a sign of life from him.

The past few weeks had been so exhausting, he felt ten years older. Despite sleeping most of the time, he felt utterly exhausted and just wanted to fall back asleep so he wouldn’t have to deal with reality.

With a heavy sigh, he lay back down next to his comatose brother, and took his hand again, lacing their fingers; a few weeks ago he had still been to shy and awkward to do so, but now he didn’t care anymore. He didn’t even care when someone walked in and saw it; they could think anything they wanted.

Just as Tom was about to drift back into sleep, the hand around his suddenly tightened; something that hadn’t ever happened before. Wide awake, he sat upright to stare at his twin.

“Bill?” He whispered desperately, squeezing his hand. “Can you hear me?”

For a few long seconds there was nothing, but then he suddenly frowned a bit and gave an almost inaudible moan.

“Bill?!” Tom said desperately, kneeling next to him on the bed and holding his shoulders.

“Tom?” Bill groaned hoarsely, opening his eyes just a tiny bit.

“Yeah, it’s me.” Tom whispered, at the verge of tears.

Bill groaned, apparently in pain, and turned his head away. “Tom,” He mumbled again. “No. I want to go home.” He groaned.

“We’re in the hospital, Bill. You had an accident.” Tom explained in the calmest voice he could muster; should he call a nurse? But he really didn’t want to… He wanted a few more moments with Bill alone…

Bill just groaned again, and then there was nothing as he fell back unconscious.

“Nurse!” Tom screamed, running out into the empty hall. “Nurse!”

A moment later, she came out of the nurse’s room, looking alarmed. “What’s the matter?”

“My brother just woke up but now he’s gone again!” Tom grabbed her hand and dragged her into Bill’s room.

“That’s great news.” She said rather passively, looking over Bill’s vital signs.

“He’s gone again though!” Tom said desperately.

“That’s perfectly normal, Mr. Kaulitz. When a person awakes from a longer coma, they never just wake up and are ready to go – it takes a few days for them to be fully awake.” She explained calmly. “This is very good news, and we’ll keep a close eye on him, as always. When he wakes up again, remain calm and explain where he is and what happened to him. It’s best for him not to be agitated.”

“Right…” Tom said slowly as the nurse walked away again, scribbling something on her clipboard. Well that had been very unspectacular…

 

~*~

With a loud gasp, Bill jumped up, falling off the bed with a loud yelp, and startling Pumba who wadded away, looking alarmed.

“No,” Bill muttered confused, looking around the semi darkness.

“Bill?” Tom asked sleepily. “What’s wrong?”

“Tom!” Bill whispered desperately, crawling on the couch again and into his brother’s arms. “It was awful. I woke up in the past… And you were there and…and you were 16…” he muttered quietly, at the verge of tears. “I don’t want to go back.”

“It’ll be okay, Bill, I promise,” Tom soothed, but Bill just shook his head.

“I want to stay here with you.” As much as he tried, he couldn’t keep a steady voice.

“Guys, what’s going on?” the older Bill asked with a yawn, rubbish his eyes. “What time is it?”

“I think you just woke up for the first time.” Tom informed the sleepy Bill.

“Oh… Bill, I’m really sorry.” His future self crawled over to them to give him a hug, but even that couldn’t comfort Bill right now; he was completely devastated and began soon began to sob quietly.

“It’s not fair… I don’t want to leave,” He whispered into Tom’s neck, holding on to him as tight as he could.

Neither of his twins could comfort him, so they just sat there while Bill cried and Tom held him until the sun began to come up.

“Bill?” His older self finally whispered. “We’ve all been up the whole night… Sooner or later we’ll end up falling asleep, and you’ll probably be gone…”

“No! I don’t want to fall asleep!” Bill refused vehemently, despite being completely exhausted.

“Oh Bill,” his older self said sadly, wrapping his arms around him and kissing him softly. “We knew you had to leave at some point…”

Bill sniffed quietly, knowing he was right. “I know but…”

“It’ll be okay. Tom is right there waiting for you.” The blond encouraged with a smile.

“What about you?” Bill asked stupidly. “I’m going to miss you so much…”

“Don’t be silly… You can’t miss me – I’m you!” His future self laughed, though Bill could easily see that he would miss him too. “And don’t ever forget that we both love you so very much.” He added with a whisper and a kiss to the tip of his ear.

With a heavy sigh, Bill lay down again, cuddled between his twins, facing Tom and being hugged by his older self who soon fell asleep, unlike Bill and Tom who remained awake as the room slowly grew brighter with the morning sun.

“I’m so tired,” Bill finally whispered, not wanting to wake his older self up.

Tom nodded with a small smile. “Me too. We should get some sleep.”

“But I don’t want to,” Bill shook his head a bit.

“But I’m dying for you to wake up again. I miss you so much in the past…”

Bill wanted to die at his brother’s whispered words. “But I’m going to miss you so much once you’re gone.”

“I’m not going to be gone, Bill, I’m there waiting for you.” Tom smiled softly, caressing his cheek.

Trying not to wake his older self, Bill scooted a little bit closer to kiss his twin again; he felt as if Tom were about to die, and it made him want to die as well. “I can’t live without you.” He whispered against his brother’s lips.

“You don’t have to,” Tom whispered back in between gentle kisses. “We will always be together.”

“In the past, the present and the future as well?” Bill asked with a small smile, reciting what his had said the other day.

“Yes, exactly.”

 

These were the last words Bill heard before falling asleep, only to regain consciousness all too soon again. His body ached dully – especially his head – and he was confused beyond reason; what the hell was going on? He wanted to get up, but felt far too weak to do so.

Painfully, he opened his eyes to squint into the dim light of the blurred room; where was he…?

“Bill.” A familiar voice spoke right next to him, and he tried to focus on the blurry figure in front of his face. It was Tom…

“No,” Bill groaned, closing his eyes; it was the wrong Tom. This couldn’t be happening… He wanted to cry. He felt so weak and drained, and he was terrified; he had just lost the love of his life… And now he was stuck in the past… In his old life…

  
~*~

Over the next few hours, Bill drifted in and out of consciousness, though Tom had the feeling he wasn’t very happy. He kept saying ‘no’, and repeating Tom’s name over and over. Every time he woke up anew, he’d be a little more awake, and every time a little more disgruntled.

“Hey,” Tom said carefully, watching as his brother slowly woke up again, and rubbed his eyes with his hand.

“My head hurts.” Bill mumbled, and Tom increased the dose of morphine that was dripping into his brother’s bloodstream.

“You had a really bad head injury.” Tom explained quietly.

Bill groaned a bit and turned his head to look at him with a sad expression. “I have to pee.” He finally said after a few moments.

“Oh um…” Tom mumbled a bit awkwardly. “Go ahead…”

Bill was about to get up, but Tom pushed him back down. “Don’t get up, are you crazy?” The doctors had said Bill had to stay in bed at least until tomorrow, or even better the day after that.

“You want me to pee the bed?” Bill grumbled, slapping his hands away with stunning strength.

“You’ve been in a coma for over five weeks, Bill. You’re… all set to stay in bed during that…” Tom said awkwardly; wow… worst conversation he’d ever had in his life…

Bill stared at him for a few seconds before screeching. “Gross! I’m getting up!”

“No, wait! Bill!” Tom grabbed his brother’s shoulder and pushed him back into the bed. “You’re really injured, you’re not allowed to get up.”

“Get off me or you’ll be more injured than me!” Bill snarled; he didn’t really look as fragile as the doctors had said he would be.

With a sigh, Tom watched as Bill staggered out of bed and viciously ripped the needle out of his arm; why was Bill in such an awful mood? Tom was delighted that he was alive, but obviously Bill didn’t share his enthusiasm. Maybe that was normal for people waking from comas? But the doctors had said he would be really lethargic for a few days… Bill didn’t look very lethargic…

“Need some help?” He asked passively when Bill nearly fell over as he tried to walk the five feet towards the small bathroom.

“No!” Bill almost yelled, slamming the bathroom door.

“Okay then…” Tom mumbled, mostly to himself.

A moment later, the nurse came in. “What’s all this racket? Oh! Where is Bill?!” She asked in panic.

“He went to the bathroom.” Tom sighed.

“What?! He’s not allowed to get up!” She said in outrage, knocking loudly on the bathroom door. “Mr. Kaulitz! You need to get back into bed immediately!” She said sternly.

“Go away, I’m trying to pee!” Bill yelled back.

“Mr. Kaulitz!” She said angrily before stomping away. “I’m getting a doctor!”

Tom sighed, not knowing what to do. Somehow he had pictured Bill’s awakening a little more peaceful.

Before the nurse managed to get a doctor, Bill trudged out of the bathroom, fixing his hospital gown and looking extremely upset.

“Are you okay?” Tom asked carefully.

“Awesome.” Bill spat darkly, getting back into his bed and pulling the covers up to his head.

~*~

Maybe he really should have peed in the freaking diaper… He felt as if he were about to pass out from the exertion of the small trip to the bathroom; this whole coma thing absolutely sucked… His head was spinning and he felt like throwing up.

“Bill?” Tom’s voice rang distantly in his ears. “Are you all right?” The voice drifted farther and farther away until he wasn’t able to hear it anymore.

~*~

“What’s going on here?” The doctor who’d been attending Bill showed up with the angry nurse.

Tom shrugged helplessly while the doctor checked Bill over before shaking her head. “Do try to keep him in bed, Tom. He’s very weak and needs his rest.” She said before she left together with the nurse. Obviously neither of them knew Bill or they would know that keeping him from doing something he wanted was practically impossible.

Though Tom remained awake for many more hours, Bill didn’t wake up again, so eventually he also fell asleep, holding his twin’s hand, like every night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas! I hope you're all having nice holidays ^^   
> I'm not going to be updating again this year, so I wish you all a happy new year :3


	28. Chapter 28

Tiredly, Bill looked around the small room that was filled with flowers, balloons, teddy bears and countless fan mail. And there was Tom... lying in a bed next to him, sleeping. And holding his hand...  
Why was he doing that?

Confused and tired, he closed his eyes again, not bothering to retract his hand from Tom's, despite it being sort of weird. Not that Tom had never held his hand before, but not like this... It was a bit awkward...

What was going on anyway? He couldn't remember anything... The accident on stage... And then going to the future where he had fallen in love with Tom...

"Ew." Bill mumbled quietly. That was ridiculous... There was no such thing as time travel... What was wrong with him, imagining crap like that?! Bill felt himself blush as he looked at his brother; why in the world had he imagined all those things? With Tom?! Gross!!

But the memories were so... vivid. At first they had been blurry, but the more he thought about them, the more he remembered. He remembered all those hot, passionate kisses with... Tom. His own twin...

'Oh god, I need therapy...' Bill turned his humiliated face away from his sleeping brother; what in the world had that been about?! Did he have some sick, subconscious desire to be with his own twin?

Trying to determine his feelings, he turned back to look at Tom; alright, so maybe there was something sexy about him, but... he was a total whore! He was disgusting and not at all what Bill wanted; he wanted... the Tom from the future... The one from his fantasies... The one who had been so perfect. So tender and loving... So mature and understanding... So completely different from the real Tom.

"Stupid idiot," Bill mumbled, not sure whether he was referring to himself for thinking these things, or to Tom for being the way he was.

"What?" Tom mumbled, opening his eyes a bit and blinking sleepily at him.

"What?" Bill asked innocently.

"Hey." Tom smiled feebly. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I was hit by a giant lighting set," Bill said dully. "And then run over by a train. And then hit by a truck."

Tom raised an eyebrow, looking both amused and worried. "Should I get a doctor?"

"God no. Spare me that crap..." Bill grumbled darkly; his throat ached horribly but he tried not to show it. "How long was I out?" He felt so weak... And tired. And as if he really had been run over by a truck and then a train...

"A little over five weeks," Tom said quietly.

Just like the future Bill had said... "What were you doing all that time?" According to the future Tom, he'd been sitting by his side all the time... Somehow Bill was currently unable to tell reality and fantasy apart.

Tom shrugged. "Since the tour was cancelled, I finally had time again to bang some chicks." He grinned wickedly.

Bill wanted to punch him in the face. Stupid Tom... And stupid Bill for having imagined that in ten years his brother would be different... How would he ever deal with his feelings? He was crazy about a man who didn't even exist – who had never existed and never would... He was in love with his own comatose fantasy... That included his own twin brother...

"You don't have to stay here the whole time. If you want to fuck around, go right ahead – I won't stop you." Bill said coldly, turning his back to his brother. Maybe he really should seek out a therapist. Or maybe it was just the side effect of the drugs... Yes, that was probably it. Surely it would wear off soon, right? Yes. Of course it would. Soon it would be nothing but a distant nightmare.

~*~

Tom almost cringed at the words and had to remember the pathetic promise he had made about telling his brother how he felt about him, should he ever wake up again... But of course that was something he could never do, so he just carried on as normal, despite hating it.

"Are you sure? I can also stay here if you really want me to." It's not like he could just walk out, right? What kind of a brother would do that?

"Yes, go away. I want to sleep and your snoring is bother me," Bill complained sourly.

"Since when do I snore?" Tom whined, crossing his arms; was Bill just being a jerk because of the meds? Or had Tom seriously just started snoring? No way...

"Since always. Go away. My head hurts." Bill kept his eyes closed and buried his face deeper in the pillows.

"Alright, if you're sure. I'll see you later then," He said casually, getting up; he didn't want to leave at all, but what excuse did he have to stay if Bill wanted him gone? Bill was feeling better, and also rather cranky, so what was he supposed to do? It would be weird if he insisted on staying here rather than going out to screw someone, right? Or at least take a shower and eat something...   
Besides, he hadn't actually gotten laid in almost six weeks, and really wanted some, so maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea... Now that he wasn't fearing for Bill's life any longer, he could concentrate on other needs. Maybe it would help him forget all this... He wanted to get drunk and screw around so he wouldn't have to think about the promise he didn't intend to keep. And now that Bill was awake, he suddenly felt awkward around him. It was horrible.

~*~

Bill couldn't believe his brother had actually taken him up on that and left; the Tom from his coma fantasy would have never done that... He would have told him that he didn't want anyone other than him and stayed by his side until he could finally leave this horrible hospital... But of course the real Tom didn't care and just abandoned him here to get a few nameless girls into his bed. Bill wanted to cry; he hated reality.   
Before he had fallen into a coma, it hadn't really bothered him because he had never looked at his brother in that way (obviously), but now it was impossible not to hate him for being himself instead of the amazing 26-year-old Tom that Bill was still crazy about. Hopefully it would wear off soon... Dreams sometimes also took a while before they left him alone.

But that didn't happen. Two weeks later, Bill was finally able to leave the hospital and return home with his parents and Tom, whom he still hated.   
He tried not to show it to him, but it was difficult when Tom bragged about his sexual encounters to Georg and Gustav. Why did he have to do that? Why couldn't he just shut up and die? Stupid Tom...

~*~

With a frown, Tom watched Bill stalking out of the living room and up the stairs where he slammed the door to his room.

"What's up with Bill lately?" Georg asked confused. "Ever since he woke up, he's been amazingly cranky."

"I don't know either..." Tom shook his head; he was really worried about Bill, but didn't know how to approach the subject because deep, meaningful conversations really weren't his thing.

"Have you tried talking to him? Maybe it's some kind of post-traumatic coma disorder or something," Gustav mused slowly.

"No... What am I supposed to say?" Tom asked stupidly; he didn't want to confront Bill; confronting Bill was always difficult because Bill was touchy and sensitive and if Tom said something wrong he got really upset, and Tom hated seeing him upset... Mostly because he wanted to comfort him right away, but didn't really dare because he was unsure where the line was. Whenever things got too intimate, he was afraid to cross the 'brother line' and step into something that Bill would consider weird. And it was far worse since the accident, because Tom had spent all those weeks coming to terms with feelings that he had always tried to ignore, and now it was almost impossible to be close to Bill; it had always been torture, but now it was becoming unbearable, and more often than not, he found himself saying things he knew would upset Bill and drive him away, simply because he was scared of even being in the same room with him.

That, and it had totally screwed with his sex life. Ever since that retarded promise, he was suffering from 'performance anxiety', which had led to some seriously humiliating evenings already, so at this point he had decided to put that part of his life on hiatus. Sex had to wait until his problems with Bill were solved.  
A small part of him wished Bill would have heard everything he had said, but then he would probably be really...

"Oh my god." Tom said loudly, causing both others to look at him in alarm.

"What?" Georg asked concerned.

"I think I know what's wrong with Bill. I'll see you guys tomorrow or something." Tom excused himself, forming all sorts of horrid thoughts in his mind. What if Bill really had heard what he'd said? Could that be why he was so upset and angry at him? Had Tom's ultimate fears suddenly become reality, and Bill now hated him for the way he felt?

In panic, Tom stumbled up the stairs and knocked loudly on his twin's door. "Bill? Can I come in?" He opened the door before Bill had a chance to answer.

"What?" Bill asked with an annoyed sigh. He was sitting on his bed, listening to music and flipping through all the magazine articles about them that he had missed over the past few weeks.

"I think we should talk." Tom said meekly, closing the door and stepping a bit further into his brother's room.

"About what?" Bill asked annoyed, not looking up from the magazines.

"About why you're so upset with me ever since you woke up."

"I'm not," Bill huffed, obviously very upset.

Maybe this was useless... Maybe he should just pretend nothing was wrong and go away again... But he hated how things were between them... But he was really good at ignoring things, so maybe he should go with that... But he really didn't want to... Great.

"I know you are..." He said slowly; he wanted to talk about it... He needed to make him understand that... that what? That he wasn't actually expecting anything from him? Of course he wasn't – they were twins, for heaven's sakes...

"So what do you care?" Bill snapped angrily, tossing the magazine aside and crossing his arms.

"What is that supposed to mean? You know I care about you." That was okay to say, right? Bill knew that he cared about him as a brother...

"Yeah, so much that while I was in a bloody coma, you were out whoring around like the typical slut you are!" Bill said furiously, turning his head away to glare out the window.

Tom stared at him in confusion. "Since when do you care whom I sleep with...?" It was common knowledge that Bill didn't agree with his lifestyle, but he had never really been upset about it; sure he complained about it all the time, but they had never actually fought over it.

"I don't. You can do whatever the hell you want," Bill snapped, getting off the bed and stalking out of the room, slamming the door in Tom's face. What the hell had that been about?!

~*~

Agitated, Bill ran down the stairs to avoid facing Tom; it wasn't Tom's fault that he suddenly viewed him as something other than a brother... And it was unfair to expect him to become Bill's fantasy. Not only because it was totally sick and twisted, but also because Tom was a completely different person who was incapable of feeling the way Bill did. Or the way the older Tom from Bill's fantasies felt... The fantasy that had seemed so real... But it couldn't be because things like that were impossible.

"Wait! Bill!" Tom called after him, jumping down the stairs to catch up with him.

"What?" Bill sighed in defeat.

"What's going on? Why are you so upset?" There was an unusual urgency in Tom's voice, though Bill wasn't sure how to interpret it.

"I'm sorry... I'm just sort of tired... I keep getting these headaches and the pills I got from the doctor aren't really helping... Mood swings are a side effect of those meds though, so maybe that's what's wrong with me. But really, it's nothing. I'm sorry," he said again. There was no way he could keep doing this; this wasn't Tom's fault... Being angry at him wouldn't get either of them anywhere. "I'm sure I'll get better soon." Or at least he really hoped that.

Tom looked a bit hesitant but then nodded. "Alright, well... If there's anything I can do, let me know, ok?" He said with a gentle smile that almost made him look like... Tom. Bill swallowed, nodding.

"Yeah, thanks."

And then Tom walked away again, leaving him abandoned and miserable.

~*~

Once Tom was finally in his room again, he closed the door with a shaky sigh and locked it; Bill had been lying. He knew it. He always knew when Bill was lying, and right now he was definitely lying. Did that mean he knew but didn't want to talk about it?   
Obviously he didn't want to talk about it... Tom didn't want to talk about it either... But what would happen now? Would they just be awkward around each other forever?   
'Oh god, what have I done?'


	29. Chapter 29

It was only a few weeks after Bill left the hospital that they resumed their Tokio Hotel life – far too soon in Bill's opinion, especially because he was still completely caught up on the thing with Tom. Though after that argument they had become more civil towards each other, Bill tried to avoid him and every smile directed at him was fake – something he knew Tom noticed but never commented on. The fact that they knew each other so well was maddening, because they both knew there was something wrong, and both knew they were avoiding it and just pretending it was fine.  
Bill felt as if Tom could see right through him, knowing with just one glance that nothing was alright, and sometimes Bill wished Tom would address the subject, but he never did.

They had a ton of work to catch up on, and seven cancelled shows they needed to reschedule, though they were still waiting with that because Bill wasn't feeling well enough for a live performance yet; his headaches still showed up randomly, especially with loud music, so they tried to stick to rehearsing, promoting and the millions of interviews in which Bill had to tell his story over and over to the point that he wanted to slap the reporters asking him. Seriously, couldn't they just read it from a different magazine that printed the same story?! It was so annoying.

Exhausted, Bill shut the door to his room in the apartment in Berlin that belonged to them again instead of that cranky Mrs. Wasner from Bill's fantasy. However, his peace didn't last long because a moment later his phone rang; it was David.

"Hey, what's up?" Bill tried to sound cheerful as he picked up, even though he wanted to whine in misery.

"I got interesting news for you!" David said excited. "I just got a call from the FFS Berlin!"

"Who?" Bill asked confused.

"The Berlin movie and TV dubbing company. They want you to dub a character in a movie – you always said you wanted to do something like that – remember when we talked to them last year?" David carried on excitedly.

"Oh... Yes," Bill said dumbfounded; he had completely forgotten about that already.

"Anyway, it's a movie called Arthur and the-"

"What?!" Bill shrieked loudly. Arthur and the Minimoys! The Bill from the future had told him about that... No way... That couldn't be true.

"Minimoys," David continued slowly. "What?"

"Who's playing the female lead?" Bill asked shakily.

"You'll never guess!" David said brightly.

"Nena," Bill muttered in disbelief.

"Oh. Yes. How did you know?" David laughed. "So do I confirm?"

"Um... Yeah, sure..." Bill mumbled, trying to place his thoughts back in order. This couldn't be true... If that movie really existed... And he and Nena would dub it into German... What did that mean?

David said a few other things but Bill wasn't really paying attention, and then hung up, leaving Bill completely bewildered and confused. What the hell was happening?!

It couldn't be that all of that had actually been true, right? But then how had he known? He had never heard of that movie before – he had believed it had all been part of his overactive imagination...

Hesitantly he turned his computer on – there was one other thing Bill had told him already existed in his time: Twilight. His future self had urged him to check out the book that apparently already existed, though Bill had also never heard of it.

Shakily he typed the name into google, impatiently waiting the two seconds it took the search engine to find something. And indeed there it was... A book he had never heard of outside his own fantasy. But that was crazy... Did that mean... he had actually been in the future...?

Quickly he closed the window and took a deep breath. But if he had been in the future... that meant Tom was... No way.

Bill shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. That was crazy. There was no such thing as time travel... Though back in his memory he had been able to accept it just fine...

No, that was crazy talk. There was no such thing as time travel. He had probably just heard of Twilight somewhere before... And Arthur... Ok that made no sense either.

There was only one way to really prove it, and that was to confront Tom about it. Could it be that Tom really was in love with him already, the way the 26-year-old Tom had claimed...?

The mere thought made Bill's stomach feel funny, and he was suddenly overcome with a strong wave of irrational excitement. Could that truly be? Could his fantasies actually be real? As unrealistic as time travel sounded, the fact that his current brother was supposed to once turn into the amazing Tom from the future, was even less likely to Bill.

But of course he had no other choice – Tom was the only way to figure whether it was true or not... And the only thing that really mattered.

Now all the needed to do was come up with a plan to find out how Tom felt about him... Preferably without Tom noticing it. But how the hell did one go about that?? How do you find out if someone loves you, without asking? Of course in most normal cases there were plenty of signs, but with Tom... Tom acted as normal as ever... And if his fantasies were true, Tom had been in love with him for so long that it was hard to tell what he would act if it weren't so...

Bill spent the next hour or so pacing up and down his room, trying to come up with a plan, until Gustav knocked to ask him what he wanted to order for dinner.

"Um... Something vegetarian," Bill said hesitantly. He had been eating as ever until now, but he wanted to test what it would be like... Maybe he really wanted to be vegetarian...? After all, if the future was real, he would be vegetarian in 10 years... Or a lot sooner. Who knew.

"Are you sure?" Gustav asked surprised.

"Yeah." Bill nodded firmly.

It took another 40 minutes or so before Gustav came back to tell him that their pizza had arrived, and Bill followed him to the living room where Georg and Tom were checking out the different pizzas.

"Eeewwww... Gusti, why did you order vegetarian?" Tom complained loudly, scrunching up his nose in disgust.

"Shut up. It's mine," Bill snapped irritated, ripping the pizza box out of his hands.

Tom stared at him in disbelief. "Why?"

"I like vegetarian food." Bill shrugged.

"Since when?!" Tom asked outraged, grabbing a piece of salami pizza.

"Since now," Bill said pointedly, munching on his piece of veggie pizza.

"Whatever." Tom shook his head, rolling his eyes.

Out of the corner of his eye, Bill saw the Gs exchanging a freaked out glance, but neither said anything.

While they ate, Bill watched his brother closely, trying to determine if there was a chance Tom was secretly in love with him, but there was no sign whatsoever. Tom was acting as normal and relaxed as ever.

~*~

Tom thought his head was about to explore; what the hell was Bill staring at the whole time?! It was driving him insane. He was so nervous his hands were starting to sweat.  
Generally being in Bill's presence had been unnerving lately, but never as badly as right now. Had something happened? Why was Bill acting so weird all of a sudden? Did that have something to do with the vegetarian pizza? Was this some new psycho side effect of the pills? Was Bill even still taking those?

Gustav started talking about something, but Tom couldn't pay attention because he needed to concentrate on not looking over at his brother whose eyes were digging holes into Tom's skull.

The past few weeks had been so exhausting for him – he had been so careful to pretend nothing was going on, it was slowly driving him nuts. And now Bill acting like a crazy person was even worse; he wanted to yell at him and ask what the hell was going on, but obviously he couldn't... Especially with the Gs in the room... But even without them – what was he supposed to say to him?!

"I still need to get some stuff done, I'll be in my room," Tom finally excused himself as casually as possible, grabbing the rest of his salami pizza and disappearing into his room; he didn't miss his twin's penetrating stare following him all the way until he shut the door, finally managing to exhale in peace.

A bit anxious, he left the half eaten pizza on the desk and sat down on his bed with his laptop; he needed to take his mind off Bill. Surely he was just reading too much into it... There was probably nothing going on behind Bill's weird behavior – everyone knew he could be really weird from time to time without any reason whatsoever, and even more so ever since he had woken up from the coma. Soon Bill would go back to normal – or as normal as they had been with each other lately – and then everything would be fine.

But that didn't happen. As a matter of fact, Bill's behavior just got even weirder. He started ordering vegetarian for every meal and watched Tom like a hawk – it drove him crazy. There wasn't a single moment when they were in the same room when Bill wasn't eyeing him suspiciously; what the hell was going on?! He felt as if Bill were expecting something, but he had no idea what. What was Bill waiting for? Was he supposed to do or say something? Was Bill paranoid that he would do something Bill didn't want him to...? Was he waiting for Tom to slip up on his 'twin act' and do something a brother shouldn't do...? Tom had never done something like that – at least not while Bill had been conscious – but under the horrible pressure Bill was putting him with his constant stares, he was getting pretty close to losing his sanity; one of these days he would end up saying something he would regret later, he knew it.

Distressed, Tom ran a hand over his face, trying to concentrate on tuning his guitar instead of Bill's nasty stare from across the room where his brother was supposed to be writing something. He knew he should have done this in his bedroom, not the living room. 'Seriously, Tom. Imbecile...' he thought drily, wanting to punch himself for not having seen this coming.

With a quiet sigh, he finally lifted his head to look over at Bill, expecting this one to look away immediately – the way people usually did if they had been staring at you – but he didn't; he just kept on staring with that expectant look.

"What?" Tom finally asked weakly.

"What what?" Bill asked expectantly.

Tom gave a shaky breath. "What are you looking at the whole time?" He asked exasperatedly.

"Can I not?" Bill raised a challenging eyebrow.

"No! You're freaking me out! Stop it!" Tom snapped annoyed. He couldn't take this anymore; this had been going on for over two weeks and he was at breaking point.

"Or what?" Bill demanded.

Tom stared at him in disbelief. Was he trying to piss him off? "Or nothing. Just stop it," He said dully, not knowing what to say to that. What was wrong with Bill?!

Bill huffed, rolling his eyes. "If you don't like the way I look at you, go away."

Tom couldn't believe they were even having this ridiculous conversation. "I don't just mean now, Bill, I mean all the time." He knew that going to his room wouldn't solve anything because the moment he left it, Bill would work on destroying the little sanity Tom had left.

"Are you in love with me?" Bill suddenly demanded, nearly causing Tom to fall off the couch.

"What?!" He asked in disbelief, unsure he had heard correctly.

"Are you in love with me?" Bill repeated, a bit louder.

This couldn't be happening... Bill knew! But if he knew, why was he asking...? Maybe he wasn't sure... Maybe he had heard Tom, but wasn't sure if it was reality or if he had imagined it... Coma was tricky like that, after all.

He had to lie and say no...  
But this might be his only chance to come clean...  
But then Bill would hate him forever...  
But he would finally be rid of it and they could move on...   
Or could they?

If he told the truth now, would it ruin their relationship forever?


	30. Chapter 30

“What the hell are you talking about, Bill?” Tom asked freaked out; it was impossible to tell whether that was a yes or no.

“I just want to know,” Bill said passively; had he been wrong? Had he truly only imagined the future? But what about Twilight and Arthur? Had he known of those before and just forgotten…? No way… He would never forget about meeting Nena.

“We’re twins. Stop being ridiculous.” Tom laughed, shaking his head and getting up to leave.

“Wait, Tom,” Bill said quietly, getting up as well to stop him; if they didn’t talk about it now, they never would. “What’s going on?”

“About what?” Tom asked a bit annoyed.

“About us… This. What’s wrong with us?” Bill asked desperately; he didn’t want to be wrong… He wanted Tom to be… the Tom he wanted him to be, even though that was totally selfish.

“You tell me!” Tom almost yelled. “You’re the one who’s been insane ever since that accident.”

“You’re the one who’s constantly avoiding me!” Bill shot back, crossing his arms defensively.

“ _I’m_ avoiding _you_?!” Tom asked in disbelief. “You’re the one who doesn’t want to be in the same room as me, much less talk to me!”

“I’m here now, aren’t I?” Bill asked softly.

Tom sighed, running a hand through his dreadlocks and putting the guitar back down on the couch. “I don’t know what you’re expecting from me right now.”

“I just want you to answer me,” Bill said quietly, taking a step closer to his very uncomfortable looking brother.

“I don’t want our relationship to change,” Tom mumbled uncomfortably, looking everywhere but at Bill.

“Really? You like the way it is right now? I for one, hate it,” Bill said drily, smiling a bit as Tom gave him a wary glance.

“Did you hear what I said to you while you were unconscious?” Tom asked quietly, not looking away this time.

“No.” But Bill knew what the older Tom had told him – about having been by his side all the time, pouring his heart out.

“Then why are you asking me this?” Tom asked bitterly.

“Because maybe I did hear it – I just don’t remember it consciously… But ever since I woke up, I can’t shake the feeling that you’ve been lying to me for a very long time.” It’s not like he could tell Tom he had gone to the future…

Tom looked so miserable it nearly made Bill cringe. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled softly, staring down at the floor.

“So it’s true then…” Bill said more to himself than Tom. Everything was true then… Was it also true that Tom would once turn into the man Bill was in love with?

“But that doesn’t mean things suddenly have to be different between us. I have never, and will never, expect anything like that from you… I’m so sorry that I made things so awful between us. I just want us to go back to the way we were before this terrible accident,” Tom pleaded, and Bill swallowed thickly; they would never go back to the way it had once been. And Bill really didn’t want to either.

“I don’t want you to lie to me… I want you to be…” How could he possibly explain that? Was he being unfair to demand that? “I want you to be who you really are, not the idiot you’ve been pretending to be. I want you to just… I know you’re smarter than this. I know you’re more mature and whatever… I know you’re not the careless whore you always make everyone believe you are.” Unless of course he was wrong, and Tom was not at all like the Tom from the future.

“How would you know all that?” Tom asked a bit freaked out.

“Because I know that there’s more to you than this… I was always waiting for you to get there but I have the feeling you’re deliberately being stupid because… because you’re scared of being around me due to how it makes you feel… And that’s why you’ve been acting like a jerk because I’m so close, yet you think so unreachable. And that’s why you always sleep around so much, because for a few hours it lets you forget about me… yet I’m always the one on your mind.” Of course Bill knew he was making nothing but conceited assumptions – those were all the things the future Tom had told him – but at this point he didn’t know what else to say.

~*~

Tom stared at him in disbelief; how the hell did Bill suddenly know all that?! Bill had just described everything he had felt over the years but had never been able to express. Not even while Bill had been unconscious had he been able to say it like.

“How… How could you know that?” He whispered bewildered.

Bill sighed. “I don’t – I’m just guessing.”

“That’s one hell of an accurate guess,” Tom said stunned.

Bill smiled softly. “So I’m right?”

Tom nodded, still overwhelmed with the whole situation. Wait… Why was Bill not freaking out about all this…? “And you… Why are you so okay with this?” He asked suspiciously. It couldn’t be that Bill wouldn’t hate him, right?

“I want you to be yourself around me… The real yourself – not the shit yourself you’ve always been.”

“Um…” Tom mumbled stupidly; he didn’t even know what the real him was. He had been pretending to be the other him for so long he had no idea what the truth was anymore. And besides… “Wait… Bill… What’s going on? Why are we talking about this so casually? Aren’t you angry at me? Or… something?” ‘Disgusted’ was the word on his tongue, but he didn’t want to say it.

“No,” Bill said softly. “I want to get to know you…”

“As what…?” Of course Tom was delighted that Bill wasn’t upset about this, but... what did he want? It couldn’t be that Bill was… in any way returning his feelings, right? The thought made Tom all jittery and he wished he hadn’t asked; it wasn’t a question he wanted answered because he knew the truth would destroy the last silly shred of hope he had left.

“I don’t know…” Bill sounded so uncertain… Did that mean there was a chance he wanted more than just- No, that was impossible. ‘ _Stop being stupid, man_!’ Tom berated himself. There was no way that would ever happen.

“Look, Bill… I just want us to get along again. And I will be anything you want me to be.” It didn’t matter if Bill wanted a brother, friend or lover – Tom would be there for him and be whatever made his twin happy, even if it would mean leading an unhappy life forever; as long as Bill was happy, it was well worth it.

“I also want us to get along… So let’s just… take it slow and get to know each other a bit better? I know that sounds stupid, given we’re twins and all, but still.” Bill laughed a bit and Tom joined him shakily; he was still half convinced this was nothing but a beautiful dream and he was about to wake up to a harsh reality in which Bill would hate him for it.

“Yeah… Let’s take it slow,” Tom agreed, taking a deep, shaky breath.

“Yeah.” Bill nodded.

~*~

Of course Bill had no idea what the hell that meant or how they were going to progress from here, but since Tom sat back down, apparently they would start now.

“So…” Bill said slowly, also sitting back down.

“So…” Tom nodded, looking more awkward than Bill felt.

Bill cleared his throat unnecessarily, not knowing what to say.

“What’s up with the vegetarian food?” Tom asked randomly, picking up his guitar again to continue tuning it.

“I’ve decided to become vegetarian,” Bill said determined – he hadn’t actually made up his mind until that moment.

Tom made a sour face. “Why?”

“Because those poor animals spend their entire life in dark, glory, smelly cages, waiting for the day someone will slaughter them. I don’t want to be part of that…” _‘Oh my god, isn’t that exactly what Tom said to me once?!_ ’ Bill was horrified at his own words. Tom from the future had been right: the whole vegetarian thing had been his idea… Ugh. But that didn’t count because it had been Tom the one who had planted the idea in his head to begin with! So whose fault was it, Bill’s or Tom’s?   
Bill concluded it was like the whole ‘what was first, the egg or the chicken’ question – there was no answer to it.

“Hm…” Tom said slowly. “What about a happy animal? You know, those organic, happy ones that live on farm or something?”

Bill burst out laughing; that had been his text in the future.

“What?” Tom raised an eyebrow at his amusement.

“I suppose it would be ok if we eat happy animals…” He wasn’t ready to become 100% vegetarian… Maybe they could somehow buy some of that ethnic meat? “But if we can’t find any happy ones, I’m not going to eat them anymore,” he added firmly.

Tom gave him a weird sideways glance. “Yeah ok. We could do that…”

“Really?” Bill asked stunned. He had believed Tom would refuse and it would take years to convince him.

“Yeah. I think the ethnic meat thing is a really nice idea. And it would probably also set a good example for our fans and stuff.” Tom nodded with a smile, looking a lot more relaxed than just a few moments ago.

“Yes!” Bill agreed enthusiastically; since when was it so easy to convince Tom of one of his ideas? It had taken forever to convince him to buy Bill’s brand of noodles, and now with such a huge deal, Tom just agreed?

Tom smiled hesitantly, nodding a bit.

“So what was going on while I was out?” Bill continued cheerfully, not wanting an awkward silence to fall between them.

“Nothing at all. Our life was put on hold, all concerts and interviews cancelled… Georg and Gustav went home for those weeks, though they dropped by various times to see how you were doing.” Tom shrugged.

“I thought you were having a great time screwing every girl in sight – since you finally got the time,” Bill said snidely; he knew it wasn’t true and that he was being a total jerk by saying so, but he was still slightly miffed about Tom having said that the moment Bill had awoken.

Tom immediately tensed and gave him such a sad look, Bill almost apologized, feeling like a total asshole.

“I um…” Tom mumbled awkwardly, looking towards the open door to his room, obviously debating whether he should hide in there or not.

“I’m sorry,” Bill said before his twin managed to walk away; Tom looked even more uncomfortable. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Bill sighed; why wasn’t he able to talk to Tom the way he had done with the older Tom?

Tom said nothing, just stared down at his guitar which he still hadn’t finished tuning.

Maybe it was because the younger Tom was so… uncertain? Bill had no idea where they stood or what Tom was thinking – the older Tom had always been so straightforward, so certain, so… grown up.

Obviously in this time it was Bill’s place to be all that because Tom wasn’t capable of that yet. But he would grow into it eventually. And until then, Bill would just have to take things into his own hands.

“I’m super tired and I have a killer headache. I’m going to bed,” Bill finally decided and got up while Tom watched him from his place on the couch.

“Yeah, it’s getting late,” He agreed, getting up as well and following Bill into the hall towards their bedrooms.

Bill paused in front of Tom’s door, and so did Tom, looking slightly confused.

“Goodnight then,” Tom said hesitantly, still holding his guitar in one hand.

“Yeah, goodnight.” Bill smiled warmly. Though this Tom wasn’t at all like the older version from the future, there was still something about him; something different that Bill had never seen before. Probably because Tom had never shown it.

Without a second thought, Bill took a large step towards his brother and brushed their lips together in a soft kiss that only lasted a second, before he immediately retreated into his own room without another glace at his twin.

Just as Bill shut his door, he heard the loud clatter from Tom’s guitar that hit the floor. That wasn’t really taking it slow, right?   
But he just hadn’t been able to help himself – he had wanted to be close to Tom for so long and always thought it was impossible, so now that he knew Tom had feelings for him, it had been impossible not to that.

He couldn’t even begin to imagine how Tom had survived all these years…

 

~*~

Mouth slightly open in shock, Tom stood in his doorframe for a while, staring at Bill’s closed door. Had he just imagined that…? No, of course not. Bill had actually kissed him! Right?

 

 


	31. Chapter 31

The next morning, Tom awkwardly stalked out of his room. How would things be between him and Bill? Had Bill just had a nervous breakdown last night and now was back to hating him, or were they going to be... friends? But what about that little goodnight kiss that had kept Tom awake half the night?

With a deep, steading breath, Tom walked into the kitchen where Bill was bustling around, making pancakes. He hadn't made those since the accident...

"Morning!" Bill said brightly. "Coffee?"

"I don't drink coffee..." Tom said slowly. He had, however, noticed that Bill had begun drinking it since he woke up; maybe it was the stress.

"Oh...Right." Bill laughed a bit awkwardly. "Want a pancake?"

Tom nodded hesitantly, sitting down. He was still unsure what was going on between them.

"Look what I got!" Bill said excitedly, waving a bottle in front of his face. "I bought it in that American store in Berlin last week."

Tom raised an eyebrow, taking the syrup bottle from his hand. "Corn syrup? That sounds kinda weird."

"Trust me, you love it!" Bill grinned happily, snatching the bottle from him and pouring the syrup over his pancakes.

"I think I prefer maple syrup..." Tom eyed the substance on his pancake.

"No you don't." Bill shook his head determined, pouring syrup over his own pancakes too.

"Right..." Tom said suspiciously, putting a piece of pancake in his mouth. Damn. Bill was right. It was so much better than maple syrup! Why hadn't they ever tried this before? This Aunt Jemima was awesome.

"Good, right?" Bill said hopefully.

"Yeah, it's awesome." What was up with Bill today?

~*~

Bill smiled at himself as he watched his twin scarfing down his pancake. There were so many things he suddenly knew about Tom, that Tom himself didn't even know yet. He couldn't wait to show them all to him.

"How's that movie thing coming?" Tom suddenly asked, looking up from his breakfast.

"Good. We haven't really done much yet, but I know it's going to be awesome!" Ever since Bill found out that the future had been real, he was far more confident. Of course he knew he still had to work for it, but at least he also knew that if he did his best, things would someday turn out amazing.

To Bill's great dismay, they had a bunch of interviews and rehearsals that day, and he didn't get to spend any 'quality' time with his twin at all. He would much rather have preferred to stay in all day, getting to know Tom a little better, but obviously life had other plans for them.

However, he didn't miss those discreet, unsure glances Tom sent him throughout the day, and made sure to always answer them with a reassuring smile. He was well aware how confused and nervous Tom must be right now; even the future Tom had told him how awkward he had felt at first. Bill was determined to make it better this time. This time he wouldn't commit the same mistakes because he was sure he had learned a lot from the future; this time he would make it perfect. Or as perfect as these things could go.  
He hadn't forgotten the conversation about how their first few times together hadn't been so good because they had both been too awkward to talk about it... Bill was determined to make things none-awkward this time. He would talk to Tom about everything, even if Tom was really freaked out.

And so, Bill knocked on his brother's door that evening. It was already 11 and they had actually wanted to go to bed, but it was the only time he really had to spend with him, so sleep would have to be cut a bit shorter.

"It's open," Tom called a second later and Bill let himself into the room where his brother was taking his socks off, throwing them randomly into the room. Young Tom was so messy...

"What's up?" Tom asked casually, removing his shirt and throwing it into a corner carelessly.

"Uh," Bill said slowly, eyeing his skinny brother. He would grow up to be so hot once... 'Concentrate!' Bill berated himself, trying to shake the mental image of the older, dangerously sexy Tom.

"Have you ever thought of going to the gym? I think I'm going to start," Bill commented stupidly.

"What?" Tom asked with a laugh. "You want to go to the gym? Why?"

"Why not?" Bill shrugged.

"Because... You know it involves sweating and hard work, and all sorts of things you don't like, right?" Tom chuckled, pulling on an even baggier shirt that he used to sleep.

"I have nothing against sweating," Bill said suggestively, grinning as Tom gave him a slightly shocked look.

"So what's up?" Tom switched topics, clearing his throat awkwardly.

"Nothing. I just wanted to see what you were doing." Bill shrugged, plopping down on the bed.

"I was going to go to bed..." Tom said slowly, eyeing him suspiciously as he stood next to the bed.

Bill scooted over a bit, making room for him, but Tom just stared at him.

"What?" Bill finally asked. "I thought you wanted to go to bed."

"I-I did. I do. You should too. It's late and we have to get up early tomorrow," Tom mumbled.

Bill almost laughed; since when was Tom so awkward? "Yes, we do. We have a ton of stuff – I don't even want to think about it – that's why I thought we should hang out now a bit."

"Hang out? For what?" Tom asked confused.

"Didn't we want to get to know each other better?" Bill grinned, but Tom just stared at him without a comment until Bill rolled his eyes. "Stop acting as if we've never slept in the same bed before!" He laughed, throwing back the covers for Tom to get in.

~*~

Tom thought he was about to hyperventilate. Sure they had slept in the same bed before, but that had been before Bill had known how he felt about him... And before that kiss last night...

Very hesitantly, Tom crawled into his bed, lying at the very edge so he'd be as far away from Bill as possible without falling off the bed. Which was quite ridiculous because he didn't want to be far away from him, but... yeah.

"Have you ever thought about moving to LA?" Bill asked as he snuggled into the pillows.

"Sure, some day. I guess it would be really cool..." Tom said thoughtfully. He hadn't really thought about it seriously, because LA was such a faraway dream and he much preferred staying in reality.

"It would be awesome. We could get an apartment somewhere... Have a couple of dogs... I could call mine Pumba and-"

Tom laughed, interrupting Bill's babble. "Pumba? Really?"

Bill also laughed, punching him lightly. "Yeah. What have you got against Pumba?"

"You would have to get a really lazy, fat dog if you want to call him Pumba," Tom chuckled, turning his head a bit to look at his brother's breathtaking face that was devoid of any make-up. As beautiful as Bill was during the day, Tom loved catching a glimpse of him before he went to bed, or at any other 'make-up-less' occasion. It made him feel special because he knew hardly anyone ever got to see Bill like that.

"Yes!" Bill said enthusiastic. "He would be gluttonous and fat! And you could also get one, and call him a super long name that no one can remember so we won't have another one of those 'dog-fan' fiascos. I will just call him Leon."

"Leon?" Tom raised an eyebrow. Since when did Bill think up such concrete things about their future?

"Yes. Because his full name would be something like... Leonard Claudius Renoir Saint Francis III," Bill said slowly, causing Tom to burst out with laughter.

"What?! What kind of a name is that? I am never going to name my dog that!"

"Of course you will!" Bill said determined, though he also had to laugh at the ridiculous name. When had Bill suddenly acquired the amazing ability to make Tom feel so at ease? He had always been so uncomfortable around his twin, even though he never showed it. But now... Now he could actually laugh at whatever ridiculousness Bill was babbling about without having to pretend something. It was a strange feeling.

"You look nice without makeup," he suddenly commented randomly; it was Bill's own fault really – crawling into his bed like this.

Though Bill looked slightly surprised and flustered, he laughed a moment later. "Why? Cuz I look like you and you're a conceited shrimp?" He asked with a grin.

Tom laughed. "That's not really what I meant."

"What did you mean?" Bill asked softly, with an intent gleam in his eyes that traveled over Tom's features, lingering softly on his lips. Were this any other person in the world, Tom would have taken the invitation without question, but right now he wasn't sure if this wasn't just his silly mind playing tricks on him. Which was kinda funny because he had been in situations like these more often than he could count and he had never misread the signals, but... But now it was different because he wanted it so much that it couldn't be real.

"What are you doing?" Tom asked stupidly, receiving a surprised look from his brother.

"I'm not doing anything - I'm just lying here," Bill answered slightly confused.

"No, you're not, and you know it. You're confusing me..." Tom said slowly.

Bill raised a playful eyebrow. "Really? And I always thought you'd be good at this kind of game."

Tom frowned. "Get out," he said flatly.

"What?" Bill asked shocked, sitting up in bed.

"Get out of my room," Tom said quietly.

Now it was Bill's turn to frown. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" He asked angrily.

"I don't know what this is for you, Bill. I don't know if you're just bored with your life and want to do something stupid and funny by doing this, or if you're trying to mess with me to see how far I'd take it, or whatever bullshit, but I'm not going to play whatever twisted game you think this is. Get out." With every word, Tom felt the anger rising higher in him; what was wrong with Bill? How could he do this to him?

"What?!" Bill asked outraged. "That's not how it is!"

"Then how is it?" Tom shot back. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Me?! You're the one who's been in love with me forever and now you're kicking me out of your bed!" Bill spat back, crossing his arms.

"This isn't funny, Bill!" Tom almost yelled, hoping Georg and Gustav weren't hearing them.

~*~

Bill was about to yell something back, but his anger at the rejection was blown away as he saw the sadness in his brother's eyes. He had always naturally assumed that love/sex was a game for Tom, since that's how he had always treated it, but maybe that didn't apply in this case? He had thought that by taking things lightly and playfully, it would be easier – the way it had been in the future – but obviously the young Tom didn't want that.

"I'm sorry," Bill apologized softly, shaking his head.

Tom looked torn between anger and regret. "What are you doing here?"

"I..." Bill began slowly, trying to find the right words. "I don't know. I just want to get to know you better..."

"Really? And this is what you came up with?" Tom asked drily.

"I don't know!" Bill defended upset. "It's the way everyone else gets to know you..." The moment the words left his mouth, Bill knew that had been a rather stupid thing to say.

"Seriously?" Tom asked incredulously. "Everyone else? That's who you want to be like? Like all those nameless girls who throw themselves at me and whose name I can't remember the day after? That's what you want from me?"

"No, of course not." Bill sighed, running a hand over his face.

"Then what the hell do you want?" Tom asked impatiently.

Of course Bill knew what he wanted – the Tom from the future – but he couldn't say that because Tom didn't know himself from the future... Plus it sounded kinda weird. "I just want to get to know you..." He didn't know what else to say anymore.

Tom nodded slowly. "I'm going to sleep. Goodnight." With that, Tom switched off the light and turned around, leaving Bill to stare into the darkness.


	32. Chapter 32

Quietly and without switching the light on, Bill slipped back into his own room, still trying to make sense of the situation. What the hell had just happened? Why had Tom kicked him out? Had he misunderstood him? Was this not what Tom wanted…? But it had to be! Tom was in love with him, wasn’t he?

Upset and confused, Bill lay awake in his bed, staring up at the dark ceiling. What had he done wrong? He tried to play over the events of the evening again; everything had been fine until… Until Tom suddenly kicked him out without a warning or reason. Of course Bill hadn’t failed to notice that his twin had been upset about his comment of ‘how everyone else got to know him’ – was that it? Was he approaching it wrong? But that was what Tom was into, wasn’t it – casual, fun sex?   
It wasn’t really what Bill was into so much, though he could handle it if it meant being with Tom… The things in the future had also been casual and a lot of fun… Though that had been a bit different, hadn’t it? They had talked about it… Maybe that was Tom’s problem? After all, he had also been really upset about the ‘game’ comment and said it wasn’t funny…

Bill groaned heavily, rolling over and rubbing his face in exhaustion. He had been so sure they were making progress, and now this! It was like one step forward had taken him ten steps back…

Annoyed, mostly at himself, he got back up with a quick glance at his alarm that showed nearly 1am; he would so regret this in the morning. Why was he so impatient?

Quietly he snuck through the dark hall again, over to his brother’s room and knocked so quietly he was sure Tom wouldn’t have been able to hear it even if he was still awake.

“Tom?” He whispered desperately, opening the door a crack. “Are you still awake?”

There was no reply so he crept into the room, silently shutting the door again.

“Tom?” He said a bit louder as he approached the bed. “Are you still awake?”

Finally, Tom sighed. “No.” he whispered in a completely awake voice.”

“Right,” Bill said drily, pausing at the edge of his bed. Obviously his brother hadn’t been able to sleep either. “Can we talk about this?”

“I don’t talk to anyone else either – why the hell should that be any different with you?” Tom snapped sarcastically, rolling over to face him in the dark. So that had been it…

Seriously? He had been too casual for Tom’s taste? Since when did Tom want the serious, awkward, uncomfortable, talking thing?

“Stop being an ass, I’m trying here.” Bill rolled his eyes, stepping into the bed uninvited.

“Ow! Your knee is on my arm!” Tom complained annoyed.

“Move over.” Bill gave him a light shove. He knew this wasn’t really the proper way to do this, but he just didn’t know any better; a sensitive, upset Tom wasn’t something he was used to handling.

“What do you want?” Tom asked again, sighing unnecessary loudly.

“I want to be in a relationship with you and spend the rest of my life with you,” Bill stated firmly, knowing how ridiculous that sounded.

Tom was quiet for a few seconds during which Bill waited to hear him breathing, before he finally spoke. “Um… What?”

~*~

Tom carefully pinched his arm under the covers, just to make sure he was still awake. What the heck was suddenly going on here?! Not that he hadn’t dreamt of words like those for over half a decade, but…

“I’m sorry about earlier, Tom. I’m slightly confused and don’t know how to approach you… I guess I should have known this would be different for you than with someone else but… Well… I didn’t know. I’m sorry… I thought it would be easier to take it lightly because I know how much you hate drama and all that… I was trying to make it easier for you…” Bill’s voice was slightly strained and he sounded miserable in the dark room; Tom wanted to pounce on him and kiss him to death, but obviously didn’t.

“What happened to taking it slow?” Not that Tom wanted to take it slow, but… He also really didn’t want to die.

“Oh… yeah…” Bill said stupidly. “…You want that?” So obviously he didn’t either…

“Yes,” Tom said firmly.

“Seriously? Why?” Bill asked disappointed. Obviously this was very out of character for Tom…

“Because it’s better.” Such a lie…

“Really? Cuz it’s better, or because you’re not sure how I feel about you, or don’t even believe me, and are afraid this is just a casual, stupid thing for me that I don’t mean, and are afraid to end up hurt when I change my mind or get bored of you?” Bill asked calmly, nearly causing Tom to fall off the bed.

How did Bill suddenly know him so well?! Up until recently, Bill had known nothing about him, and now this?! “Um…” Bill’s blunt honesty made him nervous. Should he try it too?

“You suddenly decided this after coming out of a five-week coma… Maybe it’s just a phase,” he tried carefully.

“It’s not a phase, Tom!” Bill said exasperatedly.

“How do you know? You think just because you suddenly have an infatuation with me, it’ll last forever?” Tom asked skeptically. Why the hell was he questioning this?! If Bill wanted a fling with him, he was more than happy to give it. So why was he acting so stupid?!   
Oh right, because he was terrified of having his pathetic heart broken…

“It’s a little more than an infatuation,” Bill defended pointedly.

“And what if not?” Tom demanded.

Bill sighed. “Tom… I can’t guarantee that we’ll live happily ever after, but I think we have a pretty good shot. Every relationship is a risk. And in this case, both our hearts are on the line, not just yours,” he said softly.

~*~

Of course Bill knew he was playing dirty; that was exactly what Tom had said to him in ten years, but maybe it would work?

“Are you sure the reason you suddenly want this is because you actually want it, and not because you know how I feel about you and that’s what you’ve always wanted?” Tom asked hesitantly.

“Cuz you’ve been so upfront with your love confessions, right?” Bill asked sarcastically. “ _I_ was the one telling you how _you_ felt about me, not _you_ telling me, remember?”

“Oh, yeah…” Bill had a point there… “But…” What was he doing?! Why didn’t he just go for what he had wanted his entire teenage life?! “We should take it slow…” That was the last thing he wanted…

Bill sighed, nodding next to him. “Yeah, I guess,” he mumbled softly, pulling the covers up to his neck and scooting a little closer to Tom. “Just not too slow, okay?” He whispered right next to Tom’s ear, giving him goosebumps.

Did Bill not intend to go back to his own bed tonight?

With a deep sigh, Bill came another inch closer, wrapping his arm around Tom’s chest. Tom hated cuddling.   
Unless it was with Bill. In that case he loved it. Obviously.

Apparently Bill was not going to go back to his room tonight.

 

 

 

~*~

The next morning, Bill jolted awake as Tom’s bedroom door banged open, startling both of them.

“Tom, get up, you’re late!” Georg yelled into the room before stopping dead, staring at the twins who were blinking up at him from the bed.

“Um,” Georg said slowly. “Uh… Yeah… Same for you, Bill,” He muttered confused before shutting the door again.

Tom cleared his throat awkwardly, giving Bill an unsure look; as if Bill would know what to do now! Why did he always have to be the mature one here? The future was so much easier where he had been the awkward one…

“Might as well get going before we’re even more late, right?” He laughed with a shrug, trying not to be too awkward as he staggered out of Tom’s messy bed.

“Yeah,” Tom agreed weakly, getting up as well while Bill peaked out of the room to make sure the coast was clear to sneak back into his own room without it being too weird for everyone who lived in the apartment.

Just as he was about to reach his room, Gustav walked out of his own that was just across the hall and gave him a weird look. Bill shrugged, closing the door to his room; according to what he had found out in the future, Georg and Gustav knew about them and were okay with it, right? But when would a good moment be for them to find out? These things needed to be handled with care, right? It’s not like he could just walk up to them and be like ‘Me and Tom are not boyfriends, yay!’ that was probably not the right way to go about that…

Luckily neither Georg nor Gustav seemed to have found the morning weird – or had forgotten all about it – because the rest of their day passed by normally. At least when it came to the Gs; Tom seemed far from normal. He was more quiet than usual, refraining from any crude jokes the way he usually always did; even the Gs seemed to notice that because during lunch Georg commented on it.

“Hey, you alright, man?” He asked right in the middle of their quick lunch break; Gustav also seemed concerned.

“Yeah, you’ve been acting kinda off. Are you getting sick or something?”

“No. I’m fine,” Tom said shortly, so the Gs looked over at Bill, but he just shrugged.

Before anyone else could comment on it, one of their assistants, Mark, suddenly came in. “Hey guys, the following interview was cancelled so don’t hurry with lunch. You got a break until 4pm, at which point you have that shooting for the new promo posters.”

All four of them sighed. Great; what were they supposed to do for nearly 2 hours?

“I’m going to the hairdresser!” Bill announced, first to come up with a plan.

“Seriously, again?” Gustav asked skeptically.

“Yes! I know exactly what my new hairdo is going to be!” Bill had been thinking about it ever since he got back from the future. He knew the different hairstyles he was going to get, and now knew which one was next. It was going to be so awesome.

 

~*~

Tom watched Bill departing with one of their bodyguards; his twin was acting so normal. Was Bill really so cool with this, or was he just pretending? He didn’t seem to be… Tom could usually always tell when Bill was faking it, and now he didn’t appear to be… Did that mean he was actually fine with all this? Not in the least disturbed, upset, altered, bothered, freaked out, worried, or anything else? It was weird.

“Well we’re gonna head home – you coming, Tom?” Georg asked after they had all finished their lunch.

“Oh, yeah,” he said distractedly, following his teammates to the van where he and Gustav sat in the back while Georg was in the front, chatting with their driver.

“You okay?” Gustav asked quietly after a few minutes of silent driving through Berlin’s heavy traffic.

“Yeah,” Tom muttered.

“Is everything alright with Bill?” Obviously Gustav had noticed it was something to do with Bill… What else.

“I don’t know,” Tom sighed heavily. “I don’t know what’s happening. He’s been so weird lately.” He was so tired and confused. He wanted to talk to someone, or ask someone, or something, even though he knew no one had the answers. Except maybe for Bill… But he was being so strange.

“Oh. Geo said you guys slept together last night so we thought-”

“What?!” Tom gasped. “We did not! Nothing weird happened! We weren’t doing anything! We were just sleeping!” He said horrified.

Gustav stared at him with wide eyes. “Um… Yeah… that’s what I said…” He said slowly, looking freaked out.

Tom stared at him, just now realizing the mistake he had made.

“Um…” Gustav mumbled awkwardly. “Okay so….um….”

Tom cleared his throat. “Yeah um… No. We’re fine…”

“Okay then,” Gustav nodded uncomfortably.

Oh god, this was a nightmare! What was going to happen here? How were they supposed to deal with this?  
Even though Tom had fantasized about being together with Bill since he could remember, he hadn’t really thought about stuff like this. What if someone found out?! What if Gustav suspected something? What if this somehow made its way to the media?  
Of course Tom was well aware of some of insane photoshoped pictures certain psychotic fans posted on the internet – he even had a few saved on a secret folder on his laptop – but all of that had been far from the truth until recently… What was going to happen to them?!


	33. Chapter 33

Impatiently, Tom waited at the entrance of the photo studio where they had their shot. Where the hell was Bill?! He had gone off forever ago to get his hair done and still wasn’t back. How long did hair take?!  
Oh wait. They were talking about Bill here.

Just as he was about to go upstairs to tell everyone that Bill might be running seriously late, his twin waltzed in through the doors, followed by one of their bodyguards.

“Hey, Tom. Sorry I’m late,” Bill apologized quickly as he hurried to his side.

Tom nodded, slightly dazed. “Um… I uh…” Words. Words. He needed words and he needed them now. “You’re late!” He finally brought out. Why did Bill always look so good?   
Every time he got a new hairdo, Tom was unable to stop staring for at least a week until he got used to the sight. And now… With those white and black dreadlocks that made him look beyond words… Tom groaned internally as Bill apologized with a laugh, flipped his new hair and began walking up the stairs. Why did he do this to him? He was so doing that on purpose to drive him insane; Tom knew it.

 

~*~

Throughout the entire photoshoot, Bill kept stealing discreet glances at Tom, well knowing how much Tom had liked the dreadlocks. He hadn’t thanked the future Tom enough for all the info he had given him on the younger Tom. Of course Bill was well aware he was shamelessly abusing his knowledge, but it was for a good cause, so whatever. And it had worked like a charm because Tom was unable to take his eyes off him.   
He couldn’t wait to get home… Today he would make it better.

But first they had to get through the day, which was long and trying, like most of them and by the time evening finally rolled around, Tom looked so exhausted Bill wasn’t sure if tonight would be a good night to approach him.

On the other hand… they had a ton of stuff every single day, so if he ever wanted them to get anywhere, he might as well move things along – work or not.

Bill decided to wait until after their late dinner, once both Gs had retreated into their respective rooms. Tom had been the first to leave the table, but Bill hadn’t wanted to seem suspicious, so he had waited until the other two band members were gone before quietly knocking on Tom’s bedroom door.

“What?” Tom called from inside and Bill opened the door to find him sitting on his bed with his laptop, like always.

“You busy?” Bill asked casually, entering the room and shutting the door; he knew Tom wasn’t busy anyway, he was just making small talk.

“No. What’s up?” Tom asked briskly; he looked nervous.

“Not much, and with you?” Bill continued casually, dropping down on his twins bed the way he had done a million times.

Tom cleared his throat quietly, edging a bit more to the side. “Nothing.” What was wrong with him? Was he really so freaked out by all this? But he was the one who had wanted it all along; Bill was so confused.

“What’s wrong, Tom?” He asked quietly.

“Nothing. Why? What would be wrong? Nothing is wrong. Why should something be wrong? Everything’s fine,” Tom said quickly, staring down at his laptop.

Bill raised an eyebrow; judging by Tom’s slightly reddened cheeks, he himself had also noticed how stupid that had sounded.

“I don’t understand,” Bill said slowly. “I thought you wanted to be with me… Do you not?” Somehow Bill had thought – once he figured out that the future had been real – that his brother was dying to be with him and things would be easy because this was what they both wanted, but somehow it didn’t seem to go that way at all.

Tom finally lifted his gaze to give him a hesitant look. “I…This is just moving very fast, don’t you think?”

Bill shrugged. “Not _that_ fast, Tom. Especially considering how long you’ve had feelings for me…”

“But what about your feelings for me?” Tom asked, almost desperately. Was he really so scared…? But Tom had always been so carefree and… not giving a sh*t about things…

With a slight frown, Bill sat up to face his brother better. “And how long do I have to be in love with you for you to be comfortable around me?”

“We’re brother, Bill. This isn’t really a situation we should be in,” Tom muttered.

“Ugh. Don’t give me that crap!” Bill complained in exasperation. “We’re so past that point, Tom – we already know how we feel for each other! The only issue we have right now is you being weird. I thought you wanted this!”

“Sometimes the things we want aren’t the same as the things that we want!” Tom countered.

“What…?” Bill asked confused.

Tom sighed, putting away his laptop. “Just because you are what I want, doesn’t mean that’s what I want to want.”

Bill stared at him for a moment before grasping his words. “Oh. That,” he said slowly. “I think what we want is way more important than what we want to want, because what we want to want is not what’s going to make us happy. I know that we’re twins, Tom, but it can still work.”

“How do you know that?”

‘ _Cuz I went to the future and saw it_.’ “I don’t, but I’m willing to take a leap of faith here.”

Tom sighed, giving him another one of those unsure, somehow totally cute looks that were really new to Bill. As much as he had loved the older Tom, somehow there was also something about his younger counterpart. Something Bill had never noticed before – or Tom had never shown before.

Tentatively, Bill crawled closer to him, watching for any signs of rejection, but Tom just swallowed nervous and waited. Was he seriously leaving this up to Bill?

Bill gave himself a mental nod; he could totally do this. Of course he could; this was what they both wanted. And he knew they could make it; he knew Tom was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with (or at least the next ten years for sure), so there was really no reason to be freaked out about any of this. And it’s not like they had never kissed before… Even if it was a long time from now.

Trying to keep things from getting awkward by hesitating, Bill wound his arms around Tom’s neck, drawing him closer and bringing their lips together with feigned certainty. Tom had no objection and willingly tilted his head a bit to the side, to give him better access to his lips; Bill had missed this so much. Kissing was so wonderful.

Tom made no attempt to deepen the kiss, keeping it light and superficial, and though Bill really enjoyed the soft sweet kiss, he wanted a little more action; it had been way too long since he had gotten to kiss Tom. Eagerly, he pushed his tongue past Tom’s pierced lips, eliciting a surprise sound somewhere deep in his brother’s throat.

This was so different from kissing the older Tom. The older Tom had been so… certain in his kisses, while this Tom’s tongue gingerly brushed against Bill’s, as if afraid of him. Bill almost laughed; Tom had kissed so many people in his life, and yet he was so hesitant here? Was that normal for him…? No, probably not… Whatever – obviously right now it was Bill’s turn to be affirmative.

~*~

Tom almost groaned. ‘ _Oh my god. Since when is Bill such a good kisser? Has he always been able to kiss like this? Where the hell did he learn this? Who did he kiss? I want to kill them… Oh my god, he kisses great,_ ’ Tom’s mind rambled incoherently while his twin’s skilled tongue explored his mouth with amazing conviction.

As experienced as Tom was when it came to kissing, it was rare that he kissed someone whose kissing fit so perfect with his own. Their mouths, movements, tastes and rhythms fit perfectly together, making this the best kiss the could remember having.   
Contrary to what he had always imagined from his twin, Bill kissed rough, demanding and hungry. Maybe his little brother wasn’t as sexually retarded as Tom had always thought him to be…

Since this really appeared to be happening – and wasn’t just part of one of his pathetic dreams again – Tom slowly started getting more comfortable with the situation. Alright, so kissing his twin brother was kinda weird, no matter how long he had yearned for it and no matter how many small kisses he may have stolen from him over the years, but knowing that this was also what Bill wanted, was incredibly reassuring.   
At the end of the day, Bill was right: there were no guarantees but they loved each other more than anything, which was the best requirement to make a relationship work. And if he would already give away his life, soul and heart, it might as well be to the person he knew loved him more than any other. ‘ _Gosh, I’m sappy. Thank god no one knows what I think…_ ’

Though Tom was usually a very dominant type, even when it came to kissing, Bill overruled that with ease and Tom soon surrendered to his twin’s wild tongue that obviously refused to back down.   
To his great surprise, he soon found that he enjoyed it; there was something pleasant in letting Bill have the upper hand. It made him feel safe. Something he had never felt with anyone, and was a very funny feeling to have during a kiss.

~*~

Bill moaned so quietly he was barely able to hear it over their sped up breathing as Tom slowly leaned down on the bed, letting Bill settle on top of him. As much as Bill had wanted Tom over the past few weeks, he hadn’t realized just how much until right now; the future had been fun and exciting, but this… this was so much more to him. This was everything he had ever yearned for, and it had been right in front of his face the whole time, hiding in plain sight. How had he never seen what an amazing person Tom was? How had he never looked beyond the surface of his own twin?

Gasping a bit for breath, he broke the kiss that left his mouth hot and tingly, to stare down at Tom who looked up at him with large, slightly uncertain eyes. “What?” Tom whispered a bit unsteadily.

“I um…” Bill licked his lips that felt funny from the rough kissing. “I’m sorry for never realizing,” he said softly. “For never realizing how you felt about me. For never realizing how much more there was to you than the stupid brother I always took you for… For never realizing that you were there… And all the other things about you I never noticed. Many of which I probably don’t know yet…”

And then Tom smiled. But it wasn’t one of those typical smiles Bill knew from his brother. No; it was the same smile the older Tom had always given him. That warm, soft, calm smile that melted Bill’s insides.

Tom reached up to gently caress his cheek. “I’m sorry I never told you. I’m sorry for always being such a cowardly idiot… I’m sorry for thinking you would hate me if you truly knew me.” He pushed himself up off the covers a bit while Bill leaned down to kiss him.

It was a short, sweet kiss that Tom broke with a soft chuckle. “And I’m sorry for always thinking you were a terrible kisser. Cuz seriously, you kiss so freaking amazing – where the hell did you learn that?!”

Bill laughed, sitting up so Tom wouldn’t see his blushing face. “I taught myself.” He grinned, sticking his tongue out at his brother who also laughed, unaware that it was, in fact, the truth.

 


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone ^^   
> Good news! The last chapter is finally done!  
> I'm really sorry that it took me forever to finish this story, but I've had a really crappy year and a lot of bad stuff happened, so I wasn't in any mood to write... But apparently things have started looking up a bit again, so I hope to be able to post a bit more regularly again :3  
> Sorry for the long wait, I hope you didn't all lose interest yet... I made the chapter a bit longer than usual, so he'd have some more to read x3
> 
> K, now please enjoy <3

Bill leaned back down to kiss his twin again; it was so different than kissing the older Tom. Not just the hesitant, shy way in which the young Tom kissed, but also the fact that in this time he was clean shaven, reminding Bill of the large age gap between the Tom’s. In the future, Tom’s beard had initially freaked him out somewhat, but then he had gotten used to it and now greatly noticed the absence of it.

Suddenly intrigued, Bill began groping down Tom’s chest and sides to discover all the many differences between the present and the future. It was amazing how much Tom would change in the next years.   
Bill had always somehow thought they were already pretty grown at the age of 16, but obviously he’d been wrong; the Tom lying underneath him was just a kid. A rather flustered kid who stared up at him with uncertain eyes – so unlike his older version had been.

“I love knowing you now,” Bill suddenly mumbled, reaching up to run his hand through the tangled dreadlocks. Even though he had touched them so often, he had never taken the time to really feel them. He had missed them in the future.

“What do you mean?” Tom asked distractedly.

“I mean that… That I love the fact that we’re still so young. We’ve known each other since ever – we know everything about each other. We’ve shared our entire lives… It’s so much better than meeting someone and falling in love when I’m like… I don’t know, 26 or something.” Bill shrugged stupidly while Tom laughed surprised.

“Yeah… I guess it is a lot better,” he agreed with one of his breathtaking smiles that seduced Bill into another kiss that quickly went from sweet to passionate.

Of course Bill was well aware that they had to get up early tomorrow, but Tom finally seemed okay with this so he really didn’t want to stop; he had waited a very long time for this. Already in the future he had often thought of what it would be like to return to Tom; what it would be like to get to know him in this way; what Tom was like at the beginning of their relationship.

Eagerly, he shoved his hands under Tom’s shirt to touch the skin that felt exactly like the one he remembered, and yet so different. Until going to the future, Bill had never thought of, or noticed, Tom’s body at all, but given everything that happened he was suddenly very aware of how skinny and… ‘teenagey’ Tom felt.  
It wasn’t just the lack of muscles his twin would build up in the next ten years, or even the body and facial hair; above all it was the delicate bone structure that gave Tom such a fragile appearance in comparison to his 26-year-old version. It made him look so innocent, even though Bill well knew he wasn’t.  
Of course he wasn’t; Tom was a horny little slut who had slept with more people than he could count – Bill knew that better than anyone – yet he looked so sweet and innocent as he bit his lip nervously, glancing up at Bill. So very different from the determined, assertive Tom from the future. It made Bill all possessive and eager; suddenly he felt as if he were the older, more experienced one.  
And in a certain way, he was; after all, he was various weeks older than the current Tom, and when it came to the two of them, he definitely knew more.

Avidly, he pushed Tom’s shirt up until Tom allowed him to remove it completely so Bill was free to touch his entire upper body at random.

~*~

Tom was so nervous that his hands and feet started feeling funny; what was going on here? Since when was Bill so imperious?   
Not that Tom minded, of course, but still – what was going on?! Were they about to… No way.

No matter how hard Tom tried to get his thoughts in order, it resulted impossible due to Bill’s stunningly skilled mouth that kissed around his neck and ears, almost making him moan. This was far too good to be real.

“B-Bill?” Tom stuttered incoherently, weakly pushing against his brother’s shoulder.

Bill lifted his head to give him an intense look. “Yeah?”

“Um…” Tom didn’t even know why he stopped – why did he always do these things? Why didn’t he just let Bill do whatever he wanted? “What are you doing?” He asked stupidly; he was still half certain this was either a dream or a mean prank.

Bill raised an eyebrow. “Uh… You don’t like it?” He asked surprised.

“No, no, I like it,” Tom assured him quickly; he liked it very much, actually. “I just thought… you know… um…” ‘ _I have no idea what I’m talking about._ ’

“What?” Bill smiled a little. “Do you want to kick me out of your bed again?”

“No,” Tom said immediately. “No… No, I don’t.” Even though he didn’t know what he wanted, he was sure it didn’t involve Bill leaving right now.

~*~

Bill almost laughed; so this is what a nervous Tom looked like. He remembered the older Tom having told him just how nervous he had been, but back then he had been unable to picture it.

“It’s fine,” Bill whispered softly, leaning down to kiss him again; this time he would make it much better. “We’re not in a hurry for anything – we can take as much time as you need,” he said between kisses.

“As much time as _I_ need?” Tom asked slightly scandalized. “What about you? Since when are you so… so… so… _this_?” He gestured around.

“This what?” Bill asked with a laugh.

“This this! This… not nervous!” Tom frowned while Bill just shrugged.

“I know what I want, why would I be nervous?” He reasoned.

“Because!” Tom suddenly sat up, pushing Bill aside and almost causing him to groan in exasperation. “Because unless you’ve lead a whole other life no one knew anything about, you’re supposed to be new to all this. When did you learn to do all this so well? And why aren’t you all weird and awkward the way everyone is when they start out with this shit?”

Of course Tom had a point; the first time Bill had done any of this ‘shit’ in the future he had indeed been quite awkward, but meanwhile he felt pretty comfortable with Tom, even if it was the younger one. Actually, the fact that Tom was more inexperienced in being with a man than Bill was, made him very sure of himself.

Tom continued before Bill found a suitable reply; “Have you done this before and just never told me? Or what’s been wrong with you lately? Is this some weird aftereffect of the accident? Side effect of the meds? What’s going on?”

Bill sighed heavily; the past was so much more complicated than he had thought. Back in the future, he thought once he came back here, all he had to do was confess his love for Tom who would accept it without question or hesitation and they would live happily ever after, but obviously that wasn’t the case. This was a very bad moment for Tom to suddenly begin questioning life. “I thought we had already talked about this…” Bill said slowly.

“Yes, and we agreed to take it slow. This is not slow. Especially you with all your… knowing things. Where did all this come from? It’s like you’re a different person…” Tom frowned again, shaking his head and startling Bill a little.

“What’s that supposed to mean? You don’t like me anymore?” He asked in disbelief.

“What are we, in kindergarten?” Tom rolled his eyes. “This isn’t about ‘liking’, Bill. It’s about you behaving differently from the way you were before and I’m worried that this is just the aftermath of what happened to you.”

“It’s not! I already told you that a million times,” Bill argued back as gently as he could.

“Then explain to me why you are the way you are instead of the way you always were. Because last I heard, you were too nervous to kiss that chick you were dating for a while. What the hell happened in between that you didn’t tell me?”

“I wasn’t really dating her, we went out like twice,” Bill said drily.

“Not the point!”

Bill sighed. “Ok fine…” If Tom didn’t leave him another choice, whatever. “While I was in a coma I dreamt that I went ten years into the future where I met my 26 year old self, who was in a relationship with your 26 year old self who told me that you had been in love with me since forever. Our future versions lived a very happy life in L.A. together where I eventually engaged in a sexual relation with both of us, and learned a ton of things that I want to try out now. Happy?” That wasn’t really the way he had wanted to explain to Tom about his trip to the future, but whatever.

Tom was staring at him as if he had grown an extra head. “Um… What?” He asked slowly, blinking a few times.

Bill sighed with a shrug. “That’s it. I’ve honestly never done anything with anyone other than you and me. I know it sounds weird and stupid, but it’s true.”

Tom cleared his throat. “So while I was sitting by your side day and night, fearing for your life, you were fantasizing about merrily having sex with _both_ of us in ten years?” He asked in disbelief.

Bill scratched his nose slowly. “Pretty much. Yeah.”

Tom nodded slowly. “Okay then.”

~*~

Tom had no idea what to say, because really, what do you say to something like that? He had expected Bill to confess a bunch of random sexual adventures he had had since his accident, or a double life from before that time, or being kidnapped by aliens, or something else, but this was just weird.

“So… how was the sex in the future?” He finally asked.

Bill grinned wickedly. “Want me to show you?”

Tom groaned internally; this Bill was so different. Could a comatose fantasy really change a person so much? “Wait.” He stopped Bill with a raised finger. “My future version told you that I was in love with you? How did you take it…?”

“Hm… First I was super freaked out. I caught you and my future self in bed, and oh my god, I almost died.” Bill laughed, “But then I explained it to myself and eventually your charming older version won me over,” he added with a grin. “I really liked your older self. You were all…” Bill hesitated for a minute, giving him a strange look. “Kinda like now, really.”

So this was what Bill had been talking about the whole time. Had that happened because Tom had been talking to him about how he felt? Was that what had caused such a bizarre fantasy?   
_‘But why did he fantasize about sex?! For once, I was being all romantic and unsexual in everything I said!’_ Well whatever.

“I see,” Tom nodded slowly, trying to wrap his head around it all. “And now you think we’re going to live happily ever after in L.A. together?”

Bill shrugged with a grin. “At least for a good ten years.”

Tom laughed, shaking his head. “Right… But you know that that was just a dream, right? Just because it happened like that in your dream, doesn’t mean it’s going to be like that in reality.”

“But it could,” Bill argued immediately. “Why shouldn’t it? We love each other, so why not?”

There were a million reasons for something like that not to work, Tom just couldn’t think of one at the moment, so he simply nodded. “All right then…”

Bill smiled broadly, crawling a little closer again. “So… are we good?”

Tom took a deep breath and gave another nod. “I guess so… Man, and I thought I had weird sexual fantasies.”

Bill giggled, brushing their lips together. “Your future self told me to tell you how much you _love_ having sex with two of me.”

Tom groaned loudly; that really was an interesting thought. He needed to ask Bill about a few more details from that dream of his sometime. But not right now because reality was too good to interrupt at the moment. Damn, Bill sure had learned a lot in that fantasy of his…

~*~

Bill decided that eventually he would tell Tom that it hadn’t actually been a fantasy, but not right now; that had been hard enough for himself to grasp at the time, and it required a lot of patience and evidence. He decided he would always tell Tom the things that would happen, and so eventually prove to him that it had all been true.   
Initially he wasn’t sure he ever wanted to share his adventure with anyone, but now he knew he really did; he didn’t want to keep anything at all from Tom.

In order to remove his shirt, Bill quickly broke the kiss and sat back up on his heels, throwing the unwanted garment somewhere to the floor before leaning over Tom again, who gave him an apprehensive look.

“W-we have to work tomorrow,” Tom mumbled right as Bill as about to kiss him.

Bill pulled himself away again to give him a stern look. “Seriously? Have you _ever_ not had sex because of work?”

“We’re going to have sex?!” Tom asked slightly freaked out.

“Um… What did you think we were going to do – play tennis?” Bill asked with a throaty laugh. “Now stop being such an annoying little brat, or I’m going to spank you!” He threatened with a wicked smirk.

“W-what?” Tom sputtered in shock while Bill burst out laughing.

“Nothing. Inside joke.” He grinned, covering his brother’s lips with a kiss in order to avoid having to explain it.

~*~

“Hmm?” Tom moaned through the kiss in confusion, trying to push the disturbing thought out of his mind. Was Bill really into that? Was that something he had fantasized about in his weird coma, future thingy, whatever…? ‘ _Oh god, just how naughty is my little brother?!_ ’  
And why did that idea suddenly seem so intriguing…?!

All unsettling thoughts were chased from his mind as Bill’s manicured fingers suddenly pushed between Tom and the mattress beneath him, to grasp his ass rather roughly. A sensation that Tom enjoyed so much he nearly forgot whose hand had touched him, and soon slipped inside his pajama pants, almost making him groan.   
He was still far from used to the fact that this was Bill. Even though he had thought about sex with Bill at least five billion times, he had never expected it to be so… dirty. Most of the time, he had censored his own fantasies when it came to Bill, simply because Bill was worth so much more than cheap, dirty sex and no matter how much he wanted him, he had always tried to keep things ‘clean’; but obviously that was not at all the way Bill wanted things to go because he soon left Tom’s lips and began kissing lower and lower, with an obvious destination in mind.

Tom thought he would have a heart attack any moment. Was Bill really going to…?!   
Reality was almost too much to grasp for him in that moment, especially once his twin pushed away the remaining clothes Tom had been wearing, and wound his hand around his erection.

Unable to stop himself, Tom let out an embarrassing wail, receiving a quiet laugh from his brother. What was suddenly wrong with him?! He’d gotten a million hand- and blowjobs in his life! ‘ _Pull yourself together!_ ’ Tom berated himself while his brother’s soft fingers slowly began running up and down his shaft. But no matter how much he tried to pull himself together, he was unable to swallow a loud gasp as Bill suddenly took him into his wet mouth, licking along his length.   
Well, this was definitely not how he had ever imagined it. Of course he had wanted it countless times, but always felt too dirty to really picture his innocent little brother doing something like this.

~*~

Bill tried to remember everything his older self had taught him about blowjobs. They had practiced this on the older Tom, so obviously he should know how to do this in a fashion that Tom enjoyed.   
The older Bill had said that Bill was allowed to experiment around at will, as long as he didn’t use too much teeth, but at the moment he still wasn’t confident enough for that, so he decided to stick to the basics his older self had taught him: not too deep or he would end up gagging; watching for teeth; breathing; swallowing; in and out; relaxing throat muscles; sucking on occasion; nibbling and licking.  
Just like the older Bill had said, the young Tom was a bit smaller than his older counterpart, for which Bill was quite grateful because it made things a lot easier. It was stunning how pleasant the small size difference was to his jaw.

Though the last time he had done this had been various weeks ago, Bill well remembered how Tom liked it and tried to go exactly according to what he had learned. It seemed to be working because somewhere above, he could hear Tom’s ragged breathing that was decorated with an occasional moan here and there. The younger Tom appeared to be a bit more vocal than the older one, which Bill really liked because it was very reassuring.

Just like he had learned, he made sure to not go too fast or rough in order to ensure Tom wouldn’t finish too soon, given Bill still had other plans. He well remembered the older Tom telling him that their first few times hadn’t been that good because they hadn’t been relaxed enough, so Bill was determined to make that better this time, and only proceed once his twin was fully ready.  
It was only then that he remembered he had left the lubricant somewhere in a drawer of his desk, where he had hidden it last week after buying it. Bloody wonderful…

“Tom?” he asked, removing his mouth from his brother who groaned incoherently, giving him a delirious look.

“What?” Tom mumbled.

“Where’s your lubricant?” Bill asked as calmly as possible; well that was just bad preparing on his part.

“Uh… what? I don’t have any.” Tom pulled himself up on his elbows, apparently coming down a bit from his dazed state.

“What? How can you not have any lubricant? You have sex, like, all the time!” Bill said scandalized.

“Um… yeah, but with girls,” Tom said hesitantly.

“Girls don’t use that?” Bill asked slowly, having no idea about that.

“…I don’t know. I think some do? No idea, I never bothered with that.” Tom shrugged; the young Tom was such a careless lover. No wonder their first few times together hadn’t been so good… Obviously Bill needed to handle this himself.

“I’ll be right back.” Bill jumped off the bed.

“Where are you going?” Tom asked confused, sitting up fully on the bed, looking rather awkward.

“BRB,” Bill told him, sneaking out of the room, across the dark hall and into his own. The lubricant he had gotten was still in the bag, safely stored in the drawer, still wrapped in the plastic seal that Bill removed as quickly as possible before exiting the room and sneaking back to Tom’s. The moment he was about to open the door to his brother’s room, the door next to it opened and Georg stepped out.

“Bill, good, you’re still awake,” he said before his eyes settled on the bottle in Bill’s hand, which he quickly hid behind his back. “Um, anyway…” Georg continued slowly, “David called earlier and said that the photoshoot tomorrow morning was replaced by an interview, so… you know… dress accordingly and stuff.” He shrugged.

Bill swallowed. “Okay,” he said squeakily before clearing his throat. “Thanks.”

Georg nodded, giving him a weird look. “Everything ok?” He asked a bit concerned.

“Yeah. Yeah. Totally. Good. Everything’s ok. All good. How about you? This is totally not mine,” He said stupidly, holding up the bottle while Georg gave him another weird look.

“Oookay…”

“It’s Tom’s. You know, he has sex and stuff… So he uses that kind of stuff. I was just… looking at it and stuff,” Bill rambled like an idiot.

“Alrighty then,” Georg said slowly, looking torn between worried and amused.

“So, I’m just going to bring this back to Tom now,” Bill mumbled, trying to ignore the fact that he was saying all this rubbish to Georg in the middle of the night, half naked, in front of Tom’s door, with a bottle of lube in his hand.

“Yeah, do that. Goodnight then,” Georg said passively, retreating back into his room.

Bill wanted to slap himself. What was wrong with him?!   
Well, whatever… Georg and Gustav were bound to find out sooner or later, so whatever. He needed to concentrate on more important things right now. Like Tom, who was sitting on his bed, covered with a blanket and looking nervous.

Now that things were starting to get real, Bill actually found himself a bit nervous too. He remembered how it had been between his older self and the older Tom that time, but he wasn’t sure he could make things that perfect. Though he remembered what he was supposed to do, actually doing them with this Tom - with whom he wasn’t as comfortable as he had been with his older version - was nerve-wrecking.   
But of course, this was not the moment to be hesitant; he knew how nervous Tom was, so it was up to him to make things good right now.

With a mental nod, he returned to the bed, kissing his nervous brother who was hiding under the covers. Determined, Bill pushed the covers aside without pausing to stare even though he wanted to, and pulled his brother close, groping and kissing randomly, with the hopes to rekindle Tom’s nervous erection.  
It seemed to work because Tom soon returned the affection, slowly wrapping his arms around Bill’s middle, caressing randomly all over.

Soon, the last remains of Bill’s clothes found their way to the floor, and Bill snuggled against his twin’s warm, naked body. Tom’s bare skin pressed against his felt wonderful, and Bill wrapped his arms around him to hold him as tight as possible while they kissed and caressed each other aimlessly.  
Maybe being with this Tom wasn’t as different and awkward as Bill had initially feared. It wasn’t long before he felt his twin’s hard-on grinding against his thighs, reminding him that they still had other plans than cuddling tonight. Now that Bill wasn’t so nervous anymore, his own arousal was back too, and his hand soon found its way over to his brother who moaned into the kiss when Bill began pleasuring him again.

Ignoring his own needs, Bill promptly began moving down his twin’s body again, wanting to return to the earlier place where they had paused in order to get lubricant.

“Bill?” Tom mumbled hesitantly.

“Hm?” Bill asked, nibbling and licking his way down Tom’s stomach.

“Um… Shouldn’t I also… you know…?” He mumbled awkwardly, propping himself up on his elbows.

Bill paused for a second, considering this option; he had only practiced it as the active part… Two active people was too complicated for him right now because he had trouble enough as it was just concentrating on what he was doing with Tom lying passively there without doing much. “No.” He shook his head, pushing Tom back down. “You’ve been sexually active enough. My turn,” he added with a small kiss and a smirk. They needed to keep things simple for now, if they wanted it to be decent. And Bill really wanted that.

Tom looked a bit surprised but eventually chuckled, shaking his head and lying back down without a fuss. “If you say so.”

“I do say so,” Bill said amused. “Speaking of which… If I do something wrong, you’ll tell me, okay?” He added a bit more seriously.

Tom gave him a wary look, but eventually nodded. “Sure.”

“I mean it, Tom. We have to talk about these things, otherwise we’ll be one of those typical, retarded teenage couples who don’t talk about what they really want, or how they like it, because they’re too coward. That just makes sex bad,” Bill said firmly.

Tom looked a bit taken aback. “Um… okay…”

“Good.” Bill nodded, grinning again. “Cuz no matter how many girls you fucked, you’ve never done a guy and I have no intention to suffer just because you don’t know what lube is.”

“…Thanks,” Tom muttered with a sour face while Bill laughed. “And I do know what that is…”

Bill smirked. “Good. Then pass it over, would you?” He asked sweetly, pointing at the bottle that he had left next to the pillow.

Tom swallowed nervously, handing him the small bottle. Would he object to Bill topping their first time? The future Tom had told Bill that it had been Tom who bottomed first, but Bill had no idea how it had come to that; would he have to convince Tom to it, or would he just…roll over wordlessly? It didn’t really seem much like Tom not to object to something like that.   
Nevertheless, Tom remained silent while Bill returned his attention to his fading erection that clearly needed some more caring before Tom was ready for anything further.

~*~

Tom closed his eyes and tried to breathe evenly. No matter how much he may have fantasized about having sex with Bill, in his fantasies he had always been the active one, never the other way around. How come he hadn’t ever thought of it in this way? Because Bill was always so… dainty? Girly? Innocent? Inexperienced? Beautiful?  
Or maybe simply because the thought of having something or someone inside him made him feel vulnerable and nervous?

Bill took that precise moment to brush his gel coated fingers against Tom’s sensitive entrance, nearly making him squawk loudly in surprise; luckily he managed to bite on his tongue so it just came out as a slightly muffled, indistinguishable sound.   
Would he really let Bill do this right now? Did he trust his brother enough with something like this? Bill was a virgin – what if he did everything wrong?!   
Even though Tom hadn’t ever been with a man, topping a guy couldn’t be that different than having sex with a girl, right? So obviously he was more qualified to do this than Bill… No matter how astoundingly incredible he may be at giving head…

Before Tom managed to make up his mind about the situation, Bill crawled up to him again without releasing his cock, and gave him a quick kiss. “You need to relax a bit,” Bill whispered, kissing along his neck and ear.

Tom swallowed. “I am relaxed,” he lied. He didn’t have the guts to tell Bill that he didn’t want this; if he turned him away, chances were Bill would simply leave. Everyone knew once Bill set his sights on something, it was useless to try and talk him out of it, so if Bill wanted to top, there wasn’t much he could do about it if he wanted his brother to stay the night.

“No, you’re not,” Bill murmured softly, moving back down.

Tom gave a shaky breath. “How would you know that…” He muttered more to himself than his brother, but obviously Bill heard him because he suddenly sucked on him so strongly it made Tom squeal indignantly.

“Ah! Bill!” He said loudly, grabbing a handful of his brother’s deadlocks and pulling him up to glare at him, but Bill just laughed, giving him a delectable smile.

“We’re not in a hurry. Take as long as you need. I’ll probably need a lot longer the first time,” Bill said gently, sliding his other hand between Tom’s legs again to caress him shamelessly.

Tom released his dreadlocks and lay back down without another word, refusing to let his brother see his blush. Damn Bill… What kind of a comatose fantasy had that been?!

As before, he closed his eyes and breathed deeply, actually trying to relax this time; would Bill really be able to tell? He couldn’t even tell himself… He felt relaxed, didn’t he? Okay, not really but…  
With another deep breath, he tried to concentrate on Bill’s mouth, rather than his fingers that were still caressing and massaging him patiently.  
Though it took quite a while, the unfamiliar sensation of Bill’s fingers against his flesh soon began to feel less uncomfortable.

~*~

By the time Tom finally began to relax a little bit, Bill’s jaw was starting to get sore. Maybe they should do this the other way around; Bill was certain he would be able to relax much faster than this… Or maybe not; his older self had once said that Tom relaxed easier, even though Bill couldn’t imagine it at all. The point was that Tom was starting to relax, so maybe they should take the next step.

Still multitasking, Bill poured a bit more lubricant on his hand whilst keeping Tom trapped in his mouth, and then returned his fingers to their earlier position, gently rubbing them against Tom’s muscles that had tightened again a bit in his short absence, but relaxed rather quickly this time around.  
Slowly and carefully, Bill pushed the tip of his middle finger into his brother who immediately tightened and backed away a bit.  
At this pace, they wouldn’t be done by Easter. No wonder their first few times had been bad…

Patiently, Bill waited a while before drawing out and pushing back in an inch. He repeated that same process over and over, each time pushing in a little deeper while his brother relaxed each time a bit more.   
Though the whole ordeal was a slow process, it seemed to pay off because once Bill’s jaw was officially sore, Tom was breathing heavily and almost as relaxed as his older version had been ten years from now.

Without fully removing his hand or mouth from Tom, Bill slowly poured some more gel onto his fingers, and then carefully inserted a second finger into his brother, who jerked a bit and gasped.   
Bill kept his hand still for a moment, letting his brother slide in and out of his mouth until he relaxed against the new sensation, before continuing in his earlier, slow pace.

~*~

Tom was torn between the amazing oral pleasure and the unfamiliar intrusion in his body that was starting to feel unusually good, despite being somewhat uncomfortable at the same time.  
Though he had never wanted something inside of him before, it was really starting to turn him – both physically and mentally – and he wished Bill would move to the next level before he ended up cumming, now that his earlier anxiety was wearing off. Should he say something? But he didn’t really dare… But Bill had asked him to say what he wanted… What exactly did he want? He wanted to touch him… Earlier he hadn’t dared to move his hands past Bill’s waist even though he had so wanted to.

“Bill?” He breathed out, unsure if his brother could hear him down there.

“Yeah?” Bill asked, lifting his head.

Tom didn’t know what to say so he reached down to gently pull his brother up by his deadlocks, into a heated kiss that he hoped would make him less chicken. As they kissed, Bill removed his hand from inside him, immediately making him miss the intimate contact.

Hesitantly, Tom slid his hand down his brother’s body that now lay fully beside him, and cautiously brushed his fingers against Bill’s hard length; obviously he was also ready to move on.

“I think… I think I’m relaxed enough,” Tom mumbled against his brother’s lips while he began pleasuring his brother with his hand. Bill gasped softly, leaning his head against Tom’s shoulder for a moment, making him feel guilty; he had been so lost in his own pleasure and anxiety, that he had completely neglected Bill. That was so not the way he had imagined their first time together to be… It should have been the other way around: Bill should be the one being spoiled.  
But obviously, nothing here was going at all the way he had wanted it to go. Maybe he should turn the tables and suck Bill off for a change… Even though he had no idea how to do that.

Before he managed to get to that, however, Bill returned to his lips for a rough kiss, after which he poured some of the lubricant into the hand Tom was using to caress him. Tom thoroughly covered his brother with the wet, cool substance while they shared another brief kiss, before Bill moved back down and his hand returned to his earlier ministrations, making sure Tom was still relaxed.

~*~

Meanwhile, Bill was so aroused he was long over any initial apprehension, and hoped that Tom was still as relaxed as earlier. Though he had practiced this in the future, this time he was far more turned on and it was difficult to concentrate, so no matter how hard he tried to think of everything he had learned, not much was coming to his mind. Vaguely, he remembered the future Bill telling him something about not having sex right away because Tom might need more time to adjust, but Tom had just said he was ready. Not to mention that Bill was also quite ready.

But how were they going to do this? Could Tom raise his hips enough for it to be comfortable? Should Tom turn around? But Bill wanted to look at him…   
Then he remembered what his older twins had told him: it might be better for Tom to be on top the first time, so he could pace it himself.

Carefully he removed his hand from his brother’s insides again. “Let me lie down. It’ll be better if you ride me.” Bill had to smirk at his brother’s shocked expression.

“Really?” He asked skeptically.

“Definitely.” Bill gently pushed him up, taking his earlier place while Tom gave him an uncertain look. ‘ _God, am I glad I went to the future… I would so be dying here,_ ’ Bill thought amused.

“O-okay…” Tom muttered, moving around awkwardly, obviously not really knowing what he was supposed to do.

Bill almost laughed, but managed to keep a straight face as he sat up and pulled Tom closer, kissing him while Tom slowly slid onto his lap, sitting astride him. The position easily allowed Bill to reach his brother’s backside, which seemed to have tensed a bit again; Bill remembered his older self having said that right before penetration, he had to make sure Tom was still fully relaxed because a relaxed state was easily lost at first.

This time it only took a few moments of pleasuring Tom with one hand inside him and the other on his cock, before his breathing was ragged and he began rocking his hips with Bill’s movements.   
Just to make sure things were as comfortable as possible for Tom, Bill removed his hand from his brother’s erection in order to pour some more lubricant on himself, and then slowly lay down, breaking the kiss with Tom.

~*~

Tom took a sharp breath as Bill removed his fingers from inside him, and began stroking them both with a nod. “Don’t rush it,” Bill said shakily.

Tom swallowed drily, slowly lowering his body until he felt his twin’s erection pressing against him. Though the initial pressure felt good, it got uncomfortable the moment he lowered further, so he stopped in an attempt to relax and catch his breath.   
Though Bill had been inside of him with two fingers, the size difference was shocking, and Tom closed his eyes. He had been so sure to be relaxed enough for this, but obviously he’d been wrong; maybe this was a bad idea… Maybe he should tell Bill that he wanted to stop.

Anxiously, he opened his eyes and looked down at his twin to tell him he wanted to stop, but the words got stuck in his throat as he saw the desire-filled look in his brother’s eyes. How many times had he secretly lusted after Bill like that? Now that Bill was finally returning that desire, did he really want to stop just because he was scared?

Taking a deep breath, he focused on his brother’s intense stare and the pleasure his twin’s hand was giving him; he wanted this. Even though it freaked him out, he wanted to have Bill inside him.   
Very slowly, he rocked his hips back and forth, each time increasing the pressure against his entrance a bit more while Bill held himself steady so Tom could slide around on him until he was finally relaxed enough to actually let Bill enter him.

Underneath him, Bill moaned loudly and his hand on Tom’s cock twitched a bit as Tom slowly lowered himself onto him, gasping quietly. Though it wasn’t painful, it was far from pleasurable, and Tom was mostly just doing it for Bill at this point. There was no way he could ever enjoy something like this, but he could endure it if it made Bill feel good; weren’t it for his brother’s hand on his erection, he would have been down already.

“Wait a bit,” Bill said between breaths just as Tom began to move in the familiar fashion.

“What?” He groaned distractedly; it was taking all his concentration to remain as relaxed as possible.

“Wait a moment to get used to it,” Bill advised, even though he looked as if he really wanted to move. Tom knew that sensation: the incredibly tight, delicious feeling of being inside someone but having to wait for them to adjust… It was pure torture, and he was greatly impressed that Bill had enough self-restraint to actually give him that time. Tom hadn’t had it his first time.

To his great surprise, the waiting actually helped because the uneasy feeling lessened, and soon the constant stroking of his brother’s hand spurred him on to try again.   
Carefully he rolled his hips, pulling away a bit before pushing back down again; this time it wasn’t even half as uncomfortable as earlier. Maybe it wasn’t so bad after all?

Losing a bit of his earlier fear, he moved more steadily, soon finding a slow-paced rhythm while Bill’s erratic breathing began to turn into moaning. His brother’s delicious, lust-filled voice sounded even more delectable than in his fantasies, and Tom soon began to thoroughly enjoy the sensation of having someone inside it.

~*~

Bill wanted to scream. Though he had quite enjoyed that blow-job from himself and his older twin in the future, it didn’t come close to this. Not just because it was physically so pleasurable, but also because knowing that he was currently inside his twin drove him crazy.  
It let him forget the important detail that it was Tom’s first time, and he unwillingly pushed his hips up to meet his brother’s slow pace. Somewhere in the distance he heard Tom gasping, but it just served to fuel him, and he increased the speed and strength of his strokes, unable to control himself as he felt his climax approaching after just a few short moments, despite barely having been touched beforehand. The entire situation was just too much for him to handle, and no matter how hard he tried to prologue his orgasm, he was unable to because it felt simply too good.   
Despite not having gotten much attention, his climax was exceptionally strong and lasting, mostly thanks to Tom whose pace and vigor had increased quite a lot, and didn’t decrease even after the last wave of pleasure rolled off Bill, upon which he began feeling very sensitive. Had Tom not noticed that he had finished?

Obviously not because his brother made no signs of stopping whatsoever.

~*~

Tom thought he would lose his mind. Even though he had had vast amounts of very pleasurable sex in his life, nothing at all came close to this new sensation. It was nearly twice as good as what he was used to, and enough to let him forget everything around him, other than the fact that it was Bill with whom all this happening. Why had he never done this before? It was so much better than just… the other kind of sex he was used to.

Absently, he heard Bill calling his name somewhere, and with a few more strokes from his brother, he finally climaxed, almost crying out from the unfamiliar intensity that rocked his entire body, nearly causing him to tumble over, weren’t it for Bill’s hand against his shoulder that steadied him a bit.   
Gasping for air, he slowed down and eventually slumped down on his brother who was also sweating and breathing heavily, and covered in Tom.

~*~

Once Tom had finally finished and was sprawled all over him, Bill was so oversensitive it almost hurt, but it had been well worth it: apparently this time it had been better for Tom. Their future selves would be proud. And Bill was so exhausted he thought he would pass out.

“Da fuck did that fantasy teach you?” Tom slurred deliriously, still lying on top of Bill who began laughing uncontrollably.

“Hmm… I’ll teach you all about it in time,” Bill promised once his laughter had turned into a chuckle that his brother shared.

“I can’t wait,” Tom murmured, lifting himself off the mattress a few inches to give him a lazy kiss.

Bill giggled into the kiss, carefully pulling out of his brother who groaned a bit before settling next to him and wrapping his arms around him while Bill reached up behind them to the wall in order to switch off the light. It had gotten very late and they had to be up in a few hours… wonderful.

“I think you’re right,” Tom mumbled softly as Bill settled more comfortably against him, unbothered by the disgusting fact that they were both covered in lubricant, sweat and cum.

“Of course. I always am,” Bill replied happily exhausted. “About what?”

“That we can make it.”

Bill’s sleepy mind woke up a bit again. “We will. I promise,” he whispered softly, holding his brother just a bit tighter.

~*~

Tom’s stomach leap at the words. He couldn’t remember a moment in his life when he had been happier than right now; everything he had ever wanted in the past, the present and most likely the future as well, was lying in his arms. And this time, it wasn’t a dream.

 

 


	35. Epilogue

 

Bill jerked awake as Tom's alarm suddenly went off, startling them both. Tom slapped his hand down on the annoying device, and they both groaned, falling back down into the pillows before Bill started laughing quietly.

"Ugh, what's so funny? I think I'm going to die..." Tom groaned exhausted.

Bill grinned up at the roof like an idiot. "We had sex last night," he said stupidly.

Tom snorted with laughter, lifting his head to give him a sleepy, amused look. "So we did," he agreed with a nod while Bill still grinned idiotically.

"We should do it again."

Tom groaned with a laugh. "God, yeah. We really should... But not right now because we have to work..."

"Can't we skip work and have sex instead?" Bill asked suggestively, creeping a bit closer to his brother who laughed again and pulled him into a brief kiss.

"That should be my line," Tom said amused.

"Mhm," Bill agreed, pulling him back into the kiss while his hand groped down to ensure his brother was as turned on as he was himself.

"Bill..." Tom groaned as he began caressing him lazily. "We have to get up..."

"We're already up," Bill pointed out, eliciting a loud laugh from his twin.

In that moment, a knock on the door alerted them and they both fell abruptly quiet. "Tom? Is Bill in there with you? You guys are gonna be late if you don't come to breakfast – we have to leave in about an hour!" Gustav called through the door.

"An hour?!" Bill shrieked horrified. "What time is it?" He grabbed the alarm, only to realized it was past 8pm. "Tom! Why is it only ringing now?!" He asked outraged.

Tom shrugged. "I don't need longer to get ready in the morning."

"Ugh! Oh my god! I need to get breakfast and shower and dressed and make-up and find an outfit and I'm gonna die! And look at my hair!!" Bill said hysterically, stumbling out of bed, all thoughts of morning sex forgotten as he began searching for his clothes.

Somewhere on the bed, he heard Tom laughing quietly.

"Shut up and help me find my clothes!" Bill berated him.

"I like you better without them." Tom smirked, leaning back against the headboard of the bed whilst watching him gleefully.

Bill tried not to laugh. "Shut up, Tom," he growled as angrily as he could.

Once he had pulled on his underwear and shirt, Bill ran out of the room, into his own and hastily began with his morning routine that had to be cut very short today.

After a hasty shower, a random outfit and some hurriedly done make-up and hair, Bill raced into the kitchen where the other three bandmates were already eating breakfast.

"Whew, made it!" Bill said happily, sitting down with them after grabbing a mug of coffee.

"Good. Now that we're all here, I got our schedule for today," Gustav said as he handed them each a sheet of paper containing everything they had to do today. "Oh, and here's your 50, Georg," He added, handing Georg a 50 Euro bill.

Georg grinned happily, taking the note. "Thank you!"

"What's that for?" Bill asked curiously.

Gustav shrugged casually. "Geo and I bet whether you two had something going on."

Tom spat a spoon of cornflakes on the table. "What?!" He screeched outraged.

Bill said nothing; he knew they would be okay with it in the end, even if this was not exactly the way he had wanted them to find that out. Maybe they had been a bit too loud last night...

"It's alright," Gustav continued calmly. "Georg always knew it."

"I didn't always know it. I just said it was a possibility," Georg argued immediately.

"And you read those weird stories online," Gustav said matter-of-factly.

"I do not!" Georg said outraged.

"Yes, he does. I've seen it," Gustav said to a freaked-out Tom and a slightly amused Bill. "Yup, he ships it."

 

 

 

 

THE END

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading! I hope you liked it, even though we had such a huge pause towards the end... Again, I'm sorry about that ._.
> 
> And also, a special thanks to everyone who voted and commented :3 love ya'll! You know you're the ones who inspired me to finish this xD


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